Dark Pearls And Dangerous Lies
by Tatiana K
Summary: November moves into 12 Grimmauld and romance grows between her and Remus Lupin. But he is too old and too dangerous, or so he thinks. When chance causes her to catch Lucius's eye, November must act for the Order, against her heart's desires. OoP AU
1. Chapter 1: Questions

_AU. Remus has never and will never take an interest in Tonks. _

_When November moves into 12 Grimmauld, romance begins to grow between her and Remus Lupin. But he is too old and too dangerous, or so he thinks. When chance causes her to catch Lucius's eye, November begins a second romance as a spy for the Order. Jealousy, sexual tension, and a romance that can never be public ensue! And if Lucius finds out..._

_M later in the story for: some dark themes, sexual content, violence_

_This story has had about a million titles and descriptions so forgive me for that. My other stories had titles that just came to me but this one was harder. _

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 1: Questions<strong>

November stared up at the house before her. It had emerged from the row of houses where it had previously been hidden and her stomach dropped as recognition set in.

"The Black Family home?"

Alastor Moody, who stood in front of her, eye spinning crazily, nodded and grinned at her.

"You said you'd find me a home, not a penitentiary, sir."

"I said I'd keep you safe. This is the safest place in all of London. Come on. I'll get yer bags."

November shook her head in disbelief; there was more that was Mad about him than just his eye.

The house was no better on the inside. Her bags were thumped down in the entry way and Moody took off down a corridor leaving her alone in the house. She paid no attention. Moody always showed up again eventually.

Absently November pulled her long hair back and began to inspect her new "home." She still could not believe it. She was very truly no one special and yet she had been a target of the Death Eaters. For the past six years November had worked as a secretary in the Ministry, being shuffled around from office to office until she ended up filing paperwork for Mad-Eye. Given his namesake eyeball, it took him about five seconds to realize she was "likeminded" about the changes in the Ministry. She was instantly and somewhat reluctantly introduced into his world and undertakings.

Dust rained down on her as someone walked across the floor above her. She hoped it was only Moody. The wood was all dark, closing in the large space.

Unlike Moody or Tonks, she could go unnoticed and did so when he had asked, but not otherwise. And yet…her notes and photos were in her bag, the only remainder of her home that she had not managed to ferret into her office before the explosion. The Muggles said "gas leak" but the Daily Prophet said "foul play."

In a side room a tapestry hung along the wall. Inspecting it she was able to pick out various members of the Black family. Only respect for the artifact as a relic kept her from defacing half of them.

She had fallen through the cracks, alive but presumed dead. Invisible and unknown though still very much herself. November did not even know what had put her on the radar to begin with, and that was part of the reason Mad-Eye had gone looking for her. He had found her and insisted on bringing her here, to be safe and to figure out what exactly she had noticed or where she had gone that had ended her life.

Passing back through, she wandered slowly up the stairs. This was certainly nowhere she thought she would ever see the inside of…

November turned around and let out a stifled shriek. Eyes were watching her. She tripped on the hem of her robe and went down, banging her head on the banister. The only sound in the following silence was her swearing loudly. It made her wonder how big this house really was. Standing slowly, November found herself staring at Walburga Black, whose painting was hug at exactly eye level. The dark witch glowered at her venomously but did not speak.

"What, crow?" November snarled, rubbing the bump on her forehead.

"You dishonor the Pure Blood name. You are worse than my son." The painting's voice was beginning to rise into a shrill scream. This occurrence November had been warned about, mercifully.

"Don't talk to me about honor, harpy." November dropped the heavy cloth over the painting, stifling Mrs. Black. She shook her head, feeling ill. She hated being from "pure" blood and she hated that Mrs. Black knew it with one look at her. As a child, her parents had encouraged her to marry as she wanted, that the bloodline did not matter. At school, she was told the opposite by her peers. Luckily, upbringing was stronger than peer influence.

November headed back down to the entryway. She was going to have to tell Moody there was no way. She was going to have to leave, that hiding in parks was easier than this …

But a sound caught her attention. It was a man's sound. It was a pained sound. It was coming from a landing off to her left.

A sliver of light leaked out from a not fully closed door. Slowly and almost silently, November nudged the door open to look inside.

It was a library. In the center of the room was a man. He was taller than her and thin, but not healthy thin. His shirt was half unbuttoned and she could see why he sounded as if he were in pain. His midlength grey-brown hair hung over his defined features as he looked down at unhealed gashes and cuts ribboning his chest.

The floor creaked. He looked up at her. With a small gasp she turned and ran.

* * *

><p>Remus Lupin had not been having much luck. With the political climate being what it was, he could not even get a job other than those Dumbledore lined up for him. The full moon had been five days ago and the wounds still weren't healing. Magic was little use against werewolf wounds in general and it required someone with better healing skills than himself. Usually he could find a person who fit that description, but since moving into Grimmauld Place he had been on his own.<p>

Lupin was surprised to have these thoughts interrupted by a creak of old floorboards and to look up and find someone watching him. He took off after the person, wandless. People did not just drop in here so an unexpected visitor was not a welcome sight.

He caught her in the hall, not realizing it was a her until he had a grip in her wrist. Not that she wasn't feminine, he just hadn't been paying much attention. Remus found himself face to face with a tall, willowy witch he did not recognize. In the glance that he was able to catch of her face he saw she had an unusual sort of prettiness.

She backed quietly against the entryway wall and looked at her hands, long and thin, as she wrung them together. She looked embarrassed but not alarmed by him catching her.

"I did not mean to scare you," he spoke, trying to make his voice sound more friendly and less rusty.

"You didn't." Her answer was factual and she still did not look up.

"How did you find yourself here?" He was wary of her but she didn't _seem_ threatening. Not that _seem_ mattered one niffler's whisker.

"Alastor Moody."

Remus realized she really wasn't going to give him any more information than she had to. He held back a sigh; he couldn't leave her here to go see if Moody was here and he didn't have his wand.

Her eyes were running over his chest and he self-consciously crossed his arms across his body, his shirt sleeves soaking up some blood as he did so.

"Does it hurt?"

The lady was talking softly and Remus could not hear her. "Sorry?"

Her eyes snapped up to him, dark brown eyes. "Does it hurt?"

"Somewhat." It was Lupin's turn to hold back. Being a lycanthrope wasn't something you told just anyone about.

"I could help."

"Oh. No, it's rather…complex. But-"

With a cold sickness, he watched her wand snap out of her sleeve. He had guessed wrong about her and now…Oh Merlin. His hands crept up, palms out toward her, in a gesture of submission. Maybe he could talk his way out it. He had always been the one to get the Marauders out of trouble.

Abruptly, pain hit. He let out a loud cry of pain and clutched at his chest, his knees giving out with the suddenness of it. She wasn't speaking but he could tell she was doing something to him, and her pale face showed concentration. It felt as if he were being sewn shut with fire. Gasping, he moved his hands and watched the skin bind shut and heal. Scars remained but the wounds were closed. He traced a hand over his chest, impressed.

Remus felt a hand under his arm and someone helped him stand. His knees were weak from the sudden pain but it was fading. The woman helped him lean back against the wall.

"Sorry…I just thought…it's better to ask forgiveness than permission, you know?"

Lupin only stared at her and he watched her glow red. That had been…exceptionally odd. But she had clearly healed him and that said something for her.

Remus buttoned up his bloody shirt and bowed to her, holding out his hand. "Remus John Lupin."

"November Helena Cadogan." She took his hand, showing a real smile now.

He hoped she would be sticking around, even if she did give the impression she was holding you up and performed spells on you without your consent. Sirius wasn't fun company these days and he was sick of it being an all male affair.

The familiar speedy clomping reached their ears and Mad-Eye appeared around the corner.

"I see you met our other resident!" he boomed at them. Neither was sure exactly whom that was addressed to. He made it clear by talking to November exclusively. "Remus also occupies this…"

"Hell-hole?" She finished for him.

Remus sniggered and Moody looked stern. "Maybe it's not a palace but I swear to you it is safe, November."

"Safe?" The deliberate mention of safe had caught Lupin's attention.

"We'll have it all out over the meeting tonight. Lupin, why are you all bloody?"

"Our line of work does not lend itself to pain free living, Alastor."

Moody harrumphed agreement with the sentiment and grabbed up November's bags. "I'll show you t' your room. Molly has it ready for you and you can rest till dinner."

* * *

><p>Moody, with unusual tact, waited until they were well out of earshot from Lupin.<p>

"Snuck up on him and healed him didn't you?"

Her face turned berry red and she tripped on a step. "Every time I try to explain the charm the witch or wizard decides they don't like the sound of it and refuse to allow it. But it always works at closing up wounds."

"It's based on Muggle practices, November. Staples?"

"Stitches," she corrected a bit huffily.

"Can you blame them?"

She opened her mouth to fight back but saw he was teasing her and shut it sulkily. "I do realize it's impossible for me to make a good first impression. It's not as though I enjoy it."

"He'll come around. You always win people over in the end." He dropped her bags in a room on the third floor, tromped out, and motioned for her to enter.

November looked in on her new room. It was less awful than she had expected. All of the signs of the previous owner had been cleared out and by the decorations that remained it had been a guest room even in its older days. The bed was a giant brass affair and a grey down comforter filled it; there was a large dark wood wardrobe against the wall and a bookshelf next to the bed. Her own possessions she had hidden away at the Ministry were in piles here and there.

"I'll leave you to it and send Remus after you for dinner." Moody winked at her and closed the door.

Packing and unpacking had always been very therapeutic for November. Her family had moved a lot, especially during the last rise of the Dark Lord, and she was a very efficient packer. She enjoyed starting with a clean space, like a canvas, and filling it slowly with her things and her own touches throughout. There were certain things that always came with her, one being a silver and pearl ring, which she now pulled out of a velvety bag and slipped into its customary place on her middle right finger. Now to begin on the clothes…

Sirus had been informed that there would be a woman moving in. Naturally, this was of some interest to him. Isolation did not bring women by very often, and if it did they were married or practically children.

He had stood watching her too long though and she sensed him. A wand pointed at his nose and he held his hands out to her, showing them empty.

"It's okay, Red. I'm –"

"Sirius Black," she finished, unemotionally. "Like I could not recognize you."

He squinted at her, now amused. "You don't trust me. Did they tell you-"

"Yes," she interrupted again. Very slowly the wand inched down. "But it's still very difficult to not hex you on sight. You are the most wanted wizard of our times, and until recently I would have said you deserved it."

Sirius grinned at her dashingly. "And a pleasure to meet you too, Miss...?"

"You should be able to remember should you not?"

He gave her a quizzical look. She must have been at Hogwarts while they were. He felt a prickle of guilt at having been totally wrapped up in a small and exclusive clique for seven straight years. Not that he regretted it, but as an adult he now realized there was a lot he had missed.

"November," she finally gave him her name, smirking. She knew he didn't know her; she hadn't been in his class or anything but it was fun to put him on the defense after he startled her.

"Well, I'll leave you to your unpacking, November. I just wanted to introduce myself as the master of this fine prison."

A smile cracked through her stern face. Apparently nobody was thrilled about being here. She watched him leave and called out after him.

"Call me Red again, and I won't refrain from hexing you into next week."

Sirius grinned to himself. This was a welcome change indeed.

* * *

><p>November listened from her room to the sounds of people coming into the house two floors below. Her nerves had gotten the better of her. Her story was just so…unexplained. She really didn't want to have to explain things yet another time.<p>

Two floors below, Remus and Sirius had their heads together in a corner.

"She just sneak attack healed you?"

"Yes."

"Odd…"

"Yes. And she told you we should know who she is?"

"Yeah."

"I…don't recognize her at all."

"Me neither. Though, speaking of, someone should go and tell her we're almost ready down here."

"Be my guest. She doesn't seem thrilled to see _my_ face."

"Mine is only better for the time being. Until she finds out."

"Oh, don't be such a storm cloud, Moony. She's cute after all."

Remus rolled his eyes at his friend and began the climb up the stairs.

November jumped at the knock on her door but opened it with a flick of her wand.

"The meeting is about ready to begin."

At the ground floor she was quickly gathered up by Moody who lead her into the dinning room.

Lupin entered the dining room just in time to see Molly Weasley dash to November and grab her up in a tight hug. Arthur was close behind and hugged the new woman close as well. Remus could have sworn there were tears in the corners of November's eyes.

"Hmmm…" murmured Remus. There seemed to be a history with the Weasleys that went beyond just working at the Ministry. His amber eyes followed as she was lead off to the kitchen.

The meeting progressed through dinner with Snape arriving last. Sirius nearly fell out of his chair when Snape greeted November by name with no introduction.

"We have to go through old photos and figure out who she is. Can't be one behind Snivelus," Sirius whispered to Remus.

Albus stood at the head of the table and gradual silence fell over the occupants.

"While for some of you this is a chance to reaquaint yourselves with Miss Cadogan, some of you may not know her and her recent life events have bearing in the larger picture of the wizarding world. At the request of Alastor, no names were given in the recent Prophet reports about the Death Eater attack on a Ministry employee. We can now tell you that this employee was November."

Murmurs broke across the table.

"For those of you who have not heard this report, November's apartment was incinerated after being ransacked. Muggle reports listed it as a gas leak. November herself escaped. However, she is now legally deceased in both the Muggle world and the wizarding world."

There was total silence.

"Because of these circumstances, November has joined the Order for both protection and to offer her assistance. There is quite a lot you can do when you do not exist. She is to take up residency here in Grimmauld Place and will be working as part of the Order. November suspects, as I do, that she possesses something of interest to the Death Eaters who searched her home. The Order will do all it can to assist her in her search for the cause of these attacks."

Dumbldore sat again and gently squeezed November's hand. She smiled but when Molly asked for a volunteer to help clear things away, November was first out of the room.

Remus followed, trying to seem nonchalant. Sirius gave him a suggestive thumbs-up and Lupin shot him a disapproving look. He felt bad for her. That was all.

"Thank you, Lupin dear!" Molly crowed when she saw him take up a spot at the sink. "Just rinse for November."

The witch had already begun furiously washing plates, five of them done already. Remus rolled up his sleeves and began to rinse and stack the dishes. He stayed silent, more hoping to offer the possibility of talking than a nagging voice.

"Ravenclaw."

"Pardon?"

"I was in Ravenclaw."

Remus tried to catch a better look at her face. Still nothing. But then…she licked her lips slowly, pulling her lower lip under her front teeth. That he did remember.

"You were a Prefect. Fourth year my Seventh?"

She smiled at the dishes. "Indeed, I was."

"You looked different then…" On saying it he realized it was a little stupid.

"So did you. I only ever saw you like this," and she held a plate just under her eyes pretending to read and shielding half of her face.

Remus laughed quietly. That sounded about right.

Dishes done, the pair rejoined the meeting. He was glad to see she at least looked less stressed when they came back to the dining room.

"With the changes in schedules and the addition of a new member," Dumbledore began loudly, quieting as the room silenced, "there are some changes in the pairings for Order shifts. First and foremost, Remus you will be paired with November. I feel it would be easiest for the two of you to work together seeing as you occupy the same living space. Tomorrow night?"

Remus nodded, understanding the pairing and the question. He had been staking out corners of Knockturn Alley and the fields around Hogsmead the past few nights; tomorrow it would be with November.

* * *

><p>The next day November did not leave her room until well in the evening. Her day was absorbed in her notebook.<p>

In all the years she had worked in the Ministry she had kept tabs on all of the goings on of the people she worked with. She had served as a secretary to half the people in the Ministry and so the notebook was filled. Some of the notes were merely who owed her a favor or who needed something. But in the past few years the notes had become much more sinister.

And then…_he_ had died. She pushed his name to the back of her mind. She still did not know why and now she was "dead" as well. She had hoped for a while that maybe he was only as "dead" as she was, but Arthur had given her the sad proof.

She finally snapped the cover shut and threw a concealment charm over the book. Still no answers. Secrets, yes. Conversations over heard and incriminating, yes. But anything that would lead to her demise? No.

Remus was waiting below when she dashed down the stairs to meet him.

"Sorry."

"Ready?"

She nodded. They stepped out of the house and once on the street took his arm, apparating away.

She found herself in a field looking down on Hogsmeade and in the distance Hogwarts.

"Here?"

"Yes. We just wait. If anything turns up, we investigate."

"And I labored under the misconception that what you all do is exciting."

Remus laughed and sat against a stump, pulling a book from his pocket. With a pointed look at November he held the book covering half of his face and began to read.

Hours passed and November ran details through her mind like sand through a sieve, hoping one would stand out and give some answer. And Remus read, absorbed in the book.

When turning pages he did note the ring she spun on her finger. Finally curiosity overcame him.

"Your ring…" he smiled to himself realizing he was now modeling her style of conversation. "may I?"

She held her hand out and was surprised when he took her hand in both of his. He looked the ring over closely while she did the same to him by the light of the stars and the moon. His face was defined and strong, but not sharp and jutting like her own. And the scars…there were hundreds of fine white scars and one or two purple-red scars of more serious injuries. She only knew a certain kind of person who would accumulate so many scars in parallel groups of four…but that was his business, she decided. The half moon over her told her she was safe tonight.

"It's a lovely ring," he said, releasing her hand gently. The ring was large and silver. The main part of the ring was flat and diamond shaped, curving around her finger. In it were pearls, and grey gemstones, smoky and sparkling.

She beamed at him for the second time ever. "Thank you."

He was about to go back to his book when she caught his attention.

"I realize we had a … special introduction but …Would it be a terrible bother if we just…talked?"

"No. Not at all." He tucked the novel back into his cloak.

"Who are you?"

The question took him back. "Remus-"

She cut him off. "No…like…what do you like to do, what food do you like, what do you never want to do ever again?"

Remus's eyebrows jumped up into his hair and a smile crept across his face. It had been a long time since anyone had asked him kinds questions, or really any questions about himself. He had been long surrounded by people he had known for years and men did not really ask those questions of each other.

He leaned forward, resting his elbow on his knee and his chin in his hand. "Well, let's see…"

* * *

><p>The two of them nearly overstayed their shift, risking being seen by Hogsmeade below them.<p>

Whatever questions Remus answered always led to more questions from November. They were non-invasive and often light. She seemed content to just listen to someone talk and seemed genuinely interested in the answers he gave her. Everything about her relaxed as they talked and he found himself absorbed in the conversation. When her questions were turned back on her, she had a ready answer as if they were all subjects she had thought of before.

Her least favorite food was blood pudding (because blood was not intended for consumption) and his least favorite item of clothing was overly long scarves (because the options were wrap yourself up like a mummy or trail the ends like Dr. Who). If she were a color she would be grey and he decided he would be an owl if he were an Animagus (he comforted his conscience by telling it that a wolf would not have been his choice). She liked feathers but thought feather dusters were gross and he hated wool because of the way it felt when wet.

They apparated back to Grimmauld Place, still continuing the conversation.

"Last questions," November yawned, grinning but looking forward to her bed. "What was your best year at Hogwarts?"

"Third."

"The forging of the Fiends?"

"Fiends?" Remus sounded shocked and November giggled. Molly had left them coffee and November poured them both a cup.

"That's what the Ravenclaws in my year called you four. You drove them all crazy. We can be a stuffy bunch sometimes."

"Always good to have my pride checked I suppose," he drawled at her but he was smiling as he said it. "You?"

"Fourth I suppose. Everything just went well that year. And your question?"

"Questions?" Sirius had come to wish them a good morning after a night of not sleeping.

"It passes the time," November explained. "You have a go then. Just ask any question you can think of."

"Last wizard you dated?" Sirius's grin died when the witch he had meant to tease blanched white. He had hit a nerve somehow. "Merlin! I didn't mean to –"

"It's fine," she brushed his protests aside. She collected herself and thought back. "Excepting one, Xenophilius Lovegood."

Remus shot coffee across the room and Sirius stared open mouthed.

"You cannot be serious," Remus coughed. "He is certifiably insane."

November shrugged. "You taught Luna right?"

"Yes."

"She's a sweet girl, largely because he's a good father. He's a good man. But yes, he is insane." November grinned at the still surprised men. "Well, I'm off to bed. Good morning to you both."

"That was unexpected," smirked Sirius once she had gone upstairs.

"I truly wondered how he met his wife. But I suppose there must have been some charm in him."

"Not what I meant."

Remus looked at his friend questioningly.

"You leave here with the quietest witch I have ever seen and you come back laughing and thick as thieves."

"And…?" Remus did not like the look he was getting.

"Oh nothing."

Lupin rolled his eyes. "It isn't unheard of to just talk to a woman, Sirius. You could even try it yourself sometime."  
>"And of course you wouldn't mind."<p>

Lupin gave him an unimpressed look.

"Alright! Just checking. If my best friend's falling for someone, I want to be in on it."

"Should someone ever be unfortunate enough for that to happen, you'll be the first to know. Night."

Sirius smirked at Lupin's retreating form. "I'm sure I will," he murmured to himself.

* * *

><p><em>I tried writing this in a very different tone and manner before and it didn't go so well…But I still love the ideas I had for it so I have restarted and refreshed it.<em>

_And don't worry: She isn't a MarySue who is the most vital character of all time and who must be protected at all costs. Just a victim in the darkening wizarding world. _

_If you're looking for Lucius, he will crop up a bit later in the story so keep reading! _

_Review if you are interested in seeing this continue! Also, reviewers get previews of the next chapter!_


	2. Chapter 2: Secrets

**Chapter 2: Secrets**

Remus realized early on that refugee life made November intensely restless. She was not someone who was designed to stay contained and quiet. Her first project was to attack the house, which held it's own against her.

The noise above his head first drew Remus's attention. He and Sirius tended to keep to themselves so though he itched with curiosity, he determined to stay out of her business. He had to admit, though, something about her was magnetic. It was never long before he caught himself making up some excuse to go speak to her. Recently she had been bringing her notebooks and papers down to the library and sifting through them there.

After hearing a scream and a loud thump two floors above the library, Remus decided the gentlemanly thing to do would be to go make sure she didn't kill herself. Whatever it was that she was doing.

Walking into the spare room next to November's, Remus watched as November perched dangerously on a ladder and trying to summon things from high shelves to be boxed and stored. Where she had gotten the boxes from was a mystery to him but she always seemed to be pulling things almost out of thin air.

"Accio book!" November cried, unaware he was behind her.

Remus grimaced realizing it was a bit of a stupid mistake. He ran over to her as every book on the shelves flung themselves at her. Hitting her in a confetti-like burst, the ladder wobbled and went out from under her. With a small shriek, November toppled from the ladder and into Remus's arms. Had it been some sort of romantic movie it would have gone successfully; instead, Remus really was not as strong as he had hoped, she was heavier than she looked, and he toppled over. She landed on his chest and rolled over his head, crushing it into the floor.

"Oh Merlin! I'm so sorry!" November scrambled over to him, not even phased by his sudden appearance. His nose was spouting blood and she held the sleeve of her shirt up to his streaming face. Remus jumped a bit but she did not notice, or kept it to herself if she did. He was not used to people caring for him in this way; most witches and wizards avoided his blood as if it were acid, fearing contamination. But most people didn't soak up other people's blood with their own shirts either.

Her fingers rested on his scruffy face and her hand was warm and gentle. Had Remus not been preoccupied with trying not to breathe blood, he would have noticed her other hand resting on his knee.

At last the bleeding slowed. Pulling both hands away November cleaned the blood out of her shirt with a wave of her wand.

"This time I'll ask," she smiled at him. "Mind if I take care of that for you?"

"This time I'll say yes," Remus joked back.

Another wand wave and the pain and swelling were gone. She was a good healer.

"What on earth were you thinking?" he teased, beginning to pick up the books that covered the floor.

"I wasn't," she grinned cavalierly. "I was just so damn bored. Thought I'd clean the place up. Your friend was busy with a bottle of Scotch so I thought I'd leave them alone together."

Remus nodded exasperatedly. There were certainly more constructive ways of handling stress.

"How do you deal with it?" Her eyes had snapped on his face.

"What exactly?"

"Being trapped like this? I mean, technically I'm dead so I could go out and you could too but there's still risk."

"Oh. Well, mostly moping and avoidance of reality." He had meant it to sound funny but it was too close to the truth. November gave him a sad smile.

"Well we can't have that now can we?"

"So what shall we do?"

"Make a home of this prison." She handed him a sponge and grinned broadly.

They attacked the room eagerly, both working off frustrated energy and happy for an outlet. In the heat of the summer the windows had been thrown open and November finally declared robes "worthless contrivances" and tossed hers aside, revealing a tanktop and Muggle jeans. Remus quickly followed suit in a short sleeve white shirt and khakis.

He did catch November smirking at him. "What?"

"Nothing."

Her playful tone encouraged him to pursue it and so he pressed her about it.

"You just… you always look do formal and proper."

"Normally I get poor and clean."

Another sad smile from November told him he had again shown more of his hand than he had intended. She had that effect on him and he did not understand why. Once he had nearly told her about his…condition, without any solicitation from her. And what was stranger was that she had seemed to be expecting it. But of course he had caught himself and she still did not recoil from him as a result, or so Remus believed.

"It's…" she blushed red and looked away abruptly, instantly catching his attention.

"Yes?" Remus grinned and stopped scrubbing at the wallpaper in an attempt to gain her facial expression.

She looked in her very direct way at him and opened and shut her mouth several times before speaking. "You just…look very … attractive. You always look collected and … professorial."

It was halting and she immediately went back to blushing and scrubbing at the shelves in front of her. "Not to be a creep or anything, but if you hadn't heard it before I thought someone should tell you."

Remus returned to scrubbing, mulling her words over in his mind. He did believe her; she was so sincere and blunt that she would tell anyone something like that if she thought they needed to hear it as quickly as she would tell someone their outfit made her blind. But should he reciprocate?

"As do you. Look attractive, I mean." He coughed and avoided her eyes. He could feel her looking at him. "Any man would surely agree."

Remus felt these last words restored some platonic feeling to the sentiment. It wasn't that he wanted to jump on her or anything. But she was well built and while her face was angular and jutting he found it pretty in its high cheekbones and heart shaped face.

When he heard her scrubbing resume he snuck a glance at her and saw her grinning to herself.

* * *

><p>A long fingered hand pulled the book away from Lupin's face and he instantly glowered up at the villain who would do such a thing. At this moment it happened to be November.<p>

"An agreement must be made Sir Lupin." She had taken to knighting him in her addresses to him.

He pulled his legs closer to himself on the chaise and she perched on the end, bright eyes on him.

"Oh I do not know, Lady Cadougan. My own territories are closely guarded."

"Exactly!" November giggled to herself at his baffled expression. He was fun to banter with and he always held his own. "We have been thrown together in life and I shall go out of my mind if I am isolated, as you well know. I need a friend, someone I can talk with. I feel," here her speech slowed as she lost some of the confidince that had gotten her here, "you may have similar inclinations and that you could be…a friend."

Remus sat up and smiled easily at her. "You are not mistaken."

November stared at her hands but was grinning broadly. "I'm glad. Very glad."

With her abrupt decision to solidify what already existed between them, November bound them to the painful events that would soon follow.

* * *

><p>The packing and cleaning extravaganza became a group project. Once they convinced Sirius that the merits were greater than that of drinking he had joined them.<p>

Some interesting discoveries were made. One was that Regulus's room contained a museum's worth of poison. Remus would not let either of them even touch half of it, recognizing them on sight.

Another was that, with tons and tons and tons and TONS of polish, the Black House could actually shine and brighten up. The dark wood gleamed with warm tones beneath the dust and grime and gave some positive light to the place.

A constant thorn in their collective side was the painting of Mrs. Black. Since it was a painting there was no way to magically silence her and curses placed on the painting made it an even bigger threat to try to destroy. It seemed as if there was really no solution other than to live with it. But they had not accounted for November.

One day, after a full afternoon of Mrs. Black's screaming, November had hit her limit. Throwing a book across the library, November stuck her arm into the pocket of her robes. Expecting the usual antics, Remus was shocked to look up and see her arm in her pocket up to the shoulder. He was even more surprised to see her pull out a painting.

As he looked at the painting he felt he had seen some part of it before, somewhere.

Sirius, waking from his catnap with her throwing the book, looked over at the painting and lept out of his chair. "Where did you get that?"

"Old family heirloom," November answered.

A small knight in the painting waved back at the trio. His fat grey pony continued to graze, ignoring them.

"Hello, Sir Cadogan," Sirius greeted. "How do you know our dear lady November?"

"Why she's my great great great great great great –"

"granddaughter," November interrupted. "Could you do me a very crucial favor, Sir?"

"Why of course my lady! What shall I do? Fight a villan? Slay a dragon?"

"Oh far worse indeed."

"My lady! I will do my best!"

"I require of you the silencing of a great and unholy siren."

The knight in the painting stopped, listening. "Aye! I hear! For you, my daughter, I do my very best!"

The little knight dashed out of the painting. The screaming in the hall increased along with valiant shouts from Sir Cadogan.

"That little guy was one of the funniest paintings I have ever met," Sirius grinned at her.

"I know. He is the sweetest and most ridiculous man I've ever met."  
>"Clearly a relation then." Lupin's quip earned him a pillow in the head.<p>

The sounds in the hall died. The brave knight returned, sporting a black eye.

"I have done it, noble lady. Though she be a formidable opponent!"

"I can only imagine," November grinned at him. She blew him a kiss and he bowed nobly. She replaced the painting in her magically deep pocket.

"One never knows when relatives will come in handy," November smirked. And indeed, Mrs. Black remained silent for their time in the house, gagged by the valiant knight with the fat grey pony.

* * *

><p>The cleaning finally wound down toward the end of two weeks with only one other altercation.<p>

Remus had discovered a boggart in the root cellar cupboard. Since it had taken him unaware he had left and decided to deal with it after gaining the help of November. She was a skilled witch and he was sure she could help if not take care of it all together.

"You remember the spell?" He asked her, kneeling down by the cupboard.

"But of course."

Remus flung the cupboard doors open. November readied herself, wand pointed. And she froze.

It had been a long time since she had actually encountered a boggart and her fears were very different now.

Remus was even caught off guard. He stared at the figure hovering in front of him.

A man hung in the air. He was very clearly dead, though he was young and whole. His arm reached for November and she recoiled. His mouth worked and his eyes flashed at her. The man's voice was faint but even Remus could tell what he was saying was important.

Tears began to roll down November's cheeks. "I don't understand. I don't understand!" she cried at the figure, pushing away from it.

The boggart was closing in on her, bringing Remus to his senses. "November!"

His shout brought her to her senses. While there was hardly humor in her mind now, the figure before her was wrapped up in some of her happiest moments.

"Expecto Patronum!"

A silver owl bloomed from the end of her wand, beating it's wings against the boggart. It was enough to drive the boggart back toward Remus. The shape shifted from the man to a hovering and glowing ball. Through her streaming tears, November saw a cloud float across the face of the ball, and she knew with out a doubt what Remus really was.

After forcing it back into the cupboard, Lupin flew to her side. November was on the floor and sobbing. It had been so long since she had seen him…and she was no further now than she was then.

Strong arms lifted her gently, shifting her off the floor and onto a bench seat in the root cellar. Remus hugged her to him, stroking her long hair as she sobbed. What that had been about was beyond him, but had totally unstrung her and he would do all he could to comfort her.

Sirius found them this way half an hour later. November's head had slumped against Remus's skinny chest, fast asleep, and Remus held her in his arms.

"What happened here?" Sirius smirked.

"Nothing good," Remus murmured. "The boggart completely undid her. She cried, Sirius."

The light in his friend's eyes changed from amused to alarmed.

"What was it?"

"A dead man. Talking to her. She repeated she didn't understand him and then…"

"What in Merlin's beard could that be about?"

"Beyond me."

"Did she see yours?"

Remus's face paled. This had not occurred to him. He tried to think back and could not remember where she had been in the room or even where she had been facing.

"I…I'm not sure."

"Well, can't have been too bad if she did," Sirius nodded at her curled against him, the old smile back.

"Oh, boil your head." But there was a pleased tone in Lupin's voice.

November stirred and woke, silencing both of them. She rubbed her puffy eyes and blinked sleepily. The owl patronus seemed to fit her as she blinked at them in the light.

"What happened?"

"The boggart?" Remus offered, gently.

"Ah. Yes. That." She rubbed her eyes again and sighed. "I wasn't much help, was I?"

"Boggarts aren't malevolent. It can wait."

November nodded idly and left the root cellar. Turning at the door she looked back at Lupin. "Thank you, Remus."

Lupin nodded, smiling at her, and she left.

* * *

><p>Lupin watched November absently over the edge of his book. She had a book open in her lap and was working on twisting her hair into an elaborate and lovely design with pins as she read.<p>

It never sat well with his memory that she had red hair. Something just seemed as if it didn't fit her. Not that he really remembered her either so he could very well be wrong.

The next morning, November was not at breakfast. Wondering if some breakthrough or news had been received Remus decided to check in on her.

As he knocked the door swung slightly open and he saw a witch with brown hair, back to him, standing over the side of the bed, looking down on something he could not see and pointing a wand.

But where was November?

Remus made a quick decision about what to do; after all, strangers did not get here on accident. "Stupify!"

The figure hit the wall and dropped. He dove onto the bed, standing on it and looking down on…

"November!" He restored her as quickly as he could. "What are you…who was…"

Her hair was a medium dark brown, golden tinted in the right light. It gave her an entirely different appearance. She looked softer. She looked more real and more as he remembered her.

Her first words were rather salty as she felt the bruise on her cheek.

"Are you possessed?"

"I thought…I didn't see you and…"

Her head took its usual birdlike tilt. "You didn't know it was me?"

"I thought I was helping."

November could not help but smile. She picked up some of the papers she had been charming and shoved them in her drawer.

"If I may, which is it?" Remus asked, trying to remember if this was an issue like a woman's weight or not.

"Oh the hair?" She smiled at him. "This. The red is disguise. I tried to think of a color as far from the natural as possible."

"This is much nicer," Remus spoke before he realized he was speaking.

But November was not taken aback at all. "You think so?"

"Indeed."

"I may have to leave it then. It is easier."

The rest of her time with them, November's hair was it's natural dark brown within the walls of Grimmauld Place and red outside of them. Whenever he saw it, the brown hair made Lupin smile. Some corner of his mind told him easier or not her hair would stay brown when he was around.

* * *

><p>At the next Order meeting several big announcements were made.<p>

The first was that Harry, the Weaslys, and Hermione would be staying in Grimmauld Place until school started, effective next week. Sirius was out of his mind with pleasure at this, though Remus and November were a bit less thrilled. More people meant less quiet and less privacy. They exchanged glances, understanding the common feeling without words.

The second announcement was pure gossip but significant gossip. Lucius and Narcissa Malfoy had split up. Who was to blame or who did the leaving was unclear but both parties agreed it was final and would soon be official. Severus was only able to offer guesses that Lucius's renewed activity with Dark Wizards had pushed Narcissa to the edge and that Lucius had deliberately pushed her for divorce.

The third announcement was that there was activity in the Ministry involving the Dept of Mysteries. Lucius Malfoy was connected to the whole affair though exactly how was not clear. Because of this, night shifts would be postponed and all would serve day shifts who were able. This included Remus and November.

"In all respect, Professor," Remus interjected. "November is supposed to be dead and I am on a watch list. We can hardly go strolling through Diagon Alley."

Dumbledore's eyes twinkled as he looked over at November. She glowed with pride, knowing exactly what he was asking of her.

Sirius had been dozing when Tonks' laughter woke him and he found November's wand pointed at his nose. He spoke and was stunned when it came out higher than usual.

"What have you done to me?" He shrilled and rushed to a large mirror on the wall. The Weasleys were rolling with laughter as were Tonks and Kingsly and it was not hard to see why. His nose was now petite and feminine, changing the entire look of his face as well as the pitch of his voice.

"I am sure, Remus, that she will be able to sufficiently hide the two of you." With a wave of his wand Dumbledore restored Sirius' nose to its proper size.

* * *

><p>The end of dinner and the departure of the Order found Molly and November putting fresh sheets on the beds. After Sirius and Remus finished the dishes, the ladies were off to begin the chopping for the meals that would be coming.<p>

It was midnight before Remus and November were together in the silence of the house. There was almost a silent agreement about where they would go as the house filled up in the coming week. In their cleaning they had discovered a loft, just above the third floor and just below the attic.

Once they reached it November turned to Lupin.

"How are you at transfiguration?"

"Good enough. Why?"

November dropped a galleon and two sickles on the floor. "That's about what I'm willing to pay for a couch and two end tables." She smiled at him and it clicked.

With a wave of his wand, a couch grew out of the galleon, brown and gold colored and very plush. Two silver end tables stood on either side, slightly tarnished but sturdy.

"A secret alcove," November admired. "We could take turns here or-"

"Nonsense," Remus waved her suggestions aside. "I am perfectly capable of sharing if you are."

"Oh I believe I can manage. You do take up an awful lot of space though," she teased, poking him in his very skinny ribs.

"Oh!" November began to rummage in her pocket, again up to her shoulder. "If you don't mind, my poor great-great-many-great-grandfather would like out of my pockets."

"By all means."

Sir Codougan was quickly fixed in place on the wall over the couch. The picture was currently empty but November knew he would be wandering around Hogwarts.

Stepping back the place looked almost cozy.

* * *

><p><em>Your thoughts are appreciated! Reviewers get previews of the next chapter!<em>


	3. Chapter 3: Friendlier

**Chapter 3: Friendlier**

November clearly enjoyed employing her impressive ability to charm appearances. Each day it was a new absurd look for the two of them, anything ranging from Lupin with an afro to November with a unibrow. It always struck Lupin that whatever she chose for them looked completely natural, even if it seemed exaggerated.

The pair had been positioned in Diagon Alley, crossing into Knockturn often enough to see and not be seen. So for the most part their job involved loafing around outside. While the weather was nice this would be perfect but neither was looking forward to the bitter winter.

The questions 'game' occupied their time until the light questions were out of the way. Remus loved how odd and amusing November could be, while she enjoyed hearing his thoughts, which were often contrary to her own.

It was cooling off and November, wrapped in a kimono like top and currently sporting black hair and thick eyeliner, was quizzing Remus on the kinds of books he considered best for fall. Remus had retorted that it was not fall but late summer until she had pinched him and told him to stop stalling. Today she had done her best to make him look like a Weasley, mostly for her own amusement: bright red hair, freckles, and the sharp chin present in Ginny and Bill. His golden eyes looked even more catlike peering out of the shaggy red hair.

"I suppose plays seem fallish," he finally answered.

"Plays?"

"Well you know…_The __Elder __Wand_, _Pemberly __and __the __Persimmon_…"

"Dark plays then?"

"Fall seems to carry dark with it. So yes."

"Refresh my memory on _Pemberly __and __the __Persimmon_."

"Wizard falls in love with witch. Witch is engaged. Fiancé is dark wizard. Good wizard convinces her to carry on an affair. Witch agrees. They are discovered. Witch is killed and wizard is captured and forced to relive their relationship and it's end daily."

"Ah yes. Loads of fun," November teased. "But indeed very fallish."

"I always liked it actually."

"Well, that's the Gryffindor in you I suppose. Personally, it seems an awful mess."

"People would do a lot for love I suppose…" Remus met her eyes evenly. With a cough he changed the subject: "Poetry is also fallish, I believe."

He caught the face November made out of the corner of his eye and gaped at her. "You don't like it?"

She laughed. "I don't even read it! It's intolerable!"

Remus only stared at her for a minute before fishing wildly around in his pocket. A small blueish book was produced and November laughed again.

"You carry it with you?"

"This from the woman who until recently carried her great-grandfather with her in her pocket."

November laughed and did not argue with his point.

"I shall read to you my very favorite Muggle poems and you shall love them. That or I shall petrify you and read them to you while you can't run."

"Well under such duress I surly cannot resist," November returned, sticking her tongue out at him.

Remus coughed dramatically and began to read. His voice changed, becoming more sonorous and rich with each word. He was an excellent reader and November found herself paying attention in spite of herself.

The poem ran as such:

"_There is no frigate like a book_

_To take us lands away _

_Nor any coursers like a page _

_Of prancing poetry._

_This traverse my the poorest take _

_Without oppress of toll;_

_How frugal is the chariot _

_That bears a human soul!"_

November smiled over at him as Remus closed the book and gave her an inquiring look.

" I must admit," she said hesitantly, "that was much better than I expected. And much shorter."

"'_Not __as __terrible __as __I __thought.__'_ Well that's something. I felt it would be one you could identify with."

"Indeed it is. I love reading more than almost anything else."

An explosion from nearby interrupted the moment and both were on their feet in half a moment.

Tearing around the corner they were brought face to face with a glowing blue spell. There was only one moment to react and Remus did not have time to question his actions. Grabbing November close to him he pushed her up against the wall to her right.

Time froze for a moment as their eyes met. Her soft body pressed against his. His lean body holding hers tightly. Their faces so close their lips brushed together. November flushed slightly. The spell passed them but neither moved. Remus realized his hands had moved to her waist and the other was wound in her thick hair. November breathed in his special combination of smells: warmth, chocolate, old books, and something masculine and reassuring. But even while they savored this moment time picked back up and the fight was on.

The explosion had been from an odds and ends store. A Death Eater was fighting his or her way out of the ruined store with a bag of what appeared to be jewelry. Even as she saw it November did not believe it; these were Death Eaters, not jewel thieves. And in broad daylight?

A well placed spell by Lupin slashed the Death Eater's hand and he bag dropped, spilling it's contents. November sent the bag whizzing back into the store. The Death Eaters did not go back after the bag. Their aim had now changed to killing Remus and November.

"Block me!" Remus shouted to her. He did not remember tons about her from Hogwarts, but it had always stuck with him that she was the best charms student in her class. Her shields would surely be better than his own.

A glowing blue ball lept around him and November dove out of the direct line of fire. She could maintain the shield but not while firing her own spells.

Remus's dueling abilities were formidable and with the aid of November's shield he burned and cut up several of the Death Eaters. The Death Eaters quickly decided they had had enough. The people who had tried to hide nearby were of no concern to them and protecting these people divided November and Remus's attentions. Ducking into a cluster of people, there were three loud cracks and they were gone.

"Hell!" Remus gasped, panting for breath.

November let the shield drop and sunk to the ground. She was out of practice and told herself to work on shields more at home.

Remus held out a hand to her and she accepted it. She was brought face to face with him and a smile flitted across his hard features. They both began to climb through the rubble that had once been the shop. Other witches and wizards nearby helped them now that the Death Eaters had gone.

The shop owner was finally discovered under the battered counter. He was pulled out and November began to check him for injuries as Remus soothed him. The poor old wizard who owned the store was badly shaken but alive and almost unharmed. Cuts were easily mended and his broken arm was placed in a splint, with November preferring only to mend bones if there were no other options.

When he regained his voice the man was hysterical. "They wanted to run off with me rings! It's took me long enough to find them and they are all quite magical! So I's told 'em no!"

"As well you had every right to." Remus could not suppress a smile at the man's rather stupid but spirited response.

"And they blew up me store!"

"Did they say what ring they wanted?"

"No. They looked at them all though. Put them all up t' their eyes, too close to actually see the ring I would think."

"Odd…" murmured Remus. They must be looking for a ring that would perform a specific action. But what and why their eyes?

Sound of running feet and whistles reached their ears and November grabbed Remus's arm. "That's our signal! Bye!" she chirped at the man and the two Apparated to the other end of Diagon Alley. They watched the man being helped until they were sure all would be well before exiting quickly into the Muggle world. It would be safer to take a bus home than risk magical means. Neither was really in a position to be questioned. After all, November was dead and Remus was less than human.

* * *

><p>When Harry arrived at Grimmauld Place, November aimed to be well out of the way. It was Sirius's moment, as well as Remus, and she really had nothing to do with any of it. Her interaction with any of them was limited to hexing Sirius a number of times and Prefect duty with Remus.<p>

November was well hidden away in the kitchen when the stampede told her he had arrived. The windows were open, letting in a breeze in the suffocating London heat. For about half an hour there was talk and laughing far from where she was and she wrongly assumed she would be left alone.

Voices drew closer to her and November heard what she assumed was Harry and Sirius.

"So it's just you and Professor Lupin here?"

"Ah! No, November's living here too. Where is she, Lupin?"

"Hiding in the kitchen."

November swore out loud as she heard the amusement in his voice. A group bustled in and she lept off her stool in the corner, making sure her papers were closed and out of sight.

It was the first time she had ever seen the Boy Who Lived. She didn't really know his parents but she swore if he turned to the side he could have been the obnoxious boy three years above her from all those years ago…

"I'm Harry," he said, holding out a hand to her.

"November Cadougan. A pleasure, Mr. Potter."

"You mean like Sir Cadougan?" The excitement in his voice surprised her.

"Yes. He's my great-grandfather. How do you know of him?"

"He helped us find the Pink Lady when Sirius broke into Hogwarts!"

"He helped?" Noevmber grinned, looking at ease for the first time. "Usually it's 'he tried to help.'"

Harry laughed.

Sirius swept his godson away to show him around while Molly insisted Harry get settled. November returned to her corner before she realized she was not alone in the room. Looking over she saw Remus smirking at her.

"You know he wouldn't let you hide like that."

Novemebr gave him a cocky look. "So you decided to help?"

"I am a very helpful man."

"I was unaware of this," November laughed.

Remus leaned on the counter, his face close to hers, glowing with his usual half smile.

_He __is __so __hot_. The thought flicked into November's mind before she realized what it was. Really? Lupin? Her eyes took him in and she could not say she disagreed with the subconscious thought. Sleeves rolled back to the elbows, shaggy brown hair, that playful smile, and a thin trim body…add a book and he really was the ideal man.

Remus noticed he was being looked over and blushed without knowing why.

"Well, Very Helpful Man, could you manage to help me haul water out to the plants?"

"Ah yes. Glad to employ my rippling muscles."

November laughed as was expected and filled two wooden buckets. Remus carried them out to a very full back porch. He had managed to construct a magical greenhouse of sorts and despite the drawing cold the plants would continue to grow, providing magical remedies and supplies for potions. Remus looked around the greenhouse. He loved it in here, where it was warm, green, and secluded. He turned back to November.

"See, I'm very…" He trailed off. November was watering the plants and something about her had caught his eye.

Maybe it was the way her long dark hair thickened and curled in the heat. Maybe it was the tenderness with which she treated each plant, even though she was really no good with them, or her soft humming. And maybe it was the very low scoop of her shirt, revealing two perfectly rounded breasts. Her thin and willowy form did not lend to huge breasts but Lupin noted they were divine all of the same.

Lupin shook his head reprimanding himself. _She__'__s __your __friend,_ he scolded himself. But a voice in his head piped up: _How __far, __really, __is __friend __from__ '__friendlier__'__?_

November had finished watering the plants and smiled up at him. "I suppose you aren't totally useless after all….You alright?" He looked strained and pink. Must be the heat.

"Just a lot on my mind. I'll leave you to your work then."

"Alright. The alcove?"

He nodded. They didn't even need to say more. Now that there was a whole troop here the hiding place was essential to their sanity.

Taking the stairs two at a time, Lupin's distracted mind was surprised to hear November's name mentioned from Ron's room. He stopped, curious what the students could know that he did not.

"When he died Charlie was really torn up. November moved in for a while to help the family out, but it was mostly for her own sake."

"How did he die?"

_Who __was __this __mysterious__ '__he__'__?_ Remus wondered.

"Not sure. Dad says he stuck his nose in the wrong places. His line of work as an Auror was dangerous enough. But Charlie said he was working on finding magical objects that were supposed to be lost."

"But how can that get you killed?"

"Not sure. November took his notebooks when he died, so she would know if anyone would."

The conversation shifted to other things and Lupin crept away. This was news indeed. An unnamed man had been killed in pursuit of magical objects and November had inherited his notes. She had already told him that she believed the notebooks were connected to her own "death" so somehow it was all connected back to this unnamed male.

* * *

><p>Lupin had finally finished the dishes, enough for about a thousand people, and made a hasty retreat for the alcove. He was looking forward to a calm evening reading with November.<p>

When he entered a book flew at his face with a scream. Remus quickly threw up a shield and stared wide eyed at November. Her face was red and papers were flung around the room. An end table was kicked over and Sir Cadougan was in his painting trying to calm her.

"Did I…" Remus began.

"It doesn't make any sense! There's nothing there!"

November's fury was not wrath, but frustration at her own helplessness. She had kept copious notes on anything that passed through her hands or by her desk in all of her time at the Ministry. It had been a great risk to do so. But none of it, not a single sentence, was enough to get her 'killed.' Secrets, gossip, and dirt, yes. But mysteries, dark secrets, and unknown information, no.

"Please good sir," Sir Cadougan spoke to Lupin. "She will only listen to you. Help the fair lady."

Lupin's mind snapped awake at what the knight said. _She__will__only__listen__to__you_. He had noticed this in small ways but had never given it any weight until now.

"November…" he walked slowly to her as if she were a frightened animal and gently took her in his arms. For a few moments she remained stiff and angry but gradually she relaxed and allowed him to embrace her.

He inhaled the scent of her hair: warm pumpkin spice and cloves. He gently rubbed her back and she snuggled her head against his shoulder.

"Sorry my sleeves are damp," he murmured.

"'sokay," the muffled replay came back. He could tell she was crying but did not mention it. Not every tear needed address.

"November, I would like to assist you? Research is something I am rather skilled at. I also lack familiarity with the contents. Maybe something would strike me in a way it does not strike you."

November debated silently. It seemed to be her burden to bear and to unload it on Lupin…She often got after him for trying to carry too much alone, but her personality combined with whatever trauma lay in her recent past pushed her in the exact opposite direction of openness.

Without speaking, she motioned her papers into a pile and handed the stack to him. He took them, tucking them away into his robe pocket.

She sighed heavily and met his eyes, looked every day of her age. Through the open window, the next door Muggles' music floated into the room. She looked so forlorn and she felt so perfect there in his arms…

November did not resist when Remus began to box step around the room. Indeed, a smile broke through the weary expression.

_Crossing that bridge with lessons I've learned_

_Playing fire and not getting burned _

_I may not know what you're going through_

_But time is the space between me and you_

Neither noticed the clever smile on the knight's face in the painting behind them; both had forgotten he was even there. "Good luck, granddaughter," Sir Cadougan murmured with an elaborate bow before creeping out the painting.

They had shifted to a better dance frame, their hands meeting with a feeling of rightness.

_There is a light through that window_

_Hold on, say yes _

_While people say no_

_Life carries on _

The song rose to a crescendo and Remus spun her out from him. Laughing, November spun back to him.

_When nothing else matters _

_I just don't know what's got into me_

_It's just a prayer for the dying _

_For the dying…_

The song ended and November became aware of how very close they were. Remus had his arm wrapped around her waist and the other held her hand. His cheek rested against her temple, his breath ruffling her hair. She shifted her head so she was looking up into his face.

Remus looked down at the woman who had worked her way into his life and fear pricked him. The look she was giving him…He was too old, too poor, and too dangerous. He dropped her hand and moved away from her quickly. He could read the surprise in her face.

Remus had to this point gone along with whatever feeling had taken hold of him; November inspired that in him. But he had never imagined that it would go this far. That she would want more. He could not allow it.

"I should get started if we are to get anywhere," Remus forced an explanation and hurried out of the room. The door swung shut behind him.

Slowly, November sat down on the couch. What on earth had that been about? Yes, there had been…feelings. But he had run off as if she were on fire. Could there really be something there? She had never seriously considered this possibility and ironically Lupin's sudden distance gave it away more distinctly than the dance itself.

* * *

><p>Within the confines of his room, Lupin was berating himself repeatedly.<p>

"Oh, yes! Keep your distance and then ask her to dance. Hold her close to you and then…"

He slammed his hand on his desk, ignoring the stinging this caused.

"This must remain platonic. You, Remus John Lupin, have no right! You must protect her. If you care at all, you will keep her from you."

Lupin ran a hand through his thick graying hair, and sighed. What he needed was a plan. Something he could do or say when the time came for it…

* * *

><p>Despite his enforced physical distance, their emotional proximity only increased. His new avoidance of touch stood out starkly and drew attention to his motivations. To everyone but November it was already obvious how he felt about her.<p>

November discovered apple trees in the Black backyard one fall afternoon. The kids were getting ready for school and Molly's bustling had driven her outdoors.

Remus was informed of this discovery when his book floated out of his hands and he found November's face directly behind where it had been.

"What do you know about bee keeping?"

Sirius was curled up nearby and looked at her as though she were insane. "What the hell…?"

"Apple trees. But they don't bear fruit without bees. And we have no bees. So we need bee keeping."

Lupin tried to get his mind to kick in again but honestly he just wasn't feeling her 'abruptness' today. He had worked at her notes as well and he was faced with the uncomfortable truth that there was nothing in them of any real weight. Her panic made more sense now and the stress was starting to carry over to him.

Lupin sighed loudly and rubbed his temples. "I don't know, 'Vember."

"But you know everything…" Her voice was pleading and it annoyed him.

"I don't, actually. There are some things I don't know and some things I just don't care about."

His voice sounded sharper than he intended, but he did not apologize. November only looked at him before putting his book down on a side table and leaving quietly. Lupin could feel reproach rolling off of Sirius and he snapped at him. "What?"

"You know it's just the way she is. Don't need to crab at her."

"Maybe I just want to be left alone once in a while…" Remus mumbled, burying himself in his book once again.

Remus did not see November again until dinner and then it was too late to talk to her. With what felt like half the wizarding world in the Black House there was not much he could do until they were alone.

After the dinner was over and the kids were packing up their purchases from Diagon Alley Remus began to seek out November. But she found him first.

"November, I would like to –"

She waved him off. "Whatever you are going to say I say no. I know what the problem is and intend to fix it."

Remus felt annoyed at being cut off but a deeper part of him was amused. This could be very interesting. "What would that be?"

"We're going out! Hogsmeade! I have not had butterbeer for far too long and you are turning into a shut in."

"But you can't be seen."

"No one will be looking for me. I'm dead."

Remus wanted to object that he should stay in as well but he did not want to explain why that might be. And she was right as usual. He hadn't been _out_ in a very long time. The house seemed to be closing in on him and it made him very irritable.

November's face lit up. She could tell she was going to win this one. He had a weakness for her schemes. "Get a sweater!"

A Floo burst later and they were in the warm wood walls of Hogsmeade. Rosmerta jumped, Floo not being the usual means of arrival. "'Ello! Can I help you?"

"A pitcher of butterbeer!" November exclaimed raucously, grinning and sporting her fire red hair.

"A pitcher? There's two of us!" Remus was disbelieving.

"I can hold my butterbeer. Can _you_?" she teased.

Remus sighed but his usual smile was there.

The pitcher was brought with a pair of mugs. They agreed on a corner booth, by the street view window but out of sight from the street itself.

November was unusually silent as she drank her butterbeer. Her eyes took in all of the street view they could get. She had begun to feel as though she had memorized every knot hole in the Black House. New scenery was so welcome…she could feel the effects of getting out in her soul.

"I wish Padfoot were here," Remus murmured more to himself. He was surprised to see November nod, understanding.

"You know?"

"Enough. You forget, I work with Mad-Eye who's worse than a yenta and I _was_ in school with you. You guys weren't exactly discrete."

Remus blushed, wondering just how good her memory was regarding his own nickname. "I see."

"Must be hell. Being stuck in a place you hate. In some ways," November's voice lowered, "I'm almost glad the flat was exploded."

Remus was curious about this but he assumed she would volunteer the information when she wanted him to know. "I was looking for old pictures of you."

November's attention was immediately caught. "Oh really? Hoping to see the former glory?"

Remus smiled and blushed again. She had been one of the many pretty younger girls. Seeing the pictures of her had reminded him of a few moments with her here and there.

"It jogged some Prefect memories. Do you remember the sludge fiasco?"

"Merlin!" November laughed. "Of course I do! You and I got stuck moping down someone's attempt to glue their friend to a wall."

"And you slipped-"

"Because you yanked me down! Some Head Boy!" Her expression softened. "I had forgotten about that until now…I used to have the biggest crush on you. From a distance obviously."

Remus was stunned. It never occurred to him that someone would ever have been interested in him, past or present. He knew of a few girls here and there who had fancied him but he assumed it was limited to them alone. It also occurred to him that this was the conversational opening he had been hoping for.

"Well, you escaped fortunately."

November was surprised. "Why fortunate?"

"Well, for starters it never could have gone anywhere."

November felt a bit sick. Could he really be serious? After all the time together and the dance?

Remus continued, not able to meet her eyes anymore. "I find that I am a poor match for any woman. And now I'm too old and too poor to start a love affair." He tried to lighten the mood. "I find close friends to be much more satisfactory and more valuable than words can express. Like you."

November forced her face muscles to smile, deliberately trying to hide her disappointment. But what was she upset about? He had never promised her anything and she and never even seen him with a woman who wasn't married or a student. Maybe this was normal Lupin behavior? She distinctly remembered Sirius and James being that way. But she remembered Lupin so differently. That was what she had liked about him…

"What else did you remember?" she asked, hoping to lead into different territory.

The night passed calmly and after initial awkwardness of Lupin's 'confession' they settled into the now comfortable, if not repressed, roles of very close friends. The butterbeer soaked through to what felt like their bones.

It was very late before they returned to the Black House, tipsy and cozy feeling. The troll leg umbrella stand was immediately knocked over, which elicited loud shushing and giggling from the pair. When they had finally righted everything and crept upstairs, Lupin stopped at November's door to 'see her off.'

"It was a good idea, 'Vember," Lupin murmured.

"Glad you liked it." She was giving him that look again and it made the warmth in him increase.

November knew that after a statement like what she had received from Lupin that night she should not provoke him. But in her less-inhibited state she could not resist one push against the walls he was trying to build between them. Stepping close to him she slowly kissed her fingertips and gently placed the fingertips against his own lips.

"Good night, Remus Lupin."

The door closed and she was gone.

* * *

><p><em>Next chapter: the identity of our mystery man and the appearance of Lucius Malfoy and his role in all of this!<em>

_As always, I love reviews and reviewers get a section of the coming chapter!_


	4. Chapter 4: Miss Helena

**Chapter 4: Miss Helena**

An exclusive Ministry event had been announced and it was clear that the potential for Death Eater activity would be enormous. While everyone's attention was diverted to the event, the Death Eaters could slip by unnoticed.

This led to the next problem: of course Dumbledore would be there, but all other Order members would be noticeable and out of place there. All except for Remus and November.

* * *

><p>As Remus pulled a sweater over his head, someone knocked on the door to his bedroom. He was surprised to see November there when he answered it. She had avoided his room since they had cleaned the house all those months ago.<p>

"Favor, kind sir?"

"You've been talking to your grandfather again haven't you? Come in."

"Maybe," November passed Remus, keeping a slight distance from him. There had been a silent agreement of distance since the trip to Hogsmeade. November knew the proxy kiss had been pushing it and Remus was ashamed to admit how much he wished things had gone further.

"What's the favor?" Remus pulled up a chair for her and perched on the edge of his bed.

November pulled scissors out of her pocket, long and sharp. "I need someone to cut my hair."

"Molly…?"

"Is out. She took them to the station today."

"Ah yes…Sirius…?"

"Is drunk as hell. He'll take my ear off. It's for tonight, for the Ministry thing." One look at his face made it clear to her that Remus did not want to be involved. "Forget it. I can-"

"It's not that," he interrupted. "I just…your hair is so lovely and if I messed it up I would never forgive myself!"

"You can't though. It's so thick! It just needs to be here." She indicated somewhere halfway down her upper arm, a good six inches shorter.

Remus combed his own hair out of his eyes. "You cannot hate me if I ruin it then. Turn around."

"Oh thank you!" Pulling a brush out of her pocket, November began to brush out the thick brown strands. "I don't trust magical cuts. This is much better."

"We'll see." Remus's pocket handkerchief was transfigured into a cape and draped around her shoulders.

Cautiously taking hold of a section of hair, he gently measured out the right amount and made the first cut. November began to giggle and he immediately jumped back.

"What?"

"I was just thinking how funny it would be if I screamed or something. But I thought you might stab me. And I would probably deserve it."

"Wench! You certainly would!' But he lightly tapped her nose and smiled down at her.

After some silence, broken only by the snip of scissors, November decided to pose a question that had tumbled around her mind for a while. "Remus, why did you teach?"

"Sorry?"

"Why did you teach?"

He paused in his cutting. He knew he could trust her but was now really the time to 'break the news'? Another day would be more suitable, when fewer sharp things were around.

"I enjoy teaching. I enjoy the freshness of minds that are interested in learning and I enjoy giving students what they need to survive in our darkening world."

"So you wanted Dark Arts?"

"It was what I enjoyed most as a boy at Hogwarts and something I feel I am fairly good at."

"I always pictured you as a book tester or librarian," November teased gently.

"Jobs of interest no doubt. But I wanted to teach."

"I admire that. I have no patience and you are all patience. And they knew that about you too."

Again Remus stopped cutting to look at her. "How do you know _that_?"

"The Weasleys have been spilling their secrets to me since before they were Hogwarts students, m'dear," she answered with a sophisticated air.

Remus smiled to himself; it was a compliment indeed and considering his current position – essentially barred from teaching – it would be a treasured one.

"How have you known the Weasleys for so long? They were all above and below our years."

"Titus…" The name was a breath and Remus knew instantly this was the mystery man, the dead man the Boggart had impersonated.

"He was…?"

"My fiancé."

Remus had not been expecting that. The scissors slipped and he nicked his finger. "You're engaged?"  
>"I was. He's dead. Has been for some time."<p>

The haircut was finished and Remus shook off the cape before taking her hands in his own. Her mouth twitched spastically and she squeezed his hands tightly.

"Sorry. I doubt my misfortunes are of any interest to anyone," she mumbled, not meeting his eyes.

"On the contrary. I have been curious for some time but it is hardly polite conversation to ask."

With a shaky breath November began in one long flow of words: "Titus Freyson was a Hufflepuff and the sweetest man I ever met. He invented charms for the Ministry. I was assigned to test them. That's how we met. He was younger than me and Charlie Weasley was his closest friend. Titus was killed by Death Eaters five years ago. I moved in with the Weasleys 'to help around the house' but largely because Charlie knew I had been cut from the Auror program. It was too much trying to grieve and study. Arthur found me a position as a secretary in the Ministry. He was able to pull strings since we are both Pure Blood families and had me situated under Mad-Eye. I resumed Titus's research – he believed that there were rare magical objects that the Death Eaters wanted and were just floating around – and was killed, same as him. Mad-Eye found me in a park in Canterbury after I survived my death and brought me here."

"Your ring. It's from him then?"

November nodded. "I can't even look at the engagement ring. But this he gave to me the day before he died." The pearly silver ring shone up at the pair.

They sat in silence for some time before Remus spoke. "Thank you."  
>"For what?" She looked shocked.<p>

"For trusting me with something so personal as loss."

Their eyes met and he wrapped her in a tight hug.

"I haven't told anyone that story since I started working for Mad-Eye," she spoke into his shoulder.

"How long ago was that?"

"Five years."

Remus knew at that moment that he had to tell her what he was and soon. If she trusted him with so much, he could not refuse her his own secret.

* * *

><p>"The two of you need to get going!" Arthur's voice echoed up the stairwell to Remus and November's rooms.<p>

Remus hurried down at the warning. New dress robes had been gotten for him, against his protests, and they were perfection. He had combed his hair back out of his face and it hung to the sides, showing the carved features of his face. A groomed five 'o clock shadow added to the effect, making him very attractive almost in spite of himself.

"Look at you," teased Sirius, ribbing him roughly. "How could November resist?"

"What about me?"

Remus looked up toward her voice on the stairs and tried not to gape. Her hair was back to red and had been done in some sort of twist to the side of her head. The rest hung in ringlets down her shoulder. But the dress was the real sight, low and scooping in backless black satin. The back, chest, and throat were covered in a sheer black with silver stitch work swirls working through them and down the side of the dress.

"Wow." Sirius took her hand to help her down the stairs. "I mean really wow, 'Vember."

Molly bustled into the room and cooed over the dress. Grabbing Remus she placed him next to November. "Don't they look the perfect couple, Arthur?"

November went scarlet and tried to hide behind her hair. Sirius sniggered and Arthur tried to think of a way to change the topic.

"You should probably change my face," Remus offered feebly.

"Indeed." She coughed and began. But right before her wand pointed at him Remus saw a glint in her eye, sharp and cold.

The sensation was always bizarre and he had begun to guess what he would look like based on the feel of it all. He could feel his skin tighten and his jaw square out. Someone younger, which was never a sad change, Remus thought.

When she had finished, Molly gasped aloud. "My dear, are you sure that's wise?"

"Let them look their ghosts in the eyes. It's the least they deserve."

Remus turned to face the mirror and was greeted with the face of the dead man from the Boggart's shape. He was her fiancé. Meeting her eyes he understood her purpose: he had reminded her why she was here and it had sparked her spite.

"It's not him anyway. It's still Remus. They could never place either one of them based on this."

"Well then, here are your ID papers and tags. Remus you're the photographer; try to take pictures of anything that could be of use. November, you're our new lead journalist for human interest. It should give you both enough room to poke around without too much attention."

November and Remus placed the Daily Prophet papers and tags in pockets and clipped to clothes.

"Figure out your story and stick to it," Arthur continued. "Whatever seems natural enough. Now get going!"

The couple was ushered out and into the night. They began to walk down the street, needing to get out of the Muggle crowded street before they could Apparate.

"I'll go by Helena –" November began once out of earshot of the Muggles.

"Your middle name."

November smiled at her companion. "You remember everything."

"Well, you told me."

"Only once!"

She could have sworn she saw a pink glow to his cheeks but it could have also been the cold air.

"Then I'll go by John, my own middle name. Should be easy enough."

Pausing they added their 'names' to the tags they wore. John Fforde and Helena Everdeen.

"I need you to promise me something," November said abruptly in a very serious voice.  
>"Any thing at all," Remus answered without a pause.<p>

Her heart fluttered. If only.

"Should you notice me trapped with some crazy person, drunk, or overly sexual male, please save me by any means necessary!"

Remus let out a loud barking laugh. "Is this a serious concern?"

"Completely! I attract them and I do not know why! You must promise!"

"I swear on my life I would save you from a million men." He delivered the words with a silly air that covered half of their conversations, but he felt it more deeply than he would admit.

"Shall we?" 'Helena' held her hand out to him.

There was a crack and they were gone.

* * *

><p>The ball was good enough, though neither took much interest in the event itself. Their eyes were for two purposes: 1) scouting out any activity that could be useful and 2) each other.<p>

"They must work together often. Look at how he stares at her," one witch whispered as Remus passed by her.

November was better at playing the socialite but her glances were not as rare as she would have herself believed.

Some information was gathered in the overhearing of conversations and legitimately interesting stories were gathered by November; she almost wished she were really writing this story for the Prophet.

The time drew on them to disappear and scout out the unoccupied areas of the Ministry.

Unfortunately, a rather grabby middle aged wizard had cornered November out of Remus's vision. She had been trapped by him for the better part of fifteen minutes when November finally gave up and sent a Patronus after Remus. It was not subtle but it would not be out of place; she had seen it done by others in the same situation.

She was completely unaware that this was the chance another wizard had been waiting for.

* * *

><p>The silvery owl caught Remus's attention quickly. "Hey! Why don't you make good on that promise you dope!" it hissed at him in November's voice before evaporating away. Glancing around he made out November on the far side of the room. He began toward her, but half way across the room he froze. The sight before him nearly stopped his heart.<p>

* * *

><p>"Ah, dearest. I was wondering where you had gone."<p>

At first the silky voice did not register with November; she was just glad someone had taken pity on her. But as the hand took her own and she followed it up to the face of the owner she would have gladly gone back to Mr. Octopus (as she had dubbed him in her mind).

Lucius Malfoy returned her gaze evenly. He wore silvery robes embroidered in black, which matched hers as if they had planned this. His long white blonde hair hung in a loose but very neat ponytail. He was stunning as always, like a hooded viper.

Lucius slipped an arm around her tenderly and kissed the crook of her neck affectionately. Goosebumps broke out on her skin and she fought the reflex to jump away. The other wizard balked and stammered.

"You will excuse us I'm sure," Malfoy drawled before gently leading November away.

* * *

><p>Remus felt alternating waves of sick panic and hot anger as he watched Lucius lead November to the dance floor. This was multiple levels of bad. The goal had been to not attract any attention let alone the attentions of a head Death Eater!<p>

Remus was in fits. He could not stay here and just stare at her; it was too obvious. But to leave her alone with that vulture… He headed quickly out into the hall. He would wait some time here and then go back.

Besides, the sight of them together made him want to put his wand through Lucius's eye.

* * *

><p>November had never been a good dancer but Lucius was an excellent lead.<p>

"Forgive me, but I saw you could use the assistance," he said, taking November's hand in his. His hands were large and rough, which surprised her.

"I appreciate the rescue, Mr. Malfoy." November forced herself to sound charming. If she played this right it could help them all in the future and it was worth the discomfort.

"Not mister. You make me sound old and distant," he smiled easily at her. How much older than her was he anyway? She was clearly younger, but not _so_ much younger.

"Then what shall I call you?" November forced herself to maintain eye contact. Dark witches did not stare at the floor and that was exactly what she would have to be for the remainder of her time with him. She straightened and her demeanor changed from laughing charm to proud charm.

"Lucius? A man lucky enough to see you again?"

November could not stop herself from blushing; she was still herself no matter how she pretended.

"Perhaps too forward," Lucius backtracked smoothly. "Let us begin with your name."  
>"Put your mind at rest on that count," she purred, feeling ill. "I am Helena Everdeen."<p>

"Lovely." His hand moved from her waist to her back, pulling her subtly closer to him. She realized that the danger in Lucius Malfoy was not what she had long thought. The danger was that he was genuinely charming, that if he wanted you to like him it would be hard to resist. "Your robes are conveniently similar to my dress. How might that have happened?"

Lucius smiled at the playfulness in her tone. "Quick transfiguration was perfectly satisfactory. I thought it might lend to the credibility of the lie. You are here with the Prophet?"  
>"Quite astute. You use your eyes well."<p>

"You put them to good use."

November decided to try a different approach. Winning his favor was one thing, but giving him reason to seek her out was dangerous. If she could offend him just enough maybe she could get away in one piece. "Your attention seems an easy creature to catch, _Lucius_. What value could I possibly give that?"

The dance ended but it was clear he wanted to stay with her. She allowed herself to be lead toward the center of the room.

"My attention is not so easy to catch. You have had it for some time."

"Shallow attention it must be then," she replied quickly. "You cannot possibly have good intentions."

"Not so bad as you might think."

"That is not what I am accustomed to hearing. Past accusations might attest to that as well."

Lucius stepped menacingly toward her and she realized she had crossed a line; this was a Ministry event and no time to provoke his anger.

November needed to regain the favor he had expressed. Taking a deep breath, she closed the distance between them, her body pressed to his. She was tall for a woman and it was to her benefit, as their faces were now quite close.

"Not that I mind the thought," she added in an undertone. "I appreciate…_strength of will_ and _dedication to a cause_ in a man."

Lucius caught what she was hinting at quickly. "And yet your job – "

"Is a perfect way to gather what I might need to know."

"And the man watching you all evening?"

"A jealous co-worker." At least that was not a lie. The thought made her stomach ache.

Lucius seemed to be appraising her, and the feeling made her hair stand on end.

"I have business to attend to this evening or I would ask the privilege of continuing this conversation elsewhere. How might I contact you?"

"Not easily I am afraid." She had meant to sound regretful and it came out as seductive. She kicked herself inwardly.  
>"Tell me. It is well worth the effort if I may see you again." A smile played on his lips. This woman was quite something. She had a fast quip for anything he might say and her manner was inviting to say the least. If she was really be what she claimed in regard to her allegiances she would be ideal.<p>

Pulling him closer to her November spoke into his ear, allowing her lips to brush the side of his neck. "Severus Snape."

Heat erupted from where her lips had grazed and swooped across his body.

She moved a few paces back from him. "I am afraid I cannot help you more than that. My location must be kept quiet for the benefit of our cause." She curtsied hurriedly and disappeared into the remaining people.

Lucius was left in a hazy testosterone cloud; he would find her and he would bed her. She would be a challenge and a rewarding conquest, of that he was certain. He must speak to Severus the following day.

* * *

><p>Remus was relieved to see November hurrying out of the main room. She was shaking when she reached him however.<p>

"Are you okay?"

"We're in public. I'm fine."

"What did he want?"

"You know perfectly well. He's a single man now."

"What did you-?" His words were cut off as November grabbed his lapels with unexpected strength. A push slammed his back against the wall and she shoved her face in his.

"I have no interest in talking about what I did or did not do, Remus John Lupin. You will not ask me again. It makes me sick enough to just _think_ about it."

She let go of him and took off down the hall again. Remus was shocked. That was a much more violent reaction than he would have ever suspected from her. Something had gone wrong…

They ducked into an elevator and punched the level for the Department of Mysteries.

Reaching into a pocket of her dress November pulled out their street clothes. "Change," she ordered, handing them to Remus.

"Here?" They weren't supposed to change until they left; the current dress should have been disguise enough for the time.

"Yes. We've been compromised."

"You mean…Lucius?"

She looked like she was going to hit him again. Regardless, Remus could see it for what it was: something was bothering her and she was lashing out. It was easier to feed on anger than face what was upsetting her for the current time.

"We may need Helena Everdeen yet. It would be best not to tarnish her image," November answered. While it was still veiled, Remus felt as if he had swallowed a boulder. "And I'll not risk you by your connection to her."

Her hand slipped into his and he could feel her shaking. She had been running on adrenaline and now was crashing. Impulsively he hugged her close.

"I swore to protect you from a million men and I meant it," he comforted.

November soaked up the moment, in his arms, protected by him. She finally pushed away. "We need to change."

Changing in the elevator together could have been more exciting had both of them not been strung so tight. Everything hinged on them not being recognized either as themselves or as their fake identities now. There were only so many faces and names they could remember.

The elevator stopped and the doors whispered open.

"I think we should go as ourselves," November whispered. "Assuming we aren't seen it won't matter. But if we are it should throw them off and we are both hard to find."

Remus agreed and a moment later his face was his own. Red hair darkened to brown and he was looking at his beautiful friend again.

They crept down the passage, wands out. Voices were plain by the Department door, but it was impossible to catch who they were. Reaching the end of the passage they could clearly see Death Eater robes but faces were masked. The figures discussed the fortifications on the Department and dispersed.

After all of the fuss upstairs, it was very anticlimactic. The pair sat in the shadows for the better part of an hour before deciding that no more was to happen that night. They crept out of the ministry to the Floo and after seeing no one near, transported back home.

In the warmth of the kitchen, the night seemed unreal. Molly stopped her bread making and hurried over to them.

"Any news dears?"

Remus turned to November. She looked sick. She spun her ring distractedly on her finger.

"Afraid not. Saw a meeting but nothing eventful. Did not inform as to _what_ they want but they clearly want something. We will go through it all tomorrow at the meeting."

"Well at least you got to go to a wonderful party! Are you alright, dear?" Molly turned her attentions to November.

"She was a bit ill when we left I'm afraid," Remus lied quickly. "I'll make sure she gets straight to bed."

November squeezed his hand gratefully.

"Very well. We won't wake the two of you until later."

Good nights were said and the pair climbed. But neither headed for bed. Both mutually knew that this was a time for the alcove if there ever was one.

November said not a word as Remus reclined on the pouffy couch. She simply curled up against him, her head against his shoulder and body resting against his own. His arms encircled her and worked their way through her thick hair.

"That feels good," she murmured sleepily.

He continued to work through her hair for some time when she broke the silence again.

"What are we, Remus?"

"Pardon?"

"What are we?"

The question was at the heart of the last week, this very evening, and the future. But what answer could he give her? Could he allow his jealousy and desire overturn his common sense? She still did not know what he really was…

"We're friends, 'Vember."

She nodded against his stomach. "That's what I thought."

* * *

><p>The next day was spent mostly in avoidance of each other. The evening before was too sharp and real. It threw too much light on their feelings for each other, feelings which must be put away for a variety of reasons, or at least so it seemed.<p>

Night came and the meeting began with the meal. When Severus arrived in time for dessert, November's heart hit the floor. The look he gave her made her position very clear.

"What news do you bring, Severus?" Dumbledore asked pointedly.

"I have a rather interesting request from Lucius Malfoy."

There were whispers on all sides and she could feel Remus stiffen beside her.

"What might that request be?"

"A date with Miss November," Snape sneered, barely hiding his mockery.

There was an outburst and November seriously considered the value of Apparating the hell out of there. But Remus's hand in her own calmed her and she interlocked her fingers with his.

Dumbledore looked unruffled however.

"It would appear our November caught his attentions quite accidentally last evening as a Miss Helena Everdeen. After pursuing her he was finally able to find some contact point to her, though she was very secretive. This happened to be myself." Snape looked November squarely in the eyes through his entire account, talking to her alone though he spoke to the room.

"He asked me this morning about this Helena and after a physical description it was clear who had caught his eye. I explained 'Helena' is in hiding for the Dark Lord's cause and I could act for him in asking her to dinner with him. I added it may take a few requests as she is quite coy."

"And what the hell did you do that for?" Sirius barked, furious. "You know very well that would only spike his interest!"

"Oh, November seems to have done that just fine on her own." His lips curled as he spoke.

Dumbledore held up a hand to silence the room. "November, would you kindly recount the events of last night?"

Slowly and clearly, November recited every gory detail. The room was silent when she finished.

"Severus has acted as I assumed he would," she finished, sounding weary. "He has verified that Helena is a Dark Witch and has made it clear that she may or may not even respond. The ball is completely in my court. Or ours, as the case may be. I acted under the assumption that this interest may be useful to us in the future."

She looked straight at Snape. "Believe me, it gives me no pleasure."

Remus spoke without thinking. "But surely you won't?"

November only turned to look at Dumbeldore. He gazed at her in return, non-threatening and absorbing.

"This is something to consider indeed. Remus's account of the Death Eater activity combined with Lucius's own comments gives us good reason to think he could be key to their plans. However, this must not be ventured lightly. He is a dangerous man and a false relationship with him, however brief, would be exceptionally dangerous. I commend your quick thinking and ask that you give no answer for the time being."

Relieved, November nodded. It was as though a weight had been lifted from her. Conversation resumed with Molly loudly declaring anything of the sort was much too dangerous.

* * *

><p>November laughed behind her hand as Remus concluded the story of how he ended up being chased by hexed books in his fifth year.<p>

"You have the oddest tales!" she tried to muffle her laugh. They were outside her room and the rest of the house was asleep.

"I had odd friends," he shrugged, with an easy grin.

A comfortable silence settled on them. Remus had been thinking over what he would say to her since the night before. His answer of "friends" had been less than satisfactory and both knew it.

"November…"

"Yes?" Her wide eyes were luminous and she took a step closer to him.

"I was not completely honest with you last night."

Her heart skipped a beat. Where was he going with this?

"You are not simply a friend. You are my closest friend in this miserable place. I…adore you. I do." He took her hands in his own. "Promise me you will not keep things from me. Were something to come between us…it would kill me."  
>"But if anything happens with Lucius, it will only hurt you to know. Like last night." November could not help but feel that it was odd to be having this conversation though the issue at hand – their feelings for each other – had never been addressed. It was present and fully real but neither would admit to it for a host of reasons.<p>

"I would rather know. I would rather die of anger at Lucius Malfoy than not be there for you when you needed me."

Their faces were so very close.

"I promise," she breathed.

He took a shaky step back, not wanting to move away from her. "Good night, 'Vember."

The moment he was out of hearing she answered him. "Good night…my love."

* * *

><p><em>Yet another appology for the long time in coming! Break is more busy than the normal work year! <em>

_As always please review! I'm dying for some feedback! :-)_


	5. Chapter 5: Full Moon

**Chapter 5: Full Moon**

_I suppose you could call this chapter AU depending on how you feel about the whole werewolf transformation process in the books vs. in this. However, considering the amount of AU everywhere else I hope it will not be too off-putting. :-)_

* * *

><p>"Sirius?"<p>

The shaggy man looked up from the message he had been working on. The Order had come across some coded messages and they had promptly been given to Sirius to work on.

"Have you seen Remus?"

Sirius grinned at her. "Can't go a moment without him can you?"

But November did not respond and only looked at him distractedly. This worried Sirius; November would gladly fight back against any tease unless something was wrong.

"What's the matter?" he asked, giving her his full attention now.

"It's almost one in the afternoon…" she answered, her voice sounding unfocused.

Her worries began to come together in Sirius's mind. "And you haven't seen him out of his room?"

"No…"

Almost as one person the pair bounded up the stairs.

"Remus!" Sirius banged on his friend's door. "Moony!"

There was a moan from within. Impatient, November shoved Sirius aside and flung open the door. She gasped aloud and flew to Remus's side.

Lupin lay on the floor and judging by the way the covers were yanked about and piled on top of him it was clear he had tried to leave the bed and fallen. He was shaking and shivering, though his body was damp with fever. Luckily, he was clothed and Sirius quickly helped November lift him Remus back into his bed.

November neatly summoned a washcloth and shot cold water onto it from her wand. She mopped Remus's face off, refusing to let him speak until she had finished. Of course Sirius had seen this "ailment" before and he was well aware that night was the full moon, but Severus's potions had kept Lupin tame for so long that Sirius had almost forgotten how violent the transformation could be.

November tended Remus for a full two hours, finally lulling Remus into a sleep after the first half an hour. But there was nothing she could do for Remus and the pains returned even stronger than before. The futility of it all angered Sirius and he finally decided enough was enough.

He lifted her up from Remus's bedside and sighed heavily, meeting her eyes. "November, he's-"

"Going to tell her himself," Remus rasped out. The pains had gone down for the moment. "Give us some privacy?"

Sirius nodded, relieved it would soon all be out in the open and shut the door behind him, but not wandering too far away. If the situation soured he wanted to be available.

Remus's golden eyes flitted around November's face before resting in her gaze.

"I have very shamefully not been as honest with you as you have been with me, November."

He tried to read her but she only looked at him, her face showing only attentiveness.

He took a deep breath and continued his confession. "I am a werewolf. Tonight will be the full moon. Since my youth this curse," he broke eye contact with her, "has driven so many away and harmed so many others. I will understand if you would prefer to disassociate from me. You would not be the first."

There was a very long, tense silence. Remus felt sick in multiple ways and could not stand it anymore. He looked over to November and was met with the shock of his life.

Tears were pouring down her angular face and the look she gave him was one of deep empathy.

"I know, Remus. I've known since our first watch together. And I'm so sorry. No one deserves this less than you."

He was too stunned to respond. She had known? All this time? So her affection had been with full knowledge of what he was? This changed everything. This opened up possibilities he could not have dreamed of. His square hand gently wiped tears off of her face, his own tears starting to fall.

"Thank you, November."

* * *

><p>Unfortunately these were some of the last words he was able to manage that evening. The battle with the inner creature had begun and the pain exploded, drowning out thought and words.<p>

November stayed with him until Sirus finally forced her physically out of the room.

"You can't be there when it happens, 'Vember! He'll kill you!"

"And what of you?" she screamed at him, furious at being overpowered.

He gave her a long look before shifting into the form of a large black dog. Not the biggest revelation of the day, November rubbed her eyes and murmured "Padfoot" under her breath.

He shifted back to a man's body and reached a hand toward her.

"Of course you're a damn Animagus!" She shoved him hard and stormed down the hall. She yelled back at him as she jogged down the stairs, "Is there any way to help him? To make it easier? This could do damage by itself!"

Sirius looked uncomfortable. "Only one thing I know of."

She stopped on the stairs. "Yes?"  
>"Severus Snape. There's a potion that will leave Moony calm and in his right mind. He's always provided it before. I don't know why he has not this time."<p>

Sirius could almost see the thoughts floating above her head as her eyes widened and then her face hardened.

"Don't even-" he began, lunging for her.

November was back in her rooms with a loud crack. A few fast charms on the door left Sirius locked out, but this did not stop him from hurling himself against the door repeatedly.

"November! Don't do anything stupid! November!"

Amist the chorus of groaning from the floor below and shouting from her door, November forced herself to focus. Her hair would have to be red and she could not do this without a clear mind; she had actually set her hair on fire once when distracted. Breathing deeply, she watched as red seeped through her thick hair. As soon as it had finished she began to change.

Sirius was in mid leap when the spell hit him. He landed with a thud, body frozen. A very sad and very suggestively dressed November looked down on him. "I'm sorry, Sirius. But I have to try. I love him."

She unfroze him and Sirius stood quickly. But she held up a hand to caution him. "If you try to stop me I will bind you and drop you in the attic. And if you tell Remus what I said, you will have boils the size of quarters. Understand?"

Sirius knew he had lost. She would do this with or without him so it may as well be with. He hugged her tightly and kissed the top of her head. "Why not just tell him, 'Vember?"

Her eyes were sad as she looked up at him. "Maybe I will when I return."

There was a loud crack and she was gone.

* * *

><p>November had expected better defenses around Malfoy Manor but at the same time it was probably assumed you would not be here unless you needed to be. She pulled the door open and entered.<p>

The hall was cold, decorated in white and silver and shadow. This seemed to represent what she knew of the Malfoys. She shivered and tugged at the sleeves of her dress. Of course the damn thing had long sleeves but a low neck and tiny skirt. That made sense, right?

Footsteps broke her sarcastic musings though. She looked up to find two male Death Eaters.

"I wish to speak to Severus Snape," she ordered, straightening and deciding it was better to take initiative rather than wait to be asked or told what to do.

"Can't, luv. His time is given by Lucius Malfoy."

"Malfoy or not, our lord will be more than a little annoyed to have his own mission put at risk for scheduling details," November clipped. She let her natural anger at the situation rise in her, powering her words with a confidence she did not feel.

From the top of the grand staircase in front of her, just out of sight, a pale eyebrow jumped up on Lucius Malfoy's forehead. He had not expected this; what a welcome surprise.

The second Death Eater stepped a bit closer to November. She hid her fear with feigned disgust. "M'lady, I'm sure we could work you in, assuming you aren't above certain favors."

"Bring your 'favor' any closer to me and you'll be missing it," she hissed back. She had deliberately left her wand behind to look non-hostile but she could still do some damage without it.

"That's a threat, isn't it?" the first sneered.

"Indeed it is." There was a cat like grin and a swift flick of the wrist.

November was fortunate in her timing; she anticipated the hex and threw a reflecting shield around herself. The hex bounced off to the second Death Eater who went limp and began to twitch in fits.

"You will bring me Severus Snape!" November commanded as firmly as she could.

"I would do as she says," drawled a voice on the stairs behind the lackey; this seemed like the right moment to "save the day."

The hex was lifted and the Death Eaters withdrew quickly, grumbling they'd never seen her before and how should they know.

"Lucius," November purred, feigning a slight curtsy when he reached her. She shuddered a little as his eyes roamed over her tightly clad body.

"Of all the intrusions I expected, this is a most pleasant surprise," he kissed her hand lightly, holding her gaze the whole time.

"Less pleasant for me, I am afraid. I must speak to Severus Snape."

"He is quite busy."

"This is a matter of my own safety and the secrecy of my position."

"For the Dark Lord?"

"But of course. I thought I made that clear enough."

Lucius looked into her eyes. There seemed to be no lie there.

"What is the urgency?"

"My werewolf is ill. Severus has supplied him with potions in the past and I must have one now."

Lucius was surprised. "You keep such company?"

"As do you. Anyway, I prefer the element of danger in a man," November murmured, pressing her breasts against him while holding his gaze.

"So you chase after half-breeds?"

November could not prevent the flush that colored her cheeks, but she could change the way it would be perceived. "You insult me much, Mr. Malfoy." She withdrew, standing a meter away from him and glowering.

"Now Helena," his voice was consoling as he moved behind her and gently gathered all of her hair over one shoulder. "I never meant to insult."

"I would think it should be perfectly…" she lost her train of thought as Malfoy gently traced his hand along the bare curve of her neck, "clear what sort of man I desire."

"True enough," Lucius rumbled next to her ear. "But why suppress the transformation? Loose him on Muggles!"

November fought to stay in character and not smack him. She whirled on him angrily. "That would be most inopportune if one were trying to stay undercover. Perhaps I would follow your suggestions if I did not mind throwing away years of work."

Lucius laughed gently. "No need to take offence, Helena. You are right enough. Severus is indeed busy but I suppose I could make an exception for _you_. Through here, please."

After a series of rooms Lucius motioned for her to wait in front of heavy wood paneled doors. He left the door ajar as he slipped into the room and November could hear him speaking.

"You have a visitor, Snape."

"Surely you are not serious. The Dark Lord knows well enough that I – "

"Oh, not him."

The door was opened and November was led into the room. It was fortunate that Lucius was fastening the door when Snape first saw her. His eyes bulged and he visibly started. He had not expected her at all. But he was a very clever man and he quickly realized something serious must surely be behind this visit.

It was also fortunate that she could not see the look Lucius gave Snape over her head. It was a look that revealed his intentions towards her too clearly.

"I must have the potion, Snape," her voice was commanding but not distant, which would give them away as actors rather than friends.

"Potion for…?"

"Lyco_. It is the full moon tonight."

"Ah…I cannot help you."

November's anger became real and she gave vent to it. "What the hell do you mean? You have provided this for him every other time." She slammed her hand into a heavy table, quickly regretting it as her hand throbbed.

"I have had my own orders from the Dark Lord, Helena. These orders have kept me rather busy as of late and your needs have not been my top priority."

November wilted inwardly. She could not argue with that; Snape endangered himself on a regular basis for them and he could not risk this for Remus Lupin.

"And what would you propose?" she hissed at him. "The Shrieking Shack?"

"You know as well as I that the Dark Lord would be livid to find a werewolf in one of his homes." There was an emphasis on the last half of what he said and November started a little. That was huge. "You will just have to charm him in," Severus continued. "You know you are capable of this."

"I was hoping you might be of more use."

"I am sorry to disappoint."

November was halfway to the door when Snape changed his mind. "Helena, one moment."

She stopped, playing up her annoyance.

"Lucius, might we have a private word?"

"Of course."

When the heavy doors were closed, Snape's hand clamped around November's arm and dragged her close to him. "What do you think you are doing here?"

"Remus could die, Severus. He looks horrible and-"

"And you decided to come looking for me here? What makes you think you can get out of here alive?"

She dropped his gaze and he knew. "November, that's –"

She yanked her arm out of his grip. "Oh, burn up! You've never even liked me. What do you care?"

Once she was out in the hall, Lucius kept close to her, a hand resting lightly on her mid back. "I am sorry that you were not able to receive what you came for."

"That does happen," she clipped, still furious at the lack of results.

"You handle disappointment much better than most of us," Lucius smiled, pulling her to a stop on the stairs and holding her shoulders loosely in his hands.

"If you expect me to throw a fit and scream like Bellatrix you will be sorely disappointed. I have my answer and, unfortunately, I must leave as soon as possible. I have a werewolf to hide."

Lucius gently rubbed her arm and shoulder. "Of course. I would not suppose that you have given my request much thought with this weighing on your mind?"

"I have given it thought." November forced herself to change her tone and moved closer to him, looking up at him through her eyelashes. "But must I give my answer this night?"

"I have taken considerable risk in letting you see Severus and allowing you into my home unquestioned. Surely this is worth a simple meal?"

The message was clear; she would have to pay for her favors. But this she had expected.

"I thought it might be well so long before I left my home, Lucius." She rested her hand lightly on his hip and he responded by moving closer to her.

A smile broke across Lucius's face. "You are a terrible minx. But I must have an answer, my dear. You are far too beautiful to lose a second time."

November looked him directly in the eyes and gave her answer.

* * *

><p>The front door slammed and Sirius took the steps in huge bounds to get down to November. Loud cries of pain reached her ears and she shook a few flakes of snow out of her hair.<p>

"You're here! In one piece!" Sirius hugged her, obviously more worried than she would have expected. But it was impossible for him to not notice her stiffness. "Are you okay?"

"I need to change…"

"Did you talk to Severus?"

"He cannot help us. It's not his fault."

Sirius gaped. "Then what do we do?"

"The Shrieking Shack is occupied. We will have to charm him in."

Sirius swore loudly. But he quickly resigned himself to the task and his curiosity about November's journey resurfaced. "But how did you get back? Did you agree-"

He was cut off by a forceful push against his shoulder, slamming him into the front door. Her hand pinned his shoulder against the door and the other was poised, ready for his throat. Her eyes burned and the muscles in her neck were tensed. For a lightning moment Sirius worried she might kill him. But the moment passed.

"Not another word," she hissed through clenched teeth. Sirius nodded dumbly and she let him go roughly. "We need to clear out a room."

* * *

><p><em>Reviews get previews! :-)<em>


	6. Chapter 6: Cause and Effect

**Chapter 6: Cause and Effect**

The howling was the worst part of the evening. The pair had shrunken the furniture in the room, carried it easily to the room across the hall and done every charm they could think of to contain him within the spare room they had chosen.

November sat on the floor of the room directly across from Remus's current cell, her wand on the floor. She looked shell-shocked and Sirius was sure that if Remus did break out she would just let him kill her. He decided to sit up with her, just in case, but a night of listening to unearthly howling was not going to be easy to bear.

"Here."

November looked up to see a bottle of fire whiskey in her face and two glasses in Sirius's other hand. She took the bottle and poured.

"What to?" she asked, holding the glass up.

There was a screaming cry and they both winced.

"To Remus?" Sirius suggested. November nodded grimly and they drank.

It was some time before she was inebriated enough to start explaining what had happened. They both knew the events had to come out but he was not going to push her; if nothing else he didn't want his eyebrows blown off.

"I agreed to go to dinner with Lucius Malfoy." The words came out very softly but Sirius, who sat shoulder to shoulder with her on the floor, heard them all the same.

"Why, 'Vember?"

"Because I love him," she nodded toward the rattling and howling door across the hall. "Because if there was any chance I could save him I had to pursue it. But now…" Tears welled up in her eyes. "I've just betrayed him."

"How've you betrayed him?"

"He told me what he was. He opened to me and there was a chance…but now it's gone!"

And all of the stress, worry, anger, and fear came bursting out of her in loud sobs. Sirius, inebriated as he was, hugged her close to him and rubbed her arm sympathetically.

"You did what you felt you had to do, 'Vember. No one can fault you for that. Remus will understand."

* * *

><p>November woke up to find the Black home quiet and Sirius's coat draped over her. He had taken it upon himself to finish the bottle and had fallen over on his side before November finally fell asleep.<p>

She groggily pushed herself up and rubbed at her eyes. Last night…last night was a series of horrible memories. The sun was rising now and someone would have to check on Remus. She decided there was no point in waking Sirius and began to remove the charms from the room.

Remus lay facedown on the bare wood floor. New lacerations decorated his body though mercifully he was not completely naked. He seemed to be sleeping.

Kneeling beside him, November could feel emotion welling up in her. "Remus," she soothed.

It was instantaneous and lightning fast. Remus, an inhuman look in his eye, caught her by the throat. November goggled in terror. He snarled at her viciously and began to squeeze. For whatever reason, the transformation had not completely passed.

November began to choke and clawed desperately at his hand. The pressure only increased and he stood, lifting her off of her feet. November had not woken Sirius and now there was no way she could get his attention.

Mercifully, beam of light shone through the window, lighting the room and landing on Remus. A beam of morning light.

His face relaxed and his expression became more human. Panic flashed across his features as he realized what he was doing. Roughly, in his panic he jerked his hand away.

Blackness had begun to cloud November's vision and she dropped to the floor, her hands working to grab something as she gasped and coughed. Arms lifted her to a torso and she gripped Remus's shoulders hard, resting her forehead against his chest and breathing hard.

When she could breathe easily again, she looked up into his eyes. Golden and mournful.

"Was I here last night?"

"Yes," she rasped.

"And you were here last night as well?"

November nodded, her still-red hair burning in the light.

Remus pushed her away and stood under the window. "I'm so sorry. I'm a monster and to expect you to even…" he found himself at a loss for words and gave up, punching a wall.

November quickly stood beside him, taking his cut up face in her hands. "You are what you have always been to me. Nothing can change that."

Remus closed his eyes, gratitude and unworthiness welling up in him. Turning his face into her hand, he kissed her palm gently. He looked back at her and started a little.

"You've got red hair. Did something happen?"

The look she gave him suggested she was less hurt when he was choking her. "Please don't make me… It will all be out soon enough." Her voice was a whisper of pain.

He nodded. There was nothing he could say to this and it was clear she had totally withdrawn from him even if she was physically present.

"Let's get you healed," she said, trying to be more chipper. "This time I won't have to ambush you."

* * *

><p>A message had been sent out to the Order alerting them to an emergency meeting that very evening. It was clear to Remus that this had something to do with the night before but Sirius would only say November had to tell him and go back to sleeping off his hangover. Clearly he would rather have told his friend, but something stopped him.<p>

November would not speak to Lupin at all though it was clear this had nothing to do with his transformation. At least not with Remus' end of it. But this only alarmed him more; what could possibly have happened that would be worse?

All he could do was wait for that evening.

* * *

><p>November poked her head around the door that afternoon, wrapped in a bathrobe. He was gone.<p>

Remus had been prowling around the house, full of nerves. She understood and even sympathized but…she needed a bath to clear her head.

She darted down a floor to the master bath and quickly locked herself in. Once the bath was drawn, she sunk into the clawfoot tub and began to think.

She had not yet told Remus for one reason alone: he would do all in his power to convince her to go back on her end of things. And she adored him so much that she would. But if it were announced among other people who would see this in a less personal light then surely he would not be able to sway her by her emotions.

November was very smart, hence Ravenclaw. She knew that this was an opportunity they needed. Severus was always risking himself in this way and he could not always be there when he was needed, but she could. It would be very easy to set up a false apartment and Floo back to here. She could live in the very headquarters of the Order and there would be no expectation for her to spend all of her time with Lucius.

But what she wanted was so very different.

November shook her head. He knew now that she had cared for him knowing full well what he was…and now all of this. She could not even expect him to care for her now, let alone respect her. This would be the most demeaning thing she had ever done and the man she loved would bear witness to it all. But how selfish would it be of her to not take this chance on account of her own feelings?

She fought to cry silently in the echo-y bathroom, tears dripping to mingle with the water in the bath.

* * *

><p>November did not appear downstairs until Albus arrived and a moment later they swiftly disappeared into the library. Remus debated the virtues of listening on the stair but decided against it. However, as he headed down to dinner, he could not help but overhear Dumbledore speaking very seriously and what sounded like November crying. The door opened and Dumbledore nodded briefly to Remus as he passed.<p>

Lupin stopped where he stood, waiting in hope of crossing paths with November. November exited the library quietly, her eyes a bit puffy. For the first time since that morning, her eyes met his in the eyes.

"I just need you to know…" her voice cracked and she coughed, "I just need you to know it was for you. I wanted to help you."

"But November-"

She pushed past him quickly not trusting herself to stay there alone with him.

He followed behind her but she had entered the dining room before he could catch her. He walked in to hear Albus's booming voice, leaning against a wall behind November.

"Though it is very kind of Molly to prepare us a meal such as this, there is pressing business to deal with. You all know this meeting was called together by November. I will let her explain the situation she now finds herself in."

November was shaking and Remus wanted very much to go to her and comfort her, but he felt that she needed to say this alone.

"As you are, I am sure, aware, last night was the full moon. Due to…circumstances I was worried for Remus's safety."

Remus began to glow red; whatever this was it was caused by him, as if his condition had not cause enough problems. November blushed as well. She knew how this sounded and she could not bear to think about it.

"I was informed," Sirus busied himself with his dinner at this point, "that Snape had always provided a potion for Remus in the past and that it had been quite some time since it's absence."

November took a deep breath and stared directly at Arthur Weasley as she spoke now, knowing he would not react facially until she had finished talking. "I went, last night, to Malfoy Manor in hopes of receiving such a potion from Severus."

Murmurs broke out through the room and she avoided Mad-Eye's mad eye which was fixed on her completely. She raised her voice to continue.

"I believed that if I went as Helena I would be able to gain entrance and exit safely. This was the case but I was informed that Severus is being held there to work on a project of some sort for Voldemort. He had no potion." She broke off and rubbed fiercely at her face. "I knew that there was one chip I could bargain with if I needed to though I hoped it would not be needed. Since allowing me to speak to Severus was a weightier matter than I had imagined, my hand was forced."

The meaning of all of this began to set in for Remus. He had listened without really considering who exactly she would have dealt with at Malfoy Manor.

"I am to see Lucius Malfoy formally tomorrow night."

"NO!"

Everyone stared silently at Remus. His outburst had been very uncharacteristic and they waited to see what this was all about. His face worked from showing surprise to panic to embarrassment. Quietly, he moved to the corner of the room, allowing November to finish explaining. He gripped at his hair furiously. How could this have happened? She had only told him hours ago that she had always known what he was.

A sharp memory came back to him and then another. Memories of the times that he had shot her down, assuming she did not know. Why had he not told her sooner? Why had he forced her away? He had dug his own grave. He had forced her away and she had followed his commands, leaving him behind.

The conversation had moved to include more people as he mulled this over, and he sank heavily into the chair next to Sirius.

"Stupid as this may be," Moody was commenting, "November has given us another in to the Death Eaters. However, if she were to meet the Dark Lord and he were to fail to recognize her, as he surely would, her life would be forfeit."

"November has agreed to these risks, Alastor," replied Albus, "Much as Severus himself has and as you and the Aurors do daily."

"But she's not an Auror!" exclaimed Molly, shocked that this was seriously being entertained.

"But she should have been…" Arthur's reminder brought silence back down on the room. Many of them remembered Titus from the Ministry. Many remembered his death.

"How long can this be kept up?" asked Kingsly. "This is the real question. How long can she keep Malfoy's attention while remaining out of the way?"

"She needs a better story. Hers will be found out far too quickly," added Moody.

Some time was given to think things through and it was decided a vote should be taken. When all was said and done, the Order of the Phoenix agreed that this was a useful connection to further their information about the Dark Lord. November would begin to date Lucius Malfoy for as long as she could safely do so.

The moment the vote was done, Remus, who had voted against, was out the door.

"Moony! Wait!" Sirius caught his friend by the arm. "You have to talk to her! If November knew how you felt-"

"It would change nothing! She cannot back out of this! You heard what they said!"

"But this has nothing to do with how she feels about you!"

"Right! Because I have a lot to offer when she's being courted by a rich, handsome, whole, and powerful Pure Blood wizard." He yanked his arm free. "I'm sure she'll fall right into my arms," he growled.

Remus pushed Sirius aside and Sirius did not follow.


	7. Chapter 7: Dating and Duels

**Chapter 7: Dating and Duels**

"Thanks," murmured Remus, holding the front door open for Tonks.

"Not at all," she replied cheerfully. The young witch could not help but notice the cloudy look on his face, however. "Listen. She still doesn't feel very sure of herself. Maybe you could pop up and calm her down?"

Remus searched Tonk's face. "Are you sure that would be a good idea?"

"You're the only one she wants to see," smiled Tonks, squeezing his arm before heading into the night.

Remus latched the door before leaning back against it. Tonight was the night. A story had been devised for November to use: her werewolf was killed when he went on rampage and she had to flee to a new home in Britain, though she had previously lived in Germany. It was believeable but vauge and werewolf rumors had been circulating for some time around the Black Forrest.

There was nothing he wanted less than to prepare her for her date and so Tonks had been asked in. Though Tonks was not a particularly feminine witch, she and November had been locked away for an hour and things seemed to calm down when she arrived.

He supposed he should follow Tonk's advice and go speak to November. He began to move toward the stairs when he looked up and saw her.

November stood at the bottom of the stair with Sirus helping her. She had not worn heels in the better part of three years and she was convinced she was going to die. Her dress was a phenomenal bright, deep blue, diving quite low in the front and falling in a satin cascade. Her hair was pinned in an intricate updo that could only have been due to Tonks and impressed Remus greatly.

"Ginny picked it out. I owled her and asked what worked for a red head and she suggested this. Tonks helped of course," November explained in response to the look he was giving her.

"Not to cuckold anyone," Sirius gave Remus a quick but significant look, "but you are the most divine female either of us have ever seen. Right, Lupin?" Sirius beamed at her.

Remus could not find words; all the emotions were a bit much at the moment. Blushing deep red he stammered a bit before taking off down the hall and hiding in the kitchen.

November watched him go with a sinking feeling.

"If it makes you feel better," Sirius whispered in her ear, "I've never seen him do that before."

In spite of the seriousness of the evening, November laughed aloud.

* * *

><p>Lucius had reluctantly agreed to meet her within a few blocks of the restaurant they would be going to and so November slipped quickly into a bolero before leaving. Her fingers touched the door handle when she was aware that someone was behind her. Turning slowly she was face to face with Remus.<p>

"I couldn't let you go without telling you…"

"Telling me what?"

Her eyes grew large with expectation and he could feel his own pulse quicken.

"How…beautiful you look." The let-down was almost tangible between them. Somehow Remus had to let his feelings be known, even if not directly, so he spoke quickly and with deep emotion, "If he harms you, I will kill him with my own hands."

The sinister tone in Remus' voice surprised November; he meant what he said.

"I will return unharmed. I promise," she gently held his face in her hands and smiled up at him. November turned back to the door and paused. She glanced back over her shoulder at him, her hand resting on the doorknob. Whirling around, she threw herself into Remus' arms. He held her tightly to him, hoping she would not leave, but finally she broke away. She took his hand and placed her ring into his open palm.

"Watch this for me?"

He nodded dumbly. The door shut behind her, leaving Remus with his worries and fears.

* * *

><p>Lucis was pleased when he saw a red head appear at their meeting spot. Again he was struck by how pretty she could be. She was not inherently lovely, not like Narcissa, but she had a sex appeal Narcissa had always lacked. Even as she approached him, a coy smile flirted around her lips.<p>

"You look stunning," he purred at her, taking her in with his eyes.

"I was about to say the same of you." Her hand ran lightly through his blonde hair and traced the line of his jaw.

She found herself in an unfamiliar area of London. It was a wealthy district to begin with and the passages they followed finally led out into a very wealthy sector for witches and wizards. November became immediately glad that she had asked for Ginny and Tonk's assistance.

After being led through what had to be a fabulously expensive restaurant, Lucius gently helped November remove her jacket.

"What in Merlin's name is this?" His voice had a tone of genuine surprise and November breathed a sigh of relief. She had placed a gash across her shoulder to give validity to her story; it hurt like the devil but it was needed. His hand ran across her shoulder and she shivered; his hand was ice.

"The werewolf," she answered quietly, taking the seat he pulled out for her.

Lucius' eyebrows jumped, showing clear alarm. "He didn't…?"

"No. He was killed. The people around the Black Forest are rather…fearful."

A smile played on Malfoy's face and he leaned forward. "That was you?"

"Not personally, no. But indirectly, yes. However, it is all over now. A dead werewolf and lingering suspicions has sent me to take up residency in England."

"This explains your being rather hard to find. And how is the Dark Lord taking this?"

She sighed heavily before grinning up at Malfoy. "I may have stretched the truth in claiming I was of any importance to him; it works with your thugs but I never intended you to become a part of all of this. The truth is I wanted closeness to you and had already been working along these lines, if you will." She leaned over, revealing even more of her chest than already was uncovered. "I do hope you will come to forgive me."

Malfoy was torn. Currently he was looking at a lovely eyeful of Dark Witch; he knew he should be angry at being misled, but it was not as if he had any intention of a long-term relationship with this witch. And it was quite flattering really, that she would lie in order to bring herself closer to him. The current crowd of witches were either out of their minds, like Bellatrix, or so stiff they could be snapped in half in a breeze. But Helena was _young_ and fluid…

Sensing the changing tide in his thinking, November turned his hand over in hers and began to trace the lines in his palm. Lucius watched her, contemplating the right reaction. She deliberately traced out his love line, before smiling at him playfully and reading it closely.

"What do you see, Helena?"

"A strong desire…long and powerful…your love line that is, of course." She leaned back pulling her hand back from his. The expression he wore told her clearly she had won; desire had burned up any anger.

"I must admit, Helena, how I do admire your cleverness. It seems you could have nearly anything you wanted."

"I do generally get what I want," she returned seductively. "That's part of what makes me so very bad."

Malfoy grinned before leaning back to contemplate the menu. It would be a divine privilege to bed her.

* * *

><p>November went through the evening as one watching a play. Her mind had long since turned off and Helena reigned supreme. She watched Helena move through the evening with ease. Helena had great chemistry with Malfoy and he charmed her as well. But this, as before was the real danger; under no circumstances was Helena to win out. It was November's body and November's soul that would suffer for allowing Malfoy in.<p>

When the night came to a close Lucius gallantly insisted on escorting her home. She did not doubt part of this was cunning on his part; he would not forgive her if he ever discovered she had tricked him again.

"But my home will not be even a slight fragment as nice as yours. It will be an embarrassment I assure you, " she had argued.

"My home is a crypt." The fervent emotion in those words surprised November; he felt trapped in some capacity.

She took his outstretched arm and there was a loud crack.

"Very charming" were the first words from Malfoy's mouth as he observed her street. She had dropped them in the park nearby the rented flat. It had been agreed that she would remain there for an hour before returning to Grimmauld.

She punched him lightly in the arm and a surprised smile traced his thin lips. "I told you it was horrible."

"No such thing. Your home contains you. This is a vast improvement over mine."

She looked away, forcing a satisfied smile. A ripple of thunder rolled overhead. A drop of rain hit them through the trees. Then another and a moment later a torrent rained down on them.

"Here!" Lucius pulled off his robe and draped it over November. They began to run until he heels tripped her up. He caught her as she feel, saving her from the mud. She could not help but laugh aloud and as she looked up she was hit with a wall of conflicting emotion.

He was sexy to begin with but soaked with rain he was irresistible. His long hair hung back from his face and his white shirt was plastered to his muscular arms. And any man in a suit vest was a turn on. But was that enough?

Though November was contemplating her own reaction, Lucius had decided his long before this moment. Pulling her to him, his lips crashed onto hers. She clung to him and mechanically kissed him back. It felt as if she were selling her soul, but else was there to do?

They finally broke apart.

"Helena, I shall be quite honest with you," Lucius announced, holding her tightly. "I desire you."

There was clearly more that he intended to say on the matter but November had already been thinking of a tactful way of postponing what was clearly the endgame for Lucius.

"I know. However…" November turned on a playful smile as she saw Malfoy's face fall. "I am not to be won quite so easily."

"You have made yourself hard to find and have avoided answering my request, both of which I am very aware required initiative on my part. Surely that is worth something?"

"Indeed. It was worth this evening. But I do not know you, Lucius Malfoy. You are a figure to me, not a man, and I'll not take a figure as a lover."

"I assure you, you could know me quite well," he breathed, his voice deep with longing. He pressed against her and she could feel his hardness pressing between them.

"As could you," she cooed in return, gently caressing his thigh. She withdrew though, putting space between them. "With a little conversation. Give me reason to trust you; let me know you and I will be yours."

Lucius seemed to be debating and she could not guess at his thoughts. But he was wondering what this was worth. She was devilishly attractive and slippery as an eel, well worth whatever material investments he might need to make toward sleeping with her. But an emotional investment was a different thing entirely. His divorce had been long, messy, and quite honestly very painful. But, it was also not so unreasonable, her request. All she probably wanted was to know she would not be taken advantage of, and, as much as he wanted to take advantage of her, it belied a shrewdness on her part that he was beginning to appreciate. He was willing to play on her terms, for now.

"Then we surely must meet again, Helena. I would hate to lose such a prize as you."

November grimaced inwardly at the word "prize" but held her tongue.

"I look forward to your owl," she smiled, giving him a mock curtsey. She turned to leave.

With unexpected fervor, she was spun around and kissed one last time. It was an impressive kiss and, for a moment, she feared her own resolution. But a picture came to mind: Remus, asleep on the hall steps, waiting for her to come home. She broke off from the kiss, bade him goodnight, and disappeared into the apartment building.

* * *

><p>Lucius walked away, a bit in shock. He had never actually been turned down before. He could not think of a time when he had been denied the sex he craved.<p>

In his younger days that last sweeping kiss had always worked. Maybe it was his age, which was a terrifying thought.

He found it hard to believe that she meant what she said, but she was a minx and a trickster. It was always possible that the trickster was wary of being tricked.

He headed out into the night, hoping for a glance of November changing but disappointed to see curtains, and with a loud crack he was gone.

* * *

><p>November woke the next day to a light knock on her door. Her clock showed noon, which was unheard of for her, but she hadn't returned to the house until 2 am last night either. Remus had been exactly as she had pictured his, which alarmed her a bit. <em>LeviCorpus<em> had placed him in bed and she herself had gone to sleep almost as soon as she hit the bed.

"Come in," she called out, pulling the quilt up to her chin.

Remus' shaggy head poked around her door and a smile lit up her features.

"If it's a bad time…" he began.

"You've already woken me up. No point in not coming in."

He seemed torn before deciding to come in. The door gently closed behind him and November patted to the side of the bed. He smiled softly and, gently lifting her up, leaned back against the wall so she could rest against his side.

"Glad you are alright."

She snorted. "Safe, yes. Alright, no."

Concern clouded his features and he went rigid. "What happened?"

"It's just…complicated."

"Please."

November wanted nothing more than to just act as if nothing had happened but Remus had asked her not to leave him in the dark. And he was her dearest friend; if she did not tell him, she would tell no one and eventually explode. There was Sir Cadougan but conversing with a painting of a relative really was not the same.

She sighed and charged through her thoughts in one breath: "It's clear what he wants and I know that I've lead him in that direction. At the time it seemed like a grand idea to hold his attention but now I have no intention whatsoever of fulfilling this. However, I can really only stall for so long. I've played off of his sense of honor, but honor only lasts so long with men. Then what?"

"That's a negative view, 'Vember," Remus mused. Without realizing what he was doing, his hand began to weave its way through her thick hair.

"It's Malfoy. It's not you."

Remus' attention was piqued. "Meaning?"

November looked deep into his amber eyes. "Meaning I know I would not have to play your honor to get you to treat me with respect. You always have and I know you always will."

She turned to smile up at him and was caught by his eyes. His face was so very close to hers and the feeling of her body snuggled up to his as he played with her hair…She broke eye contact quickly, afraid of what could happen with her caught in that gaze. "At any rate this does not answer my question."

"Personally, I will have to refer you to Sirius on this one. Or even, as much as I hate it, Severus. I've never 'played the field' so I am of little use in all of this and Severus knows Malfoy better than any of us."

"That's what I like most about you though," she commented absently. "There's nothing sordid about you."

Remus was shocked. "I'm a werewolf!"

"But that's an occurrence; it's not who you are."

He shook his head but did not argue. He pulled her ring out of his pocket and handed it to her. "For you."

She slipped it on her finger where she began to twirl it absently. He sensed that was the most he would learn of the evening but it was enough. One particular statement had raised his hopes immensely: she had announced she had no intention of sleeping with Malfoy. Indeed it was the source of the current conflict. Maybe she could really be his…

"Thank you, Remus." November's voice cut through this thoughts and jerked him back to the cloudy rainy morning he was a part of.  
>"What on earth for?"<p>

She shrugged her angled shoulders. "Everything really. You do more than you know."

* * *

><p>The next two months contained series of dates mixed with early October and November snow. With each date she managed to win Lucius over a little more and convince him to wait a little bit longer. It was an odd combination for November: he was becoming more attached to her while she was being repelled further from him. The more she knew about him the less she liked.<p>

They were all very cautious, making sure she never wore the same clothes twice and leaving her ring always with Remus. November had explained in more detail how her 'alibi' had worked but how she was sure another breach of trust could be her last.

In the blur of activity, two dates stood out sharply.

In October, November had arrived early at Malfoy Manor. Severus had informed her about a localized Death Eater meeting that would be going on there and the Order had decided it would be a good opportunity for her to glean some information.

She had arrived through the Floo off of the rented flat and had immediately come up against a problem.

November began to make her way to the dining room, now familiar enough with the Manor to find the larger rooms in the maze of it all. Turning a corner near to the dining room she had run up against someone. Someone large, hairy, and wolfish. Someone who was Fenrir Greyback. Her heart had stopped and she was covered instantly in chills.

"Watch where you're going!" She had barked, forcing volume and power into her words.

"And who exactly might you be?"

Instead of backing off he had pushed her to the wall, hand planted against the wall next to her head, cutting off her path.

"Helena Freyson. I know who you are well enough. Let me pass!"

He looked her over and she felt sick. "You're what Malfoy has been tying himself in knots over aren't you?" He leaned close and breathed in deeply. "What a pretty piece of flesh."

Knowing some display of power was needed, she sent a Patronus to the dining room before flicking her wand under Fenrir's chin. "One more word, Mr. Greyback."

"But I like it when they fight back," he growled, lurching toward her.

When Lucius dashed around the corner, he was stunned to see Fenrir lying on the ground and bound with vines that grew tighter with each exhalation. Her Patronus had alerted Malfoy that she was in the manor and he had come looking for her. "Let him go, Helena! Are you mad?"

To be honest, November was sure she was. She had not actually intended to attack Fenrir but when he had moved at her the spell had just torn out of her. She was as trigger happy as Bellatrix.

The vines loosened at her silent command and Fenrir tore them from him snarling. "You will pay, bitch!"

November tried her hardest to ignore him and maintained eye contact with Lucius. "Call off your dog."

Fenrir began to protest but he was drowned out by a roar of "Leave us!" from Malfoy. The werewolf snarled at November before turning the corner. In reply, November hissed loudly back at him.

Once he was out of earshot, Lucius pulled her close to him. "Do you wish to die?"

"Your 'companion' was about to forcibly sample your goods! He's _lucky_." She spat the words out at him and yanked herself out of his grip.

Lucius' eyebrows shot up and a smile began to curl his lips. "So he is. I will… 'speak' to him." Something seemed to cross his mind and he cast her a sideways look that she could not read. "Fenrir does have a taste for women. We cannot both have you, of course. Though, one cannot tell about the future…"

November's blood froze. It was a very thinly veiled threat: if this ended badly Fenrir would get exactly what he wanted.

She needed to change the tone of conversation and quickly. "I am sorry if my timing was poor. I was only looking forward to seeing you."

He smiled at her, his face relaxing. "A bit early, but nothing inconvenient. I have a few matters yet to attend to so you may join me if you wish. It could be quite educational."

November had agreed and had regretted it. But for the time being that was her lot.

When she had returned home that evening, she had made it half way up the stairs before breaking down completely. Her sobs had brought Remus running to her, bare-chested and in pajamas. He had scooped her up in his arms and carried her silently to the alcove. Without one word, he had held her tightly to him, rocking her in his arms as she sobbed out her terror. She had told him everything, a rare occurrence, and begged him not to do anything about it. It was the hardest promise he had ever made in his life.

They woke up the next day, curled up together on the couch in the alcove, November half draped on top of Remus, her face resting on his warm chest, and his arms still around her.

* * *

><p>The second came in mid-November. The actual date had been fine. November had again been present for part of a Death Eater meeting and they had left for dinner from there. Unfortunately, Aurors had been placed on their trail.<p>

November had arrived back to Grimmauld Place without her coat and soaked through around midnight. Sirius had been crossing the hall and watched as she tore through the front door, slammed it shut, and fell back against it. For a moment it seemed as if she was just out of breath, but in the next moment she fell forward, her face slamming into the floor.

"REMUS!"

Sirius had thrown books and candles to the floor as he cleared the table to lay her on it. Pulling his arms back, he was shocked to find them soaked in red. Her back was covered in warm blood. Sirius had turned her over quickly and ripped away the dress from the wound.

This was of course the moment when Remus entered the room.

"What are you doing?" he shouted at his friend before he fully took in the situation. Once he noticed that Sirius was covered in water and blood it was clear enough what Sirius was doing.

For a moment they both stared; a long gash sliced open her back, not deep but oozing blood. Working quickly they were able to patch her up before sending an owl for Molly. She arrived as soon as she received the letter and forced the men from the room, insisting on November's decency.

Sirius bit back a snappy comment about the value of that, knowing it would only upset Remus. In his less fine moments he had taken to harassing November about her current 'occupation' until one day she threatened to "curse him out of his f*&%ing mind" if he did not back down. He was not Remus; he did not deal with this calmly and hold in his frustration. Unfortunately, he was unleashing it in all the wrong places. So for once, he held his tongue.

When the whole story came out the next day, it turned out that Lucius and November had been ambushed during their meal. Kingsly had been one of the Aurors sent for this and he and November had managed to place themselves so that the two of them were dueling alone in the sleet outside. Even then, real injuries had to be inflicted for deniability's sake. She had blackened his eye with a levitated board to the face and had turned to run. While Kingsly had intended her escape, his partner had not. She had felt her back tear open and had Apparated to Grimmauld.

Early in their 'relationship,' November and Lucius had agreed that were anything to happen they would not contact one another as they did not want to draw attention or identify themselves unintentionally. The plan had been for herself and Lucius to see each other two nights later but when that day came, November was still horribly sick from the cold and injuries.

Remus had stayed beside her and had taken care of her, as she had done for him the past three moons. He was able to bring a smile to her face if nothing else and that was worth a lot.

November had sent an owl to inform Lucius that she was ill and staying with a friend. She had fallen asleep before the reply arrived, but Remus was reading when Malfoy's owl came.

The first thing that he noticed was that it was not a letter Malfoy had sent in reply. There were two objects, wrapped in paper. One was a pot of orchids, very expensive in the month of November. The second was a long, elegantly patterned scarf of deep teal silk. The card was not sealed or enveloped so Remus flipped it over and read: _"So sorry to hear that you are not well, though I take pleasure at finding you have not fallen into other ills. I was ready to act should I have received any word that you were in need of me. Hopefully this friend of yours can adequately care for you, though I would, of course, rather be there myself. One should know the healing power of a kiss. I grieve the loss of our time together and send you these small tokens to raise your spirits. I look forward to seeing you as soon as you are well again. Sincerely, Lucius Malfoy"_

Remus' blood pressure rose as he read the card and upon the line about the kiss a loud ringing began from the blood pounding in his ears. He crumpled the card with fury and threw it under her bed. He would have liked to have burned the presents as well, but he knew it would upset November. Leaving them on her bedside table he stormed down the stairs.

Sirius caught him as he was pulling on a coat.

"Where're you off to?"

"A walk. I need air."

"And if November asks for you?"

"She won't." The tone in his voice was dangerous and Sirius did not push him further.

The door slammed behind Lupin hard enough to rattle the wall of the house.

* * *

><p><em>Thank you to everyone who has added the story to your alerts.<em>

_I made 'cover art' for this story if you are interested in such things (the links are in my profile). It's not super talented but it makes me happy. _

_As always, review!_


	8. Chapter 8: Saving Things That Matter

**Chapter 8: Saving Things That Matter**

November stretched and yawned loudly. She appreciated that she was generally left alone the morning after a 'date night.' Last night had been particularly bizarre, with Lucius regaling her with stories of Muggle torture and her improvising her own. She had gone to bed with the mental equivalent of a bad taste in the mouth.

But in the fresh morning light things seemed cleaner. Something also floated around her brain, trying to show its importance to her but she could not figure out what it was.

She wandered out to the shower, unaware she was being watched.

* * *

><p>"She's finally up," hissed Charlie, poking his mother in the side.<p>

"Mercifully! She sleeps like the dead! I'll put in the cake."

Remus smiled as he continued taping paper chains around the room. He knew November didn't remember, but he did.

Today was her birthday.

* * *

><p>November was considering the virtues of just staying in her room all day when her bedroom door burst open.<p>

The sight of Sirius put her in an immediately black mood.

"Someone is full of ambition on this lovely winter day."

"November's not winter," she mumbled, trying to ignore him.

"You do realize that greenhouse or not the plants will die if you don't water them?"

"And what is your sudden concern with my plants? Water them yourself."

Sirus was becoming annoyed. He had volunteered to lure November downstairs but this was not going well at all. Drastic measures would have to be taken.

Out of the corner of her eye, November saw Sirius snatch her ring from the bedside table. She spun around, ready to breathe fire.

"Give it back, now!"  
>"Come and get it!"<p>

From the kitchen, Arthur winced as thundering footsteps approached. He had tried to suggest Lupin might be a better choice but no one listened to him. Shouting grew louder as they approached and something smashed into the wall of the hallway. There was a pained sound as Sirius burst into the dining room, November close behind him, minus one shoe.

She froze in the doorway, not seeming to comprehend why there was a group staring at her. The exclamations of "Surprise!" didn't even seem to make it in. But when her eyes focused on a familiar face something finally clicked.

"Charlie!" she flung herself into the arms of her friend.

"Happy Birthday, November!"

"Birthday?"

"November 28th," Charlie laughed, holding her back at arm's length.

"Merlin's Beard, it is!"

She spun on Sirius. "So you…?"

"Were trying to get you down here for your own damn party!" He handed her ring back and kissed her lightly on the forehead. His own forehead was sporting a growing purple knot.

"I'm so sorry! Let me heal–"

"Won't hear of it!" he cut her off. "War wound!"

Molly found this to be just the right moment to restore order and direct November to blow out her birthday candles.

"It was Dad's idea for me to be here," Charlie explained through a mouthful of cake, pulline up a chair with November. "Thought it might 'lighten your day.'"

November thanked Arthur profusely. But as she turned back to Charlie, certain golden eyes caught her attention. It was immediately clear to her that Remus had been watching her. The way that his eyes flicked away but then instantly back gave him away. A blush crept over her cheeks and she focused back on Charlie.

"He spends a lot of time doing that, in case you haven't noticed," Charlie ribbed gently, before she could speak. "The party was his idea as well."

"Oh really?"

The oldest Weasley knew her well enough to know that she was interested in the former comment much more than the latter. He leaned much closer to her.

"Titus would not mind. You know that. What is stopping you?"

"From what?" she murmured, fighting the urge to look at Remus.

"From pushing him to a wall and shagging him silly."

The bluntness of the reply shocked November, not because of its content but because of its perceptiveness. Her eyes darted to Lupin's and the deep red that covered her face began to grow across his as well. There was no way he could know what was being said but he knew it was about him.

Smoothly, he offered to help Molly bring something out of the kitchen and quickly disappeared, still glowing red.

"Tell me, Charlie Weasley," she replied after finally collecting herself. "How often do you get everything you want?"

"As often as I take it," he grinned back at her.

"It's more complicated than that."

"No doubt. You're both tying yourself in knots."

Something seemed to change over in November and she laughed aloud. "And who was the last witch you were with? When did you become such an expert?"

Charlie grinned back at her and let the conversation slide. There would be no moving her until she wanted to be moved. But the suggestion was in her mind and apparently more loudly than he would have guessed.

The party wound down late, with Sirius surprisingly sober, and the Weaselys were thanked and seen off. Without planning or forethought, Remus and November found themselves together alone in the kitchen. November worked on a charm to get the dishes to wash themselves.

"I really appreciate this," she said quickly, before Remus could leave. "Charlie told me you planned it all."

"That was about all I did," he returned easily, smiling at her. "But you're welcome. I thought you should have a memorable birthday in a less positively memorable year."

"It was very nearly perfect," November murmured.

"Tell me what was missing and I will do my best to remedy it," Remus replied, moving very close to her. He held his breath. If she dared, he would as well.

"OY! Need any help?" Sirius called from the hall.

Quickly, November stepped back from Remus; the moment died. "Butterbeer!" she replied quickly. She forced a smile and left behind the dishes that were washing themselves and Remus.

* * *

><p>Mid-December brought Death Eater business and so November 'informed' Lucius Malfoy that she was traveling for the next few weeks as a way to lighten move herself out of the way. She had gleaned useful information but Severus had made it clear with what was coming it would be better for her to be out of the way.<p>

With time and freedom, Diagon Alley became a haunt of Remus and November's. One particular afternoon, snow began to fall thickly around them as they picked their way through the icy puddles and shop stalls.

"And it was, of course, at that moment that I realized I had on no trousers!" November exclaimed, ending a story of a minor crisis of hers at the Ministry.

"But you had on a long shirt," Remus laughed.

"Well yes and I tried to play it off as a dress. This did not save me from a lecture from Mad-Eye though about work appropriate clothing though."

Remus laughed loudly. "I cannot imagine who was more embarrassed!"

"Oh, very definitely him. What with the magical eye and all."

The two of them cracked up and turned down a long side alley. But as their laughter died away, another sound came to November's attention and she paled.

"Lucius!" she hissed, grabbing at Remus and pulling him to a standstill.

The deep, cultured drawl landed on his ears as well and he immediately began to calculate any route out. The alley they were in was a dead end and a particular antiquities dealer lay at the end. Given past experiences and gleanings from November, it was almost certain Lucius would be headed there. They had nowhere to hide and of course you could not Apparate out.

"Change your hair! Do something!"

"I can't!" she hissed back, looking ill. "I could set it on fire or blow off my face!"

"Then pretend–"

"I'm supposed to be on holiday somewhere _not here_. And if he finds me with you…He would kill you!"

There was real fear in her voice and the sound of the Death Eater grew closer. Something had to be done. A pure impulse idea flashed into Lupin's mind and he acted without thinking.

November felt herself being almost half lifted and half directed to the brick wall behind her. Remus' thin but sinewy arms wrapped around her and mechanically her own arms slipped around his neck. Then Remus Lupin's lips crashed onto November Cadougan's.

All they needed was a kiss or two to cover their faces until Lucius passed, but this was more than a disguise. This was an opportunity. Sparks that had gone between them now roared to life. Remus savored the first long kiss. He grasped at November's hips, pressing himself closer to her. His kiss turned into a flurry of kisses, and she responded passionately to them. All of the fighting for self-control had broken down and his tongue parted her lips.

When Lucius Malfoy turned up the alley for the shop he was seeking, he was unpleasantly surprised to find a couple making out halfway down the alley. The woman's face he could not catch but there was something familiar about the male. He watched bemused for a moment as the woman worked her hands through the man's thick hair and the man grasped at her back, hands obviously aching to roam.

"And this is what you have to look forward to when visiting places for common Mudbloods, Draco," he drawled aloud to his son. He passed them as far away as he could and the pair entered the shop without giving them a second thought.

Remus felt a shock leap through him as he realized what was happening. He had sworn to protect her from this and now…

Remus jerked away roughly, needing the force to disentangle himself quickly. The shocked expression on her face was more than he could handle so he turned away. He needed some excuse and so he crept toward the door of the shop. Lucius' voice could clearly be heard inside.

"Come on," Remus whispered, taking her by the arm and leading her down a few blocks, before turning off into another alley. He tried his best to hide his raging erection. After catching their breath for a moment, for both were panting though not from exertion, Remus spoke again. Even as the words came out of his mouth he wanted to gouge out his eyes. "I'm glad that worked."

"Worked?" November had totally spaced on the original reason for all of this.

"Malfoy. He had no idea it was you and here we are now. Safe and sound."

"So…that's it then?" She stared him down and he was forced to turn from the power of her gaze.

"Yes. That's it." His sense of shame was too great, and so he lied.

There was a long silence and when he looked back up, she was gone.

* * *

><p><em>Petrificus Totalus!<em>

Remus had hoped to return unnoticed but apparently no such thing would happen. The spell hit him in the entryway and he hit the floor.

He had really expected this. What he hadn't expected was that it would be Sirius cursing him. Sirius Black stood over his friend and glowered darkly down at him. At last he crouched beside his petrified friend.

"I understand if you would like to sleep with November and you know I would never raise a finger to stop you. The two of you are ideal and should have long ago."

_This is not what I expected_ thought Remus.

"But if you expect me to sit idly by as you take advantage of her, I cannot emphasize how wrong you are."

_Not taking advantage of! Embarrassed! Panicked! _

"Should she come to me in tears again, that day will be very painful for you. As if her life is not miserable enough without you leading her on! Friend or not, you can be a real git, Remus."

Sirius began to walk away before returning slowly. "I've arranged for her to move in with Nymphadora. She will leave after Christmas. I am sure you can understand why."

He left Remus in the hall, frozen solid but mind racing and screaming in protest.

* * *

><p>The worst part of the following week and a half for Remus was that he could do nothing to fix what he had broken. Sirius would not let him be alone with November if he could help it and November herself avoided him pointedly. But all Remus wanted, at this point, was to apologize. It was too late to explain or save himself but he just wanted to mend things as best as he could before…she left him. Something about her leaving, about her moving away, seemed very final, as if it would put a definite end to all of this and he didn't want it to end like this.<p>

But then, shortly before Christmas…

A head had appeared in the fireplace where he was reading and he had nearly jumped out of his skin. It was Mad-Eye Moody.

"November up?"

"I haven't actually spoken to her in–"

"Spare me your drama, boy!" the head roared at him. "Arthur's badly hurt! We need somewhere to bring him and November's the best healer on short notice. Get her NOW!"

Remus was out of the chair in a second and burst into her room without knocking. An alarmed November shot up in bed, wide-eyed.

"November, Arthur is hurt and they need you to heal him. Mad-Eye's in the fireplace in the library." He knelt beside her bed trying to soothe her.

She was out of bed and running down the hall in a moment before realizing the house was freezing. "Get my bathrobe!" she called back to him. It was the first thing she had said to him in a week and a half.

When he brought her robe to her she had moved to the kitchen and was building up the large fireplace. She threw the fuzzy robe around her and pushed him back. Green flames roared to life and Mad-Eye and Kingsly stepped through, bearing a bloodied Arthur between them.

Remus watched November visibly blanch. She began to work quickly, pulling her hair back tightly and ordering Remus to boil water. A barrage of questions began about the injuries and their cause.

"Reason to believe it was Nagini."  
>"The snake?"<p>

Mad-Eye nodded.

"Alastor!" she cried loudly. "Poison is completely different! I –"

"You help him or he dies," Alastor snarled, grabbing the front of her robe and pulling her to him. Kingsly stepped smoothly in front of Remus as he began to dart toward the pair. "I didn't bring him here to bleed out on your table, woman!"

November was shaken but she nodded, the aggression seeming to have given her a sense of focus. Slowly, she held her hands out over Arthur and began to murmur. If she could close the wounds and slow the flow of blood that would be something. She felt his pulse slow, not dangerously so, and she focused on the larger of the wounds.

As soon as it was clear she was helping in any way, Moody went stomping through the house. He returned shortly with a stack of medical spell books and began rifle through them. November was beginning to look tired.

"Remus! Take her into the other room. I'll take it from here."

November let her hands drop and she swayed on the spot. Deftly, Remus took her in his arms and steered her through into the dining room. With a wave a chair moved for her and he placed her gently in it.

She grabbed at his arm and he knelt beside her. "In the greenhouse. Morning's Breath. Arthur needs a tea of it when he wakes."

Remus quickly relayed the message to the pair in the kitchen. "Good thought! He won't wake for some time but he's out of danger now." The whirling eye stopped to stare at him. "She saved him."

He nodded numbly before leaving the kitchen and finding himself on the stairs. He curled up across a few steps and tried not to let his mind wander too much. Footsteps behind him caused him to raise his head. It was Sirius looking groggy.

"Wot's goin' on?"

Remus was tired of explaining so with a flick of his wand he passed the memory to Sirius.

Sirius swore under his breath after it had played out for him. "You want me to sit up with 'Vember?"

Remus only nodded and lay his head back on the step. Slowly, he drifted into sleep.

It was close to dawn before another sound woke him. Someone wailing. He poked his head into the kitchen to see Molly hugging Arthur's prone figure and crying loudly. As he watched November appeared and pulled her from her husband. The older woman clung to her, crying that his hand had been on danger all night and she knew something had gone wrong. November understood Molly though and soon had tasked her with various small things she could do to keep her busy. Remus caught a glimpse of November's face and decided that whatever the consequence, now was the time to help her escape the chaos.

"If it would not be too much trouble, I can't quite find that plant of yours, November."

She seemed to understand him and quickly excused herself, following him out. They walked through the greenhouse in silence. She reached a plant, knelt and picked a handful of it, and handed it to him carefully, not letting her hand touch his own.

"There you are."

"November…" Remus could feel the words welling up in him and though he knew this was not the best time, he couldn't stop them. "I was an ass. Pure and simple. It was all wrong and it was my fault. I would never take advantage of you. If you must leave please, _please_, believe me and accept my most sincere apology. I just can't bear to lose you like this." Hoping for some sincerity points, he even got on his knees. "I adore you and I acted on impulse. It was dishonorable."

November watched him carefully, kneeling in the dirt in front of her, before she spoke. "I believe what I appreciate most is your grammatically correct use of 'an ass.'"

A smile slowly spread across her face and Remus grinned with relief. "I was, you know."

"I know."

He got slowly to his feet and she allowed him to hug her. She was so tired.

"Bed?" he asked simply.

"I should wait until the kids arrive."

"They won't be here till morning."

"In that case, yes. Bed."

November slept deeply and her dreams revolved around Remus on one knee in front of her and a bleeding Arthur Weasley, a morbid combination really.

* * *

><p>It seemed inevitable that this would happen. Molly had gone back to the Burrow to gather together things for the kids and herself. She would only be gone for a few hours and of course that was when the kids arrived. Remus had tried to let November sleep but he was at a loss as far as how to comfort a teenage girl and the twins. Ron just gaped.<p>

November was downstairs quickly, still in her pajamas and pulling Weasley children to her.

"So sorry, November," mumbled a glassy eyed George. "Don't mean t' fall apart on you."

"I owe you gentlemen and you know it," she replied, patting their cheeks. "You gave me more than this those years ago."

Ginny had wrapped her arms around November on her appearance and showed no sign of letting go. She cried silently.

"You want to see your dad? He's not pretty but he's whole."

"Thanks to her." It was the first time Remus had spoken but he knew November would downplay all of it.

"Thanks, 'Vember," Ron managed. "Could we see him?"

Arthur was sleeping in one of the spare rooms. He was swollen and cut but he was alive and obviously resting peacefully. It seemed to help them to physically see their father and they moved back down to the dining room.

"Your mother will be back soon enough with some things for you. I assume other guests will be joining us?"

"Harry," Ron answered, looking less dazed.

November smiled. "Sirius will be pleased." Remus saw her gaze shift to him and she smiled. "Remus should tell you about how Mad-Eye scared him out of his wits while I get you tea."

The pair crossed, hands brushing, and November hid herself in the kitchen leaning back against the wall. Laughter sounded from the kitchen and she smiled to herself. He was a good storyteller and it would distract them. The kitchen fire roared green next to her and she watched as Harry Potter stepped through. Another burst and Molly followed.

"My dear! How are you?"

"Embarrassed," she answered sheepishly, indicating that she was still in her pajamas. "Sorry, Harry."

"Oh stuff!" Molly exclaimed. "She saved Arthur's life!" Molly explained to Harry.

"Mom?" There was a flood of red heads and November found herself shuffled into a corner next to the Boy Who Lived.

"I'm glad you could help him," Harry offered as means of conversation.

"Ah, yeah. Well, I owe them a lot."

Harry watched the greetings going on in front of him, a big hugging knot of Weasleys. "Did you know my father?"

"No. Not directly. I was a few years younger and Ravenclaw. I knew your mother better." She watched his expression curiously. It was hard for her to imagine that he had never known his own parents. "We traded places for the Halloween Feast one year. She was the best witch in the school for Transfiguration."

"And you can change faces."

November smiled, surprised. "Indeed. So it was a natural pairing that didn't involve the mess of Polyjuice, But that was really the most interaction I had with her. My acquaintance with your father's circle has grown only recently."

"Professor Lupin seems glad for that."

November jerked a little, looking at him. There was a friendly but mischievous look in his eyes. She had met this kid twice and if it was _that _obvious maybe…

"Harry!" Sirius was in the door and Harry darted over to his godfather.

Everything seemed to hit her in a moment: hugging Weasleys, Harry and Sirius, the warmth of the kitchen, and Remus James Lupin. This was her home. In the chaos someone took her hand and she felt herself being Apparated. When she opened her eyes she was in the Alcove. Remus was at the door and ready to leave.

"I just wanted to help you get some space. I don't want to…" He searched for the right word but came up short. There wasn't really a word for what he wanted.

"Do you think I should stay?" November asked suddenly.

"I believe–"

"No. Give me your honest answer, Remus Lupin."

There was so much that question contained and he wasn't sure how to go about it. But she had asked for honesty and this he could give her.

"Oh, November, I wish you would."

She stared down at her hands, spinning the ring on her finger. "So do I. It's home here."

Remus felt light as a balloon. He didn't dare touch her but he wanted to spin her around. "So I'll be seeing you around?"

"Yes." She looked up and met him with a smile. "Yes, you will."


	9. Chapter 9: Coming to Blows

**Chapter 9: Coming to Blows**

"I'd be lying if I didn't admit I'm jealous."

"You can go for me. I'll give you my face and take your shift. I promise."

Tonks smiled down at November as she helped pin hair back in a fiery-red updo. "I'm too short. And I'm not at all winning."

November sighed heavily. "Yes, it's gotten me very far in life," she replied flatly, clasping her necklace.

"Where did you get that? It's lovely!"

"Lucius."

"See! That's what I'm talking about! No one gives me diamonds!"

November frowned at her reflection. Not that there was anything wrong with her appearance, but it was odd. He _had_ been nearly affectionate with her the last time she had seen him and sleeping with her had almost become secondary. Of course it was still there in the heat they exchanged at the end of the evenings together, but it was not primary. Why _was_ that?

"You can have it. I'm ready for this all to be done."

"Ready to settle down with a good man?" Tonks could barely keep the amusement out of her voice and November threw a makeup brush at her teasingly.

"Hush your mouth, girl."

"But you two are closer than ever! Don't you ever wonder…?"

November did wonder. But there was a wall there and she did not know why. Probably a combination of fear, insecurity, and Lucius Malfoy. And it was true that they were even closer. With the pain of the Diagon Alley experience behind them but the pleasure of it still at the forefront of their minds, their banter had turned to outright flirting. Not that it had ever been anything else, but now every conversation seemed laced with the possibility of more. All that was needed was for one of them to break through the wall…

"I should be going!" November said teasingly, breaking off her train of thought.

Nymphadora Tonks rolled her eyes and threw open the door to the room as November stepped into heels. "Ta da!" she announced loudly.

Remus and Sirius, Molly and Author were at the entryway when November hurried down. As Remus watched her talk to Molly, he could not help but take in her form in this dress. It was a deep plum, strapless and low in front and lower in back, with a short train following behind. Unembellished, the focus of it was November herself and her long, angular body.

"Lovely as always!" Molly cooed over her. "Tonks, you are a wonder with hair!"

"Hidden talent," grinned Tonks, pointing at her own currently turquoise hair.

"You'll be the belle of the ball," Sirius teased her.

"I hope to get in and out without any notice or incident. This is misery."

"Buck up!" chimed Arthur. "We've all been at the Ministry for years and none of us have ever gone."

"Or been on their wanted lists for years, as the case may be." Remus' comment earned him sniggers and helped him hide his nerves. He adjusted his own white tuxedo for the millionth time and reviewed their plans in his head.

This was an upper tier Ministry Ball to be held in a rather exclusive hall. Lucius Malfoy had of course invited 'Helena'. But it was almost certain that a number of Death Eaters would be there and it was uncertain how safe she would be alone. That was where Remus came in: he would be in disguise as a waiter and would keep a close eye on her, in case of emergency.

"Well, off you go! Eat as much as you can and try to enjoy the friendly people!"

November stuck her tongue out at Sirius before donning an expensive brocade coat and heading into the dark and the snow. Remus carried an umbrella over her, their feet crunching in the snow loudly in the muffled night. They stopped at the corner, hiding behind some trees.

"Anyone you would like to be tonight?"

"Malfoy." Remus blushed and tried to hide his face in shadow; the answer had popped out before he could contain it.

November tried to hide how pleased she felt and teasingly said, "That might be a bit obvious. Here…"

He could feel his face shifting. A scar stretched across his eye and he felt his jaw narrow and lengthen. His hair thickened and he felt his teeth lengthen.

"What on earth have you done?" The quality of his voice was even different from the new facial structure.

"I read a Muggle book where one of the guys looked like a fox and the other looked like a wolf. You're the first."

"Considering I'm already the second…" he replied gloomily.

Cold hands took hold of his face and his heart raced. She looked him dead in the eye. "Not to me you're not. Don't do anything stupid tonight, please. I know you like _Pemberly and the Persimmon _but I don't."

Remus smiled in spite of himself at the reference to that conversation; it felt like a lifetime ago.

"I've got to go now. I'll see you there."

There was a pop and she was gone.

With a sigh Remus folded up the umbrella and then he too vanished into the night.

* * *

><p>November had been asked to wait in the main hall. Lucius had reacted very favorably to the dress and his gift being worn with it, but had been called away quickly.<p>

November scanned the room absently, looking over the bookshelves, before turning and stifling a scream. Severus Snape stood not three feet from her.

"What the hell are you doing?" she demanded, angry at herself for scaring so easily.

But the only reply she received was to be taken roughly by the arm and lead down a series of corridors. As she hissed for him to explain to her what was wrong, he only pulled harder and moved faster. Finally, Snape stopped, listening. Nearby, somewhere to their right, November could hear Lucius speaking.

"What are you–"

He clapped a hand over her mouth and pressed his wand into her neck. "We don't have time for this. I do not care if you have grown accustomed to being Lucius' pet, there is actually a reason you are playing house and you are about to be of some use."

He released her roughly and she stared openly at him. Severus was always very focused but something was clearly wrong. "What is it then?"

He leaned close to her and spoke in a low, quick voice.

"You are aware I have been…commissioned by the Dark Lord for some purpose. I can now make it known that this purpose is to create a block for a sort of magical eye. As you know, the Dark Lord has taken up some form of residency in the Shrieking Shack. However, something is hidden somewhere within that space that would allow an outsider to see into it at will. Clearly, this is against his desires. There is also the possibility of a twin allowing vision into Malfoy Manor. It is believed to be some precious object that would be guarded but passed down surreptitiously."

The full importance of those last words hit November and she paled. "Titus…?"

"Was probably killed because he knew a bit too much about this. Yes."

November felt everything spin and she grabbed at Snape's robes. Severus was lucky and quickly caught November as she fell forward in a faint.

"_Mobilicorpus_." He murmured, using the spell to hold her on her feet. "Damn you, wake up!" He shook her and she groaned, waking. But there was more concern in his voice than anger. The pair paused; they could still hear Lucius.

"Listen," he hissed to her, helping to support her. "This is a less than opportune time for everyone, but I am to be moved to another location. It is short term and Lucius would not like me visiting you. _You_ must get this information back to the Order. Drink this."

A vial was shoved under her nose and she eyed it. She could not help but mistrust him, even if he had done quite a bit to help her.

"It will seal your memories until a day from now. Legilimency will not work on you, and you know that Lucius could read you like a book in the current state. Drink it!"

Grimacing she sucked down the liquid in the vial. It was awful. The pair froze; there were no more voices. Quickly, they dashed off through the corridors. Severus shoved her back into the main hall. "You're feeling ill. You need some air," he said quickly, more as a command than an observation, and then he was gone.

A few minutes later, Lucius entered to find November stretched out on a chaise and looking ill.

"Are you quite alright?" he asked, taking her hand in his own and feeling her forehead lightly.

"I'm feeling ill. I just need some air." She found herself repeating Severus' words nearly verbatim.

"In that case, the sooner we leave the better. The air _is_ a bit close in here."

* * *

><p>Once November had recovered sufficiently from both the worry and shock of Severus' news, she did all she could to play her part. She was introduced to several witches and wizards that gave her some alarm, causing her to hope that they would not recognize her from her days in the Ministry. But a certain figure kept creeping into the corners of her vision and it calmed her and gave her strength.<p>

* * *

><p>Remus was in agony. The more he watched the more he did not want to watch, but the more he could not look away. To see her on the arm of that man…it almost made him choke. The feeling was so strong and yet there was no name for it. No, that was not true. If he was honest with himself he was jealous.<p>

He watched Malfoy move through the room, arms and hands continually on November, and November herself looking so very pleased. Of course she was acting; he knew that. But they were such a handsome pair and Malfoy held her so tenderly and so constantly. And Remus wanted to grind each of the glasses on his tray into that smug face.

He ducked back into the kitchens for a new tray of drinks and paused as the word came back to him. Jealous. He was horribly and sickeningly jealous. But what did it mean? She was his friend. But even as he thought that a flood of moments came to mind with much stronger feelings attached to them. He took his tray and nearly dropped it as another word slammed into his mind.

Love.

"I love her," he murmured. He had always known it and yet…Fear had so long pushed that word out of his vocabulary. "Of course I do!"

The last bit had come out quite loudly and now people were staring at him. "Just some arsehole telling me how t' do my job," he grunted, by way of explanation. Everyone nodded and smiled and went back to what they were doing.

Remus held his head in one hand, still in disbelief of how obvious it was. He loved her. He loved her so very deeply that he would do anything, anything at all to make that clear to her. He forced himself to be calm and rational; he needed to do his job still.

As he reentered the room he saw Lucius Malfoy whispering into November's ear. She nodded, looking at him seductively through her eyelashes, and the pair quietly exited the room through a door leading to a darkened corridor. Remus' pulse quickened and he heard a whooshing sound as blood rushed to his head. A very stupid idea entered his mind and, even more stupidly, he acted on it without question.

Following them quietly he continued to carry his tray of drinks. He silently entered the hall to find Lucius Malfoy covering November's neck and chest with kisses. One hand held hers and the other was wrapped around her waist. November's eyes were closed but her face was grim, as one enduring something painful. Lucius stood straight, pressing himself against her, and her facial expression changed instantly to one of pleasure.

Remus could feel the blood coursing through every part of his body, fast and furious. Without thinking, he acted.

The tray he held tipped forward as he pretended to trip over Lucius' robes. Six or seven full glasses of white wine poured over the expensive, tailored robes, tumbling off of Lucius' shoulders and rolling down his back, and Remus listened withs satisfaction to the sound of the thin glass crunching as it hit the ground.

"Ah'm sorry! Ah thought this was the kitchens–" But he did not finish his lie.

Several things happened at once and by the end of the flurry of movement none of the three were where they had begun. Lucius spun faster than Lupin expected; his fist connected with Remus' jaw and Remus was thrown across the hall by the force. November sensed instantly that something had to be done; if Lucius was left to mete out the punishment on his own it would be much worse for Remus. Throwing herself between the two, she drew her wand pointing it directly at him. Lucius was breathing hard but waited, watching November. He could not tell what she was about to do, but she was shaking and her face was red. However, Remus interpreted what Lucius took as extreme anger very differently. In her eyes there was a wild fear, almost panic. Only then did it strike Lupin how stupid he had just been and how she had specifically asked him to not do anything stupid.

With a silent spell, a wave of memory slammed into Remus, physically knocking him back down. All the better, for it looked to Lucius as if he were being tortured by November. But Remus watched as Fenrir Greyback leered, as Lucius Malfoy threatened, and as Lucius whispered that he needed to talk: all November's memories and all piecing together into a warning Remus.

November wanted desperately to apologize for what she was about to do but of course she could not. "_Catapultas corpus__!_"

Remus Lupin shot from the corridor, smashing through the door at the end, flying through the air, and landing in a heap in the ballroom. It looked as if he had been launched from a trebuchet. There was a loud crunch as a table broke his fall. November restrained herself as best as she could, forcing a calm face. She stared until she saw him moving, then went to Lucius.

Lucius was grinning broadly at her and paused from magically removing the wine from his midnight blue robes and trousers. "That was rather vicious, my dear."

"Oh? And what would you have done?"

His eyes twinkled at her. "Suffice to say he would have learned to be more careful."

"And why should I miss out on all the fun?" November cooed, draping herself on his arm. She could vaguely hear Remus limping away and she silently rejoiced. "Shame is a powerful motivator."

"And therein lies your cruelty," he replied kissing her, a much tamer kiss. "The power over emotion. Which conveniently leads to my original intentions, though this may not be the best place for it any longer."

White-coated waiters were hurrying over to clean up the mess. Lucius whispered for her to meet him on the upper walkway of the ballroom and darted away down the corridor. November again rejoiced silently that he was not so brazen as to walk out of the dark with her. Helena had no shame but November did. She could feel shocked eyes on her as she passed through the main room, but she ignored them as best as she could and hurried up to the walkway. Let them think her cruel and petty; Remus was safe.

In a few minutes, Lucius appeared at her side. "As I was saying," he began, as if he had always been right there. "I feel it would be best if I were to inform you myself of what I am about to say. It would be regrettable if my…cohorts were to inform you before I was able."

November could not believe what she was hearing and her surprise must have shown.

"I see you guess my purpose. Indeed, in spite of myself I find that I have feelings for you, Helena. But I would wager a guess that this was your intent all along."

November forced her brain to work. "But of course. What other reason is there for refusing to go to bed with Lucius Malfoy?"

He smiled at her and kissed her hand. "As I guessed. Well, it has worked."

"How fortunate."

"You would still be coy with me?" He seemed legitimately surprised. "I have given you the truth of my feelings which is not my main trade, as you know."

She leaned on the rail looking over the party below, not answering him. He watched her closely, not able to read her expression.

"What is it that you want, Helena?"

"I just don't know."

Lucius watched her, surprised. She had replied with such great force and conviction.

"Then I suppose I will have to try my best to help you decide," he answered smoothly before pulling him to her in a kiss.

* * *

><p>"You did WHAT?"<p>

"I know."

"Are you out of your bloody mind?"

"I know…"

Sirius cursed loudly and began to pace the kitchen. "And you're sure she's fine?"

"She snuck a Patronus off to me telling me to leave. Surely she would not do that unless she were fine?"

"And no one could imitate that?"

"I know her voice. I know…everything about her. Sirius…"

He stopped pacing and stared at Remus. "You've finally realized you love her."

Remus nodded miserably. "I didn't think it was possible. I mean I have always been attracted to her and had some feelings for her but…it's so much _more_ than that. I would do anything–"

"Obviously," Sirius interrupted, scoffing. "Am I right in assuming that is what prompted this idiocy?"

Remus nodded again. His face was still in transformation and it was swollen, both where he had been punched and where it had hit the door. He was fairly certain he had broken his wrist and he had an impressive gouge in his calf. He only hoped November would be willing to heal him when she returned. He was afraid to let Sirius try in his current temper. So he was shocked when these reflections were interrupted with loud laughter from Sirius Black.

"Have you gone soft in the head?"

"No," Sirius managed, chocking down his barking laugh. "I just thought 'I wish James were here.' He would have given anything to see the day Moony lost his head over a witch and was thrown through a door on account of it!"

Even Remus could not help but smile. He had always been the sensible one and indeed this situation was much more suited to James or Sirius.

"But what do I _do_?"

The front door slammed loudly enough to shake the walls.

"I think you better watch out to begin with, mate."

November stormed into the kitchen, a flurry of snow and furious looks. With a wave of her hand, Remus felt his face return to normal. But before either could even greet her, she had socked Remus in the eye with all her might. A barrage of punches began to rain down on him and, crying out for help, Remus did what he could to fend her off without hurting her. Sirius quickly raced behind her and pinned her arms to her sides, lifting her off the ground as she shrieked at him. Only when she had been removed completely to the other end of the room could Sirius get anything sensible from her.

"Idiot!" she screamed. "Do you know what that fool did?"

"He actually was filling me in before you flew in here like a bat out of hell!" Sirius shouted back. "What was _that_?"

"He deserved it! He deserved it and more!"

Remus gaped at her, too surprised to defend himself. Here he had been telling Sirius about how much he loved her and she had just punched him in the eye! And he was convinced it would blacken, as it had already begun to throb.

"But WHY?" Sirius' roar filled the room, grabbing her by the shoulders and forcing her to look him in the eyes.

"Because if he's going to get himself killed it had best not be while I'm there!" she screamed back. "That idiot has no idea what could have happened and I can't even think–" November broke down completely, covering her face with her hands and her shoulders shaking as she cried.

Even Sirius had not been expecting that. The men stared at each other, mouths agape.

"You have no idea what you put me through, Remus John Lupin, and if you ever do that again I'll never speak another word to you! I swear I will not!" As she spoke her eyes burned at him.

Sirius quietly reached out and placed his hand on her shoulder. She jumped a bit but allowed him to put his arm around her until she had calmed.

"It was a horribly stupid thing. I know it was. But I had no idea…" Remus joined them, limping over and leaning against the countertop, and though he knew there was more to say he did not know how to say it.

"This appears to be a matter for the two of you to settle. I'll leave you to it." With a wink at Remus, Sirius left them alone.

In the silence that followed, November sniffled, the fire crackled, and the clock in the next room ticked loudly. Quieter than a thought, November snuggled under Remus' arm, resting her head in the crook of his shoulder. He lay his swollen face against her head and wrapped her in his arms, gingerly guarding his wrist.

"You can't fight for me, Remus," she murmured, finally breaking the silence. "He cannot be fought without someone paying the price and I'd kill you myself before I'd leave you at his mercy. I swear I would." November turned her face to his and Remus could see she was completely serious.

"Then I can't look out for you anymore, 'Vember. It kills me to see it." His voice shook more than he meant for it to and he coughed to clear the emotion from it.

She looked fixedly at his sweater and pulled at a loose thread. "Maybe that's for the better. You know I'd rather it be you than anyone else but…I don't want you to see it. It's just so sordid."

She began to tear up again and Remus did his best to comfort her, reassuring her that he did not see this as her fault or her true self. She nodded weakly and started to leave for bed before catching herself.

"You're hurt. Do you want me to heal you?"

"If you can."

His answer was so ambiguous and so obviously intended to be so that it seemed to hang in the air between them. There was another long silence as she watched him wearily, battling with herself.

"I would like to try," she answered, so quietly he was almost unsure he had heard it. It was an equally ambiguous answer with equal amounts of meaning. She pulled out her wand and began to mend his wounds.

* * *

><p><em>My, wasn't I productive! Two chapters so close together! This can only mean one thing! A climax is in sight!<em>

_Reviews get excerpts! _


	10. Chapter 10: Like a Blazing Bonfire

_Notes up here to not ruin the feel of the chapter! This is where the M rating is earned so be forewarned. Also, I desire reviews! Further chapters will be postponed until more reviews are given! :-) And finally, the title is from Desire's section of Endless Nights. (If you have not read Sandman you must!)_

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 10: Like a Blazing Bonfire<strong>

November was waiting when Albus entered 12 Grimmauld Place.  
>"Headmaster? May I have a word?"<p>

"I have long since been your headmaster, my dear," he replied, smiling gently at her. "But of course you may."

The pair walked quickly up to the library and November, sparing no detail, began to explain what had happened at the ball.

Lupin had known he was in trouble the minute the door closed to the library. He had been behind a stack of books and the longer he waited the more awkward he knew his presence would be. And then there was also the revelation that Lucius had real interest in 'Helena.' Remus' attention was caught and what followed was even more valuable to him.

"Albus, I would like to end this but I do not know how. It seems that everything has come to a central point and that to pull out now would only endanger Severus, whom we need most of all and whom I have no desire to harm. Do you have _any_ advice for me?"

Remus could have sworn Dumbledore looked directly at him but it was to quick to tell.

"I have a question, dear November, that I would like you to consider."

"Yes?"

"Are you sure this has no connection to anything else in your life? I do not argue with any point you have raised and indeed if I believed we could disentangle you from Lucius Malfoy I would do so. However, there may be a path to finding what you actually desire."

"I'm sorry, sir, but I don't understand you."

"Remus–"

"Made it clear quite some time ago that there was no possibility."

"Surely you do not believe that?"

There was a long silence and Remus began to believe they had left when he finally heard November break the silence.

"But I've ruined it. How could I ask him to take me now?"

Dumbledore rested a hand on her shoulder. "That you must ask him, dear. I'll join you in a moment. Go on and let the others know about Severus' information."

The door to the library closed and Remus waited. When he stood he found himself face to face with Albus.

"I do trust that you will use what you have learned for the best, Professor Lupin?"

"Of course, sir."

Blue eyes twinkled behind half-moon glasses. "I would hope so."

* * *

><p>November had finish recounting Severus' information to the Order when Lupin decided it would be a surreptitious time to slip into the room. Sirius waved him over to a spot by him and as he sat Moody was questioning November.<p>

"Now," Alastor's magical eye stood still, focused on her, "if it is as you say, surely Titus would have given you the object before he died. Or mentioned some such thing to you."

November explained that she had tried everything she could think of and no memory came to mind. Titus had only bought a few things of great cost in their time together and charms revealed none of them were spelled.

"Well, damn," the older man thumped his stick against the floor and November could not help but smile.

"No kidding, Alastor. Still, I'll keep working on it. You never know."

The conversation changed over to a situation out in the country. There had been Death Eater activity on one of the heaths outside the city and it was suspected that the Death Eaters were working on recruiting magical creatures. Order members were needed to stake out in a house on the heath for a few days in the coming week.

The meeting adjourned for food and Sirius managed to catch Dumbledore's eye. The two men met in the entryway, with Albus wearing a wry smile.

"And how my I help you, Sirius?"

"You have to assign November and Remus to that house."

Albus gave him a mock-surprised look. "And why them, Mr. Black?"  
>"They will never deal with what we can all see as long as I'm here or there is somewhere else they can hide."<p>

Dumbledore smiled at the protective tone in Sirius' voice. "Are you asking me to interfere in other's personal affairs?"

"Why would I even dream of asking you to isolate two people who clearly have some issues to sort out and are driving me ABSOLUETLY mad?" Sirius exclaimed sarcastically.

An outright smile broke across Dumbledore's face. Without a word he turned and walked back to the group. Some time after Sirius had snuck back into the room, it was announced that Remus and November would be stationed on the heath. It was the most convenient and it would put space between November and Lucius for the time being.

Molly read the expression on November's face expertly. "November dear, why don't you take this through to the kitchen."

The younger woman quickly took the proffered dish and scooted into the kitchen. Remus watched her for a moment before exiting through the hall.

November was working on a glass of fire whisky when Remus appeared.

"Stiff drink for dinner."

"Trying to get my head to shut up."

He smiled a bit sadly at her. "Does it work?"

"On occasion."

Gently taking the glass from her he downed the rest of it in one draw and smiled at her sheepishly. "Here's to shutting up noisy thoughts."

She grinned at him and he leaned against the counter next to her.

"Does it bother you?" he asked quietly. "The 'stake out?'"

"Did you ask him to do that?"

He met her eyes evenly. "No. You?"

"No."

There was silence between them and November stared off at the dining room door. On the other side, Sirius' barking laugh rang out. In an instant it both occurred to them who was responsible.

"Padfoot," murmured November with a laugh.

"I can talk to him. I can tell him –"

"Don't," she interrupted softly. Her hand rested on his. "I don't mind."

Remus looked into her face with a clear look that gave away no emotion.

"If there's anyone I have to be cooped up with for a week in the middle of nowhere, I'd rather it be you than anyone else." His voice was mellow and joking but the sentence ended with a serious undertone. November looked away, smiling. "We should get back to the others."

She nodded and they left together.

* * *

><p>"Oh wow…" November didn't try to hide her surprise at the smallness of the farmhouse they were to stay in. She let go of the Portkey, a beaten umbrella, and hiked her backpack up further on her shoulders.<p>

"Indeed. But it's quaint," joked Remus.

"Not exactly my first choice for the first place to live in after the Black Home. But it _is_ better than the Black Home."

Remus nodded and the two of them closed the distance between them and the house. When they began to explore it they found that the bathroom had no door (though mercifully the loo did), the water came from a well next to the house, there was one bedroom with one bed, and there was no electricity.

"I thought of that," November began, reaching into her bag. She pulled out a bundle of firewood, and Remus knew he shouldn't be surprised even though he was.

They were able to build a fire quickly, which was fortunate as the winter evening was darkening already. Mercifully, there was food in the icebox and pantry for them, as well as a gas stove.

"Here, can you peel potatoes?" November pulled out a sack of golden skinned potatoes and rummaged in a drawer before producing a peeler.

"But of course."

The pair hung up their robes on hooks in the hall, and rolling up their sleeves began to cook together. It was hardly the first time this had happened, but now, alone with their feelings and each other, it took on a different tone altogether. It was more intimate and more personal.

The evening was spent in idle chitchat before Remus inevitably produced a book and November began to work on a charm that would allow her to change hair color much faster and with less concentration.

"What are you reading?" she asked, pointing her wand dramatically at her temple.

"_The Unbearable Lightness of Being_. Muggle book."

"How does it read?"

"Philosophical but very accessible."

"Read it out loud?"

Her voice was so pleading that it was obvious she had no interest in what she was starting on. He could not help but agree.

Over the pages of his book he could see her hair, flashing red and then slowly growing back to the rich brown. It seemed as if the color was actually leaking out of the ends of her hair and Remus almost expected to see a pool of red around her. It was immensely clear that her heart was not in her magic.

"I quit!" November announced half an hour later. "I hate him and I'm tired of thinking about him!"

Her words were fierce and she threw her wand blindly. Remus was lucky enough to deflect the projectile it without breaking it using his book as a shield. She apologized profusely and gathered her wand back up as she joined him on the couch.

"Here," she held out her hand. "Let me."

"You don't have to. You're–"

She stopped him by giving him a look and he handed her the book. "I just don't want to think right now and this book is interesting. Indulge me."

"If you insist."

A blush spread across her cheeks at the tone of voice included in that comment but it was mostly hidden in the low light. "Here. You're always supporting my dead weight."

She scooted to one end of the couch and leaned his head against her leg. Absently she brushed hair out of his face and his eyes locked with hers. Everything seemed to melt around them. Picking up the book she began to read aloud.

It was some time before she realized that Remus had not stirred in ages. Looking down it was clear why. He was dead asleep. She suppressed a giggle and closed the book. He was so very handsome and the dying fire accented his jaw, his salt and pepper hair, and his scars. November absently traced one with her fingertip but she jumped when his hand closed around hers.

"Sorry."

"Not at all," he mumbled sleepily. "I've always enjoyed your touch."

Her stomach flipped and she gently stood, lowering his head on the couch. With a wave she began to levitate him off of the couch.

"Put me down."

It was a direct command and it was clearer than his first comment had been. She lowered him back on the couch.

"But why? The couch is uncomfortable."

"Which is why you will be in the bed and I will be on the couch."

"But your old bones might not be able to handle it."

"Do not put me in that bed unless you intend on joining me in it." For the first time his eyes opened and they focused clearly on her. It was one-third challenge, one-third request, and one-third declaration.

November's heart was pounding loudly, so loudly she would have sworn Remus could hear it.

"Very well."

Her words were soft but he heard them with perfect clarity. A thrill raced through him; that was not what he had expected. Rising slowly, he followed November at a short distance to the one bed in the house. It was large, gleaming brass with thick blue quilts.

Standing with her back to him, November slowly pulled off her sweater, leaving on her tanktop underneath. Remus followed suit by also shedding a layer, letting his sweater drop to the floor quietly. She then slipped out of her jeans, quietly pulling on pajama pants. Remus checked his conscious by telling it that if she did not want him to see her fine legs she would not show them to him like this; it wasn't as if this were the first time he had ever seen them anyway. November remained facing away from Remus as she pulled her hair up in a loose ponytail but she was very aware of the sound of him undressing and dressing in pajamas as well. The question 'what are you doing?' flashed through her mind but she stuffed it away; she didn't care what she was doing, she just wanted to be doing _something_.

As they faced each other the heat increased. November could read the desire clearly on his face and she wanted him badly. But she wanted more than sex from him as well and he had always played those cards so close to his chest that she no longer knew how he felt.

"Shall we?"

Remus was following her lead and slipped into the cozy bed after her. He was surprised to feel her pull him close to her, fitting his body against her in the same S-curved shape. Her exposed shoulders and back pressed against his naked torso and she wrapped his arms around her waist.

November could feel his heart pounding as his arms held her tightly to him and a flash of daring ignited her. She turned her face to his.

"A goodnight kiss…"

She pressed her lips to his own dry lips. Remus was momentarily frozen by delight and surprise. However, he quickly unfroze, kissing her back. Their passion flared and only after realizing Remus was effectively on top of her did November's better sense kick in.

She did not want it like this, as if it were some one-night-stand with neither parties sure where the other stood or what would come next. With all of the will power within her, November pulled away.

"Goodnight."

Remus' eyes reflected his confusion as he gently slid back onto his side. He watched as she rolled over, facing away from him and tucking the covers close around her. She did not ask him to leave and he felt no pressure from her to do so, so he quietly settled in for sleep. His mind absently felt around for the cause of her distance.

Clearly they desired each other. Every flaming instinct in his body told him that. But what was she waiting for? After all, he loved her and –

He jolted awake suddenly. He had never told her that. Never once had he ever told her he loved her. He had indicated it in a thousand different ways but he had never, ever told her…He kicked himself inwardly as he thought more about this. If November wanted sex, it was readily available to her in the form of Lucius Malfoy, a much more attractive and wealthy wizard than himself. But that wasn't what she wanted; she wanted Remus and she wanted his love.

And though he was furious at the doubt his own insecurity had planted in her mind, this realization filled him and he drifted off to sleep.

* * *

><p>Remus awoke, stiff and feeling older than ever. But a wonderful smell was somewhere nearby and his stomach growled loudly. He opened his golden eyes slowly and found November's face inches from his own.<p>

"Merlin's Beard!" he yelled, jerking away from her wildly, arms flailing.

Her laugh rang out and he could not help but smile. It had been a while since she had laughed like that and he was suddenly glad they were in this tiny cottage.

"You can't do that to me, 'Vember. I'm too old and you'll give me a heart attack."

"On the contrary, I am strengthening your heart." She was grinning at him and then walked from the room to the kitchen. "Just wait there and I'll be back."

He calmed his heartbeat, still smiling when she returned. She brought in two plates of food – bacon, eggs, and toast – and silently levitated his legs. He gave her an impressed look. She had been working on wandless magic ever since the fall and she was much better at it. She sat on the bed, leaning against the wall, and let his legs fall across her lap before handing him his plate.  
>"Breakfast in bed," she explained, cheerfully. November rested her plate on his legs and happily began to eat. Remus watched her, only half noticing his food. Everything felt in place right now. The two of them curled up together. November smiling and laughing again.<p>

November started when she realized he was staring at her. "Everything okay?"

"Oh! Yes! Sorry. I was…distracted."

"My apologies. I know I'm rather terrifying," she teased. "I'll shower soon enough and then you can get ready as well. We need to walk the perimeter today so I thought we should get going early."

"But of course." Remus smiled and began to eat, trying to focus on the reason they were even here.

* * *

><p>After dishes had been done and put away, November hurried off for a shower. They had agreed to try and give as much privacy as possible and so Remus settled into the couch with his book.<p>

"Um, Remus…" November's voice had a nervous tone to it.

Remus looked up from the couch. He could see clearly into the bathroom from where he sat. It had a large clawfoot tub and he noticed instantly what the problem was. The only shower curtain they had was opaque.

November looked at him, then back at the curtain, then back at him. "I suppose you'll just have to look somewhere else. Sorry."

"Not at all."

Blushing, she stepped into the tub, pulling the curtain closed around her. Remus was good at first. He dutifully stared at his book, though the sounds of her undressing were driving him wild. The problem came when he looked up to check the time.

Her figure was blurred but he could still see the lovely shape of her body, more than he had seen the night before. Her dark hair cascading down her back and dripping with water. Her long legs and thin torso. Her breasts… He knew he should look away but it was entrancing to watch her. The shower shut off and he jumped, grabbing his book and holding it in front of his face. After a minute he realized it was upside down and flipped it quickly.

"I'm coming out. I'll just run into the bedroom, okay?"

"Of course."

He heard her pad by on bare feet and he allowed himself to look around. No sight of her. With an inward sigh of disappointment, he moved to the bathroom and began to undress for his own shower.

November had finished drying her hair and pocketed her wand. The house was warmer now that they had kept the fires going consistently. She was busy in her own thoughts when she found herself passing by the bathroom. She had only meant to peek but she was soon staring.

She had always known Remus was thin, but even through the curtain she could see that he was lean and muscular. His shaggy hair was plastered to his head and his back was to her. His thighs were tight and she could make out several scars running across his back. She drank in the blurred sight of his naked skin, rippling and sleek with water.

He began to turn to wash the shampoo out of his hair and she darted away quickly, blushing deeply.

* * *

><p>It was night before the smallness of their current living space began to really get to November.<p>

"I'm going to loose my mind," she groaned loudly, falling over dramatically on the floor where she sat. "Is there truly nothing to do in here?"

"Do not tell me you forgot to bring your board games," Lupin drawled. A pen smacked him in the face and he stuck his tongue out at her playfully. "I did notice a large storage space off of the bedroom."

"Perfect! Let's explore!"

Before he knew it Lupin was being dragged through the house and into the walk-in closet.

"Wow…" November breathed, looking at all of the boxes in the space. Half of them were labels Christmas or decorations but one thing in particular quickly caught November's attention.

"Hold me up!"

Obediently, Remus lifted November high enough for her to reach the top shelf. She became suddenly heavier and he put her down quickly. "What on earth–?"

"A Muggle radio!" November quickly heaved the large contraption off into the living room, placing it by the fire. She murmured a charm at it and it snapped to life, playing the station it had been set to last, with the added crackle of static.

Piano greeted them and a wave of impulsivity washed over Lupin. With an exaggerated bow he held his hand out to November.

"Would the lady dance?" November looked hesitant and so he persisted. "You did say you were bored."

"Alright," she whispered, her long hand slipping into his easily.

_You've been on my mind _

_I grow colder every day _

_Lose myself in time just thinking of your face_

_God only knows why it's taken me so long_

_To let my doubts go you're the only one that I want_

Remus held her close and November rested her head on his shoulder. The song was slow and they danced slowly through the small living room. She breathed in the scent of books and soap and coffee and he breathed in the clear smell of citrus and soft skin. They knew the feel of each other's bodies well and yet there was so much more to learn.

_I don't know why I'm scared_

_I've been here before_

_Every feeling every word _

_I've imagined it all_

Dramatically, Remus spun her out and she laughed. She spun back into his arms, playfully swishing her hair around him. Her off-the-shoulder sweater was getting away from her and refusing to cooperate. She glowered at it and Remus took his opportunity. Carefully, his hand slipped under the sweater and he lifted it slowly over her head. With this move the tone of the dance changed dramatically. His lips brushed her shoulders and neck before she pulled off his sweater as well, tossing it aside.

_I dare you to let me be your one and only _

_Promise I'm worthy to hold in your arms_

_So come on and give me a chance _

_To prove that I'm the one that can _

_Walk that mile until the air stops_

Remus sighed into November's shoulder as she kissed his neck. Her tongue teased playfully at his ear and his spine went ramrod straight, gripping her to him ardently.

Their eyes locked and each seemed to stop breathing. Slowly the song and their dance drew to a close around them. With a flick, Remus silenced the radio before some other song would jar them out of the current mood. November's heart was racing and she knew with certainty that Remus would kiss her now. But even after all of this time she doubted he knew what he wanted.

"Remus–"

The questioning, hesitant tone in her voice frustrated him the perfect amount. He had long needed some outside push into honesty and now he reacted.

"November, I _love_ you!" It had come out louder than he had meant but her face showed she understood the sincerity of his words. "I have always loved you and I have been a terrible coward. But I cannot pretend any longer."

He reached out and took her face in his hands. The air seemed to be charged with electricity.

"And I know you love me too," he whispered.

Their lips met, a long sweet melting kiss. But there was far too much that had been put off for far too long for it to remain simply a kiss. Their lust intensified quickly and the couple grasped at each other, breathing heavily as their tongues tangled sweetly.

Remus held her tightly around the waist and with one hand behind her neck as she twined her fingers through his thick hair. Urgently he pulled her tanktop over her head, throwing it aside as their skin pressed together again.

They moved throughout the cottage, working their way back toward the bed they had shared.

* * *

><p>Silence fell around them and they worked to catch their breath. Their eyes met and a glowy smile grew across November's face. Remus knew he looked like a fool but he could not stop the hazy grin he wore.<p>

From the other room, a ticking clock could be heard.

Remus opened his mouth to speak but November covered it with her hand, smiling but indicating no desire to talk. She left the bedroom and moments later he heard the shower running. He followed her and stepped into the huge tub with her. Water had already soaked her hair and she turned her back to him. Understanding the silent request, Remus worked some shampoo through her hair and after the suds were washed out she did the same for him. Silently, she placed charms across his scratched up back, not healing them entirely but lifting the pain; if he had to wear scars let them be left from her in passion.

The pair dried themselves before November took Remus by the hand. Without words, she led him back to their bed and, climbing in after him, curled up to him, bending their bodies in the shape of an S.

With a giddy smile and his arms around the woman he loved, Remus Lupin drifted into sleep.


	11. Chapter 11: Taking Things Slowly

**Chapter 11: Taking Things Slowly**

November woke feeling something was off. A quick glance told her she was naked and that was indeed one of the oddnesses. Another glance told her Remus was gone.

Her heart sank as she simultaneously remembered their amazing first time together and realized she was waking up the morning after alone. But someone was humming in the kitchen and the smell of breakfast wafted in to her. She sat up, her hair wavy from sleeping with it damp, and saw a tidy pile of clothes on her backpack. Everything she had been wearing the night before was magically repaired and folded for her.

With a smile, she dressed in jeans and a tight shirt. Clearly there needed to be a discussion and this gave her hope that things would go well.

Remus was in the kitchen working on pancakes when someone's arms slipped around his waist. A roar of surprise tore from him and November shot halfway across the room.

"Merlin's Beard! I'm sorry!"

November stared for a moment and then laughed loudly. "It's my fault. I forget you scare easily."

"I made us breakfast." His words were shy but extremely sincere. The use of 'us' made her stomach erupt into girlish butterflies.

She was serves pancakes and bacon before Remus sat beside her. "I think there is a conversation we should have, November."

"Have you eaten?" she cut him off.

"No. I think–"

"Eat first."

His eyebrow went up in amusement. "And why?"

"Because you should eat before any important decision."

Looking at him she wanted to jump on him afresh. His hair was even more wild than usual and he had a five o'clock shadow on his normally clean-shaven face.

Remus reached over and took her face in one hand, stroking her cheek with his thumb. "Very well."

It was a very quiet meal, both of their minds racing with thoughts, feelings, worries and doubts. After what seemed like ages, Remus began the conversation again.

"I have tried to think of what I would like to say. Would it trouble you if I began?"

November shook her head, trying not to hurk; in her mind, he was the wild card and she had no idea how he had reacted to last night.

"I would like to begin with Diagon Alley and move forward from there, because I see that as the crux of the matter. When I told you that it was a cover, this was complete bullshit. I could have taken you then and there, against that very wall without any hesitation. It was the highest point in my life since realizing Sirius did not kill James! But my self-control was too poor and…I was too embarrassed to be honest about this."

November's eyes widened at him, and he blushed but pushed on.

"When I said I love you I meant it. You have changed my life from the day you moved in and the thought of you being removed from my life in any way…" He coughed to clear this throat. "When I thought you were moving in with Tonks I felt as though my life was over. You have been my closest friend and I love you, perfections and annoyances and all."

He leaned forward and took her hands. "But if this new relationship will change any of this for you, I would rather have none of it. I cannot bear to lose you and I would give up all of the blissful nights with you before I would damage any affection you may have for me!"

November couldn't look him in the eye she was so overcome with emotion. She had not expected this.

"And as much as it pains me to do so, I must give you warning. You know full well what I am and this will never end. It would haunt us always."

She looked up quickly, her eyes burning. "You know full well I do not care whatsoever about that. That will never change."

A weary smile broke across Remus' face and years seemed to lift off of him. "I was so hoping you would say that. There is however, the risk of any child–"

"I thought that might come up," November interrupted, sitting forward. "If you do not mind the interruption, I have my own 'confession' of sorts." She paused taking a deep breath. "I cannot and never will be able to bear you a child."

Remus' eyes widened now. "How…?" He wasn't sure if he should ask but his curiosity was piqued.

"In a rather horrid twist of fate, my womb is heart shaped. So as endearing as that sounds, I can never carry a child without harming the child, perhaps fatally. So now…" She sighed heavily. "If ever you were to want a child, I am not the woman for you."

Remus jumped to his feet before sitting again hastily and taking hold of her hands again. "November, a child is my very greatest fear! While I would never ask for anything at such a cost…"

"It does not bother you?"

"Of course not."

November met his eyes uncertainly. "You are the only one I desire and the only one I wish to be with. But you must understand that Lucius is now too close and too involved to get rid of. I can't just end this without hurting others."

Remus' eyes dropped and he nodded. November felt as though she were choking but did not show this. He had a right to react as he wished; this was horrible news.

"I will never have sex with Lucius Malfoy. I can promise you that with certainty even if I cannot give you more. I despise him."

"You would promise that? Isn't that risky?"

"I've already promised myself that, because of you."

Slowly, Lupin took her hands and lifted them to his mouth, tenderly kissing them. A shiver went through November at the openness of that gesture. They had hidden away so much for so long and now was the first time they were really and truly able to give all of themselves to one another.

But Lupin still could not get past all of the reservations he had held onto for the majority of his life. "But November I'm still–"

He breathed in heavily as her lips collided with his, cutting off words. In a sweep of passion he tangled his hands in her hair, pulling her to him. November felt desire flare within her; she had never known he was so passionate. She could feel his hand sliding up her thigh and she smiled through their kiss.

With his forehead against hers, Remus spoke in a low, heavy voice. "Maybe…we should take this slowly?" He felt as though it was the right thing to offer, not wanting to pressure her though he wanted her deeply.

November tried to get a good look at his eyes, not at all convinced that's what they should do, but his shaggy hair blocked her. "Maybe…"

He sat back with a broad smile. "Please do not misinterpret this, but I cannot believe you are truly mine. After all this time."

Deciding to be playful, November crossed to him and sat lightly in his lap. "I am yours alone."

They kissed again, more sweet and lingering. "I love you, Remus."

"And I love you."

* * *

><p>Remus blushed a little. These past two nights had been a bit like unleashing a starving man. He wanted to touch and hold and taste and enjoy every part of her all at once, even as they lay curled up in sheets together. But a nagging doubt crept in and November watched his face fall a little.<p>

"What is it, Remus?"

"Could you ever…fall for Lucius?" Remus had a hard time even speaking the words. "I know you have promised things already," he hurried to add, "but you are always with him and he sends you gifts I could never dream of buying you and he is powerful and handsome and probably the girth of a firehose." November laughed at the last bit and Remus smiled half-heartedly. "And he's not mangled and terrible to look at."

Pain showed clearly in November's face and she sat up. "Remus…"

"If I lost you to him I would kill myself! I'd rather have you fall for Sirius than that self important asshole!"

"REMUS LUPIN!" The volume of her shout echoed through the quiet house and Remus stared. November took his face in both of her hands. "I understand that Lucius has many things to offer. But is your faith in me so little? Is your self-worth so little?"

November ran her hands over his scarred skin as she spoke. "I cannot express how I feel about your scars but mangled you are not. You are a _man_ and you have a _man_'s body. You have suffered and overcome so much and you wear the results of that. This is not just honorable but so deeply sexy. I would never fall for any less."

She lay on top of him, chin resting on his chest, and looked him directly in the eyes as she spoke. "I can't convince you. You have to believe me yourself. But, if it helps you, Lucius is sexist, purist, degrading to all not like him, and shallow, not to mention power-hungry and dangerous. I meant it when I said I would kill you before I would leave you at his mercy. He is less than human and you are far above him."

Remus watched her silently for a while, enjoying the sensation of her smooth, soft skin intertwined with his own. "Sexy?" he finally asked.

"From the very first time I saw you naked in the shower," she smirked at him.

He laughed aloud. "You watched me yesterday morning?"

"Of course. And you watched me."

Remus turned scarlet and began to explain but she stopped him with a smile. "I would have been disappointed if you had not. What a waste switching out the shower curtains would have been."

Remus goggled at her wordlessly as the impact of these words hit him. A silly grin spread across his face.

"Well then let me look again, my devious lover."

* * *

><p><em>Fluff chapter! Back to some plot next chapter.<em>

_Thank you everyone who commented! I do so love it! _


	12. Chapter 12: Attack

**Chapter 12: Attack**

November could not help but smile as Remus gathered her hair over one shoulder, focusing his lips on the other.

"You can try to distract me but this is serious," she spoke amusedly, turning to face him. She kissed him amorously before pushing him away from her. "Please."

The older man sighed and flopped into a chair at the small table. "I know it as well as you, 'Vember–"

"If not better."

"As you say. But why _now_? We shall have nary a second alone the moment we return to Grimmauld and now we have three more days completely alone together."

"But this is why we're here."

"Hardly the only reason…"

November blushed and turned away from him to stare out of the small window over the sink. "I would prefer if no one knew for a while when we get back. The timing just seems so…"

"Romantic comedy?"

"Exactly!" She spun back around grinning at him. This was one of the things she loved about Remus; he understood what she meant.

"I have no qualms with that. Why let Sirius believe he can mastermind our lives?"

"It _was_ a rather good idea, though," November admitted, a new sexy tone seeping through her words. He loved that new tone.

"Regardless," her voice became business-like again, "maybe we should send an owl to them. This is more than we expected. Go over it again for me: I'm still fuzzy on this."

"Kobolds and hobgoblins," Remus began to recite as if reading from a book. "More common out here in the countryside than somewhere like London. These lack the tiny amount of warm feelings our bankers possess. Now, the very idea that they would approach us is an alarm; it indicates that they are either looking for or expecting witches or wizards. The body we found is also indicative of something sinister. They are rather hard to get rid of and in the case of kobolds, take a massive amount of hatred. Both of these things seem to point clearly to Death Eaters."

In the back of November's mind something struck a chord. There was a noise…

"Now," he stood smoothly and wrapped his arms around her, "I must have you. We will owl first thing this evening."

Her ears pricked again as his lips worked with hers. "Remus! Stop!"

He stood back a little, surprised. "I'm sorry if–"

"Shhh! Listen!"

November had gone white and he listened, not moving a muscle. Then he heard it too. The sound of rushing wind. The sound of a flying pillar of smoke. The sound of a Death Eater landing nearby.

"Get down!" Remus dropped quickly and yanked November's arm with all his might. In her panic, she did not catch herself as he had expected she would and there was a thud as her face hit the edge of the sink.

But better that than a face full of fiery glass, for in the next moment the window where she had stood exploded and a pillar of fire burst into the room. Pulling both of them as close against the wall under the window as he could, Remus pulled out his wand to heal November. Her eye was swelling and it would be an impairment when they would need to fight.

"Leave it!" she shouted, over-loud. The explosion had buggered her hearing for the moment. "They can't recognize me!"

Remus was loath to leave her this way but he nodded before they rushed into the next room. Dropping down in front of the couch they were somewhat protected and could see out the windows. Two Death Eaters paced around the cottage, hooded and wands at the ready.

"Any ideas?" Remus whispered, turning to November. He jumped a little at her now white-blonde hair. She could have been related to Malfoy with hair like that.

"None. We'll just have to give it a go. Ideally, we fight them out there; this is about the worst place imagineable for a fight."

"The woods, then?"

November nodded and they grabbed hands. There was a crack and the pair of them reappeared in the wood that grew past a field next to the cottage. The Death Eaters, obviously hearing the sound, dove into the air in a swirling pillar of black smoke.

As best as they could, November and Remus attacked, using the field the Death Eaters were crossing to bolster their offense. Moments before they were to land, a hex of November's hit home. The Death Eater plummeted into the ground and bounced, rolling away. A crumpled mask and hood lay off to the side and long pale hair blanketed the ground around the prone man.

November gaped. How could it be Lucius? Of all the people in the wide wizarding world?

Remus's hand closed around hers and they tore away into the woods. "We've got to hide you!" he hissed to her as they ran.

"No! They'll kill you if you're alone!"

"And what do you think will be your fate if they find you here?" There was true panic in Remus's voice and November began to realize how deeply he felt for her.

A tree exploded above them and a branch crashed loudly between them. Diving to opposite sides, November and Remus managed to get away with only gashes from the branch.

Both now unmasked, the two Death Eaters walked slowly toward them. Digging in her robes, November threw a sweet into her mouth and tried not to choke on it in her panic. Remus gave her a confused look, still watching the Death Eaters.

Lucius Malfoy and Antonin Dolohov stopped meters away, wands ready and tensed to strike.

"I don't recognize you," Lucius drawled to November, pinning her with his gaze. "And I know every Ministry fool who follows Dumbledore."

"You wouldn't, you pompous fucking ass."

Remus's eyes went so big they looked like they would shoot out of his skull. Not only was this really the wrong time to provoke Lucius, but her voice was almost comically high. It sounded as though a cartoon character was telling Malfoy to f-off.

Lucius on the other hand turned purple. "How dare you, you bitch?" he raged, unable to find words for his wrath.

"I am already dead," November squeaked, preparing to strike. "There is a lot I will dare."

November's talent for unspoken spells gave her a priceless advantage. The ground under Lucius exploded like a landmine, throwing him into a tree and covering him in dirt. She grabbed Remus and the pair raced off to a small clearing; it would give Malfoy and Dolohov the same advantage that it would give them, but they had to get out of these trees.

From that moment on the spells were fast and thick. Remus tried again and again to come between November and Lucius but Dolohov, though he was unable to overpower Remus, was more than able to keep him from getting to November.

November on the other hand moved quickly and efficiently, ignited by her hatred for her 'lover.' Though Lucius was the more experienced duelist, November was far more angry and far more daring. If there was anything familiarity with Malfoy had given her, it was a knowledge of the patterns he used. She was able to anticipate to a degree what his next move would be and this often helped her.

But there was a clear downside to this that never entered her mind. As he fought, it became clear to Lucius that somehow this woman had fought him before or known him in some way. The insult was too personal and her attacks were too well placed and precise. But who could she possibly be…?

Inevitably, November grew sloppy in her defense and it was then that Lucius was able to trap her. Behind her grew a blackberry patch and Lucius forced her back until she found herself entangled in it, the thorns cutting her arms and legs and wrapping around her robes. A quick spell ensured that the thorns curled around her like pythons, squeezing until blood dripped from hundreds of different punctures.

Drawing closer to her, Lucius could not help but smile. To their right Remus was doing all he could to work his way over to her. Terrified, November said nothing; she only hoped that she had angered him enough to give her a clean death.

Lucius' wand came up.

If there was anything he could do, Remus had to act now. For November, it was a sacrifice he was willing to make.

"_Obliviate!_"

There was an explosion without sound. Then there was a scream of pain and Remus lurched forward, dropping clumsily.

Without realizing it, November was screaming and ripping the briars from her. Her foot caught and her head connected dully with a tree. Everything went black.

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><p><em>So I know this is a mini-chapter and horrible of me to leave you like this, but I could not resist!<em>

_Thank you for those of you who have been reviewing, especially DZAuthor and javalon14! _


	13. Chapter 13: Unlucky In Love

**Chapter 13: Unlucky in Love**

_Many excuses for the long wait for this chapter (end of school, outrageous sickness, etc.). Biggest one though is my uncertainty with this chapter. The way I ended the last chapter actually painted me into a corner in a way I was not expecting. The idea I had seemed very forced when I tried it and so I have this. I'm still not sure how I feel about it but hopefully you can forgive the first half if you hate it. Review and let me know!_

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><p>When November woke it was pitch black. Her head throbbed violently and when she tried to get up she felt sick. Her arms were covered in blood from hundreds of cuts and scratches and her face was swollen from crashing into the tree.<p>

But where was Remus?

November forced herself up, flooded with panic and saw Remus a small distance away, lying face down in a dark pool.

Unsure who or what was in the dark, November stifled a scream and stumbled over to him. Rolling him over, November was able to see a long gash from jaw to opposite hip. She knew whose spell this was and she felt sick. Wiping furiously, she cleared his face of blood. He was not breathing; her hair that hung in front of his face did not move with his exhaling. Tears began to pour from November's eyes.

If he had not tried to save her he would not be dead. The weight of this crashed down on her and she began to sob loudly, clinging to him. Sounds that were only half human wrenched from her. She had provoked Lucius and lost: she had lost the fight and she had paid the price of her lover.

After a time she pulled some thoughts together and realized that there was the very real possibility that Death Eaters were still out there. Stretching out her hand, November yelled, "_Accio Wand!_"

Her wand flew out of the bushes and into her hand. "_Lumos!_"

This time November screamed. There was a crater in the ground before her. Lifting her wand light, what November saw filled her with sickness. Lucius and Dolohov lay in the crater. Lucius' face was half raw skin and nerves and his shoulder was blown away; Remus' obliviate spell had hit him full on. Dolohov had only been knocked out, though his skull showed through the split skin.

"Then what was the explosion?" she murmured.

"Us." In the circle of wand light, a band of kobolds had surrounded her.

November shrieked again and her eyes locked with the speaker. "Why?"

"Tell us truthfully," it spoke clearly, voice like dry crackling leaves, "whose side do you lie on?"

"His." November tightened her grip on Remus, tears raining down on his face and her hands nervously smoothing his hair despite the fact that she was mostly just spreading blood through the brown waves. Though she had every allegiance to the Order, right now it was Remus she cared about.

The kobold nodded gravely. "That is truth. Now, witch, do not lie. The Dark Wizard: you know him well?"

She could only nod, her head pounding with the motion.

The kobold grunted approvingly and they began to speak among themselves. Finally they turned back to her. "You are honest and you have unintentionally spared us from the Death Eaters. They had been sent to destroy not only you, but all of us. We will do what we can for you and your lover. But it must also be done for the Death Eaters as well."

"What is it that you can do?" November voice cracked and she began to shake from crying so hard. "He's dead."

"We can undo what has been done."

November stared openly. "You could bring him back?"

"In a way. But they will be saved as well." It pointed at Malfoy. "That is how our magic works: all or none. You are intertwined."

November cursed inwardly. She would have traded her life for Remus to live again but to heal Malfoy and bring him back into all of this… "I would have killed him."

"As we shall if you refuse."

November ran her hands across the cold, dead skin of the man she loved. "Please…"

There was a sweeping wind. The trees groaned and creaked. November's hair whipped into her vision and spinning light forced her to close her eyes. When she opened her eyes again, she was standing in the kitchen, twenty minutes before Remus would die for her. She could hear him in another room and three kobolds stood before her.

"We must never be asked to join your war; our debt is repaid."

"You have my word. We owe you our lives."

The kobolds began to leave and stopped, facing November again. "You have saved The Dark Wizard too. Remember this."

November began to ask what on earth _that _meant but they were gone.

"REMUS!"

When he arrived in the room Lupin expected there to be a flood.

"What is it?"

November grabbed him, nearly faint with relief that he was not dead, and crushed him in a tight hug. When Remus stepped back there were tears in her eyes. He stroked her hair, pushing it out of her face and wondering when it became blonde. "What is it, my love?"

"I have to charm the house. You need to destroy it. Make it look as though we could not possibly be alive."

"But November–"

"You must!" she cried, grabbing his arms. Her eyes were wild. "We can fix it all later; you know that. Please!"

Remus nodded silently and began blowing out the windows as November raced outside. Any and every charm she could think of for protection she threw at the house. She built invisible walls around it. She threw repelling charms around it. She domed it in a thick invisible fog of nightmares. When she finally felt that this was enough she threw flames from her wand, charring the outside of the cottage.

Racing indoors she left the door open, freezing cold air trailing after her. Remus had torn things up convincingly, largely by dueling with himself.

"Lie down," November whispered, pulling him down.

"Please, 'Vember, tell me what this is about."

Their eyes met and she nodded. Judging the time they had five minutes until Malfoy and Dolohov appeared. In a low whisper she explained to Remus what had happened, how they had nearly lost.

"And so I won't have you die for me," she finished, her voice cracking as she cried. "Not this time."

He hugged her to him and she curled up against him. "I'm glad though," he murmured. "I'm glad to know I would die for you. I would do it again."

November began to reply but her eye caught what time it was. Quickly she threw a charm at Remus. "_Petrificus Totalus_."

His cry of protest was cut off by a full body bind. November leaned over and kissed him. "I'm sorry, Remus. But now it's my turn to take the risks."

She crawled quietly to the open door and lay half out of it, awkwardly limp and allowing her hair to cover her face. A murmured charm and her heartbeat slowed and she lay still.

There was a familiar whooshing and the Death Eaters landed.

* * *

><p>Lucius surveyed the scene as Dolohov landed next to him. They had come because someone was interfering with their work, someone probably from Dubledore. And yet…<p>

"Someone beat us to it," Dolohov growled, wand out in a moment.

"So it would appear."

They began toward the house and stopped abruptly. No matter how they tried they could not progress further. November's charms held strong.

"This is too strange. The house is clearly destroyed and yet we can't get in. What do we do, Malfoy?"

Lucius nodded absently. If he ran his hand along the edge of the barrier he realized he could circle the house. He followed the invisible wall around to the front door.

A blonde woman, a striking resemblance to himself, hung out of the door and blood dripped down her arm and off her fingertips, pooling on the ground. Surely no one would voluntarily take this position. And yet it was very suspicious. Why would anyone erect charms around a house they had destroyed?

"Maybe it's to keep help out?" Dolohov mused aloud. "Strong charms."

Lucius nodded. Only two options really occurred to him: either this was an elaborate set up as some sort of self-defense, or they had been reached first by another wizard they had crossed and were now isolated from any help. It seemed deeply unlikely that anyone could know the Death Eaters were coming. The orders had only been given in the past hour. And yet there seemed to be something to that…

"It'll take hours to break down these charms and the house isn't on Floo. What do we do?"

As Lucius stood looking at the house a strong sense of destiny and déjà vu seemed to sweep over him. But he knew he had never been to this house before.

"Anyone inside?" Lucius asked Dolohov curtly.

A scanning spell showed one other figure, prone and totally still.

"I don't recognize her," Anton gestured at November, "do you?"

"No…It just seems so very familiar."

"Well, it isn't the first place we've been beaten to."

"I suppose not." Lucius finally shook his head and turned away from the house. "Come on. If they're dead then we've done our job."

"Here here," Dolohov joked with a nasty grin. The pair began to walk away from the house. "When's the next time you're seein' Helena?"

Malfoy gave his companion a dirty look and November's ears pricked.

"She returns to the city Monday. I will have her over then."

"I'm surprised with all the Dark Lord has you doing that you have the time."

Lucius could not help but smile and desire stirred in his gut. "She is a witch you make time for, I assure you."

There was a wooshing of black smoky cloud and the pair was gone.

* * *

><p>November lay totally still, the fake blood dripping down her arm, for a full half an hour after they had left. Her mind wandered as she lay there: it was Saturday and Lucius expected her back Monday. What had seemed like such a long time to be alone with Remus was now almost unendurably short.<p>

Finally, she believed that all was clear and hurried over to Remus, unbinding him.

"What did you do?"

His eyes were anxious but she could tell he was not just angry: he was terrified for her.

"If he recognized you…"

"He didn't. I could hear him."

The couple stared at one another for a short time then Remus pulled her to him. They remained that way for some time before November broke the silence.

"I have to be back Monday. He wants to see me that night."

Remus stood and walked away from her, frustrated but not wanting to take it out on her.

"We knew this would happen, Remus," November called after him.

"I know," he spoke to the wall he was facing. "It was just so nice to forget…"

"You have no idea…" November echoed.

Remus faced her feeling guilty. Of course this was much harder on her. She had to actually do all of this. But it was just so frustrating to him to have to sit on the receiving end of it. They had put off being together for so long and now that they were finally together November was even more entangled than before.

He sighed and waved his hand around the room. "_Repairo."_

The pieces and parts flew back together, the lights coming back on and the furniture becoming useable once again. November moved to the couch, her eyes never leaving Remus, allowing the debris on the floor to correct itself.

"Leave the outside until…Monday. It might deter Dolohov if he comes back."

"What about Lucius?"

"He won't. He would never come back to check. His dead stay dead." She stared at her hair before dropping the spell, the blonde leaking out of her hair and leaving the rich brown.

With a sigh that made him sound a million years old, Remus stretched out on the couch, curling November around him. "We still have a few days. And you're _mine_."

She could hear the smile in his voice and leaned up to kiss him. His hands worked through her hair and soon enough their clothes began to pile up on the floor next to the couch.

* * *

><p>November's heels clicked loudly down the cold halls of Malfoy Manor. Lucius had, of course, invited her to join him for dinner (not unusual) but the invitation was given for his home (very unusual). Remus had not reacted well to this news and their conversation played in her mind as she searched the enormous house.<p>

"_There's only one reason he would invite you to his house!" Remus had exclaimed in frustration. _

"_And what would that be?"_

"_His bed. What do you think?" _

_November's arms had crossed across her chest and her voice had taken on a dangerous edge. "I think I have managed this long and can manage still."_

"_It's not that, November!" He had crossed to her, banging a cabinet door shut in anger. "What's to stop him from taking what he wants? He's much bigger than you and would it be so hard…?" Remus had trailed off, not wanting to stress how easy rape could be or downplay how strong November could be. _

_November had taken his face in her hands. "He's too proud. What would it be to him to rape me? But to win me, that's something. To have me asking him to take me, that's what he's waiting for."_

"_But have you forgotten about–"_

"_Fenrir?" she interjected. "I couldn't even if I tried. And that's why I must go." _

It hadn't sat well and November knew there was something to what Remus was saying but it was too late to get afraid. She had no time for panic. She only had time for cold, hard Death Eater persona.

Finally, she found the long dining room, bedecked in mahogany and silver. But her stomach nearly hit the floor when she saw why Malfoy had invited her to the Manor. Two blonde heads turned for face her and one smiled. The other kept a straight, unemotional face.

"Helena! I am so very sorry I did not meet you at the door but Draco only arrived an hour ago. You will forgive me I'm sure?" He walked over to her quickly and greeted her with a kiss. Thinking fast November returned the kiss but not too amorously.

She had never thought of how to behave for his son. She was the "other woman" in many ways and Draco was as unpredictable as his father. Would Lucius prefer she treat his son with respect or distantly? If Draco bit at her would it offend Lucius if she bit back?

"Might I have a quick word, darling?" she cooed at him as pleasantly as she could manage.

"Of course. Draco, do have a seat; we'll just be a moment."

Once in the hall November decided to pull a rare move: she let down a wall and showed a peek of her real emotions.

"Lucius, you know I adore you–"

Malfoy's eyebrows went up. "I actually had been kept in the dark on this count, in case you have forgotten. I thought bringing Draco around might–"

"Well, that's just it. Are you sure this is the best idea? I am not his mother and he has no reason to like me. I'm not even old enough to be his mother."

A smile broke generously across Lucius' face. "You're nervous, aren't you? Now, Helena, the two of you should know one another. You have taken a large place in my life and Draco knows this. This must happen eventually."

In the back of her mind, November was screaming "_Why?_" but she did not ask because she did not want to know. Lucius was speaking as though there was some inevitability to them and this alarmed her more than the presence of his volatile teenage son.

"Now, I've asked the house elves to prepare paprikash, which I know you are partial to. Do relax and don't let my son intimidate you. He's a child yet and he knows his place."

* * *

><p>The meal had been cleared away and Draco was ushered through with November into a plush side room.<p>

"Do make yourselves comfortable. I'll only be a moment," Lucius prompted them before leaving the room.

The ticking of a small but very loud clock seemed to fill the room and with a wave of her hand November played out the sound of a cricket chirping. Draco laughed a little and, making eye contact with her, sat forward suddenly, looking at the door.

"Listen. We need to get something straight."

November could not resist the instinct to lean back, even from a meter away.

"My father likes you much more than he lets on."

November's eyes widened just a bit, but Draco noticed all the same.

"I mean it. So I'm warning you. You had best not be leading him on or using him or anything like that. It's not a game you'll win."

"I had never once believed it was." It was November's turn to watch Draco react. She had given him a rare dose of her true feelings and he had felt this in her tone.

The younger wizard leaned forward even more. "There's more going on here, isn't there? What–"

But November would never learn what it was he intended to ask. The door opened and the evening resumed. But before she left that evening, November caught Draco's eye and something, even she was not sure what, passed between them.


	14. Chapter 14: Naked

**Chapter 14: Naked**

_Thank you again reviewers. This hopefully makes up for the clumsiness of the last chapter! _

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><p>"Harry's seeing more and more. We must tell him that these things could be projections. There is no guarantee that Voldermort would not be able to put images into his mind."<p>

The Order had met quickly after Sirius had talked to Harry about his dreams via the fireplace. Two weeks after Sirius had walked in on them, November had walked into the kitchen as he was pulling his head out of the fire and he had begrudgingly told her about their conversation. This was a danger that was not at all new but seemed to be getting worse. As always, Sirius was frustrated with the Order/Molly's instance that Harry be kept in the dark. But November had her own objections.

"But they aren't visions. At least not yet. If he had ignored what he saw as Nagini..." She trailed off and didn't meet Arthur's eyes.

Remus squeezed November's hand. Now that they were openly together (right timing it seemed since things had only gotten darker since their return) he was more affectionate than ever.

"But it is not beyond the Dark Lord's ability to do as Black says." The familiar drawl rang out from a corner of the room. Now that school was back in session, Snape had been removed from isolation. Though he reported the seeing-eye had not been located or blocked there was nothing more to do; it would draw too much attention to pull him for any time from Hogwarts. "And if Harry continues to do as poorly at blocking entry into his mind as can only be expected from–"

"You'll not talk about him like this!" Sirius shouted at Severus, hands planted on the table and ready to jump to his feet. "He certainly doesn't need Snivelus–"

"Back off!"

All eyes turned to November and it took her a moment to realize she was the one who had yelled. Her face burned and she pulled her hand out of Remus', folding them in her lap and staring intently at them. For the second she had looked around the table she had seen only surprise at her outburst and it angered her.

Sirius stared at her, disbelieving. "Looks like you've been spending too much time with Death Eaters."

Remus' wand was out before November could register he had moved. "Enough, Sirius."

The room became very tense and Tonks reached for her pocket.

"I'm not the one out of line."

"No. You are. Harry doesn't need you causing fights every time his name is maligned. We aren't at school anymore."

Sirius met no one's eyes but sat back, silent and sullen but clearly backing down. As soon as the tension had broken November was out of the door. She heard steps behind her and before she could disappear, Remus had her by the arm.

"By no means would I agree with Sirius on this count," he murmured, locking eyes with her, "but you know how he feels and Snape is just as far out of line."

She jerked her arm away and stared at him in anger. This had been building for a long time and Remus had pushed it too far. "You talk about being united and about how if Dumbledore trusts Snape you do as well, but it's all lies. You may trust him but you don't care about him even slightly. He is our biggest asset and he risks everything and you would not shed one tear if he were killed tomorrow for it. Sirius jumps down his throat every time he puts one toe out of line, but who's keeping Sirius in check? No one, and I'm sick of it."

November started up the stairs and Remus tried to catch her again so she whirled on him, wand at his neck.

"Don't defend me out there and lecture me back here, Remus Lupin. They know you don't mean what you say."

There was a crack and she was gone.

**LINE**

Much to his frustration Remus quickly realized she was nowhere in the house. Wherever she had gone it was not here and he was not likely to find her. He lay in bed, alone for the first time in what seemed like ages, with no other options but to think.

She was right and that was what annoyed him most. She had been forced into the position of having to rationalize and understand people that Sirius and himself had hated and shut out since their youth. Severus had covered her ass several times and he was truly the only other person who could understand her position.

Remus pulled at a loose thread in the bedspread before sighing and pulling the covers up under his chin. Slowly, he fell asleep.

* * *

><p>Lucius could not sleep.<p>

His son had related his suspicions that Helena was less than honest with him before heading back to Hogwarts. The Death Eaters were becoming annoyed with the ever-growing role she had in his life; she was a distraction. Even Severus had distanced himself from her, not wishing to be tied to her.

Surely he had not been played. Surely she had not manipulated him so easily.

The more he thought about this the more frustrated he became. Come hell or high water he would have his answer tonight.

He dressed quickly. It had been far too long and she had promised far too much.

In a moment he was outside of her house. From the street he could see her silhouette in the window, sitting on the couch and staring off at the wall. He approached the apartments and with a simple spell the door swung open.

* * *

><p>November knew that in her current temper she would not be able to lie beside Remus that night. And since Sirius would probably start drinking and Sir Cadougan would try to be consoling, she had decided the best place for the evening would be the go-between-apartment. No one would look for her there and it would be perfectly safe, surrounded by Muggles.<p>

November had crawled up on the couch and wrapped a quilt around herself, zoning out completely. She understood what made Sirius and Lupin the way they were about Severus but it had been _years_ since all of that and _none_ of them had managed to let it go. The childishness combined with her inherent dependence on Snape had begun to eat away at her tolerance.

She loved Remus but she hated having to defend herself against a room and him. If he could only be on her side…

There was a creak in a floorboard and her wand was out. Someone was in her apartment. Her hair flashed to red and in the next moment Lucius Malfoy was facing her.

Lucius laughed quietly at the look of complete surprise on her face. She was not dressed up as she had been every other time he had seen her and it turned him on even more. She looked so real and attainable this way, in corduroys and a button-down.

"I wasn't expecting you," November finally managed, suppressing the shock she felt.

"I had hoped to surprise you. I was thinking of you." He closed the door just as silently and the bolt slid shut, locking the door.

"Only good things I hope?" Her heart began to pound and she felt sick. She watched as he slowly pulled his cloak off, hanging it neatly on the hook by the door. His shirt was nearly see through and his muscles rippled beneath.

"Define good, Helena." He approached her, lightly taking her wand from her hand and setting it atop the nearby knick-knack shelf.

Subconsciously, she took a step back from him. "Positive things."

He took her hair in his hand and brought it to his face. "Very positive," he murmured in her ear before kissing her neck.

"Lucius," she stepped back quickly, "this is hardly the time."

His face grew dark and dangerous and his tone became sharp. "And when would the time be? I have waited for months, Helena. You know me as well as I have ever allowed another person. You have what you asked and there must be some reciprocation. Unless of course," he grabbed her wrists in a fluid motion and drove her back against the wall, her arms pinned above her head, "you have been less than honest with me."

Blank fear engulfed her as she realized what was happening to her. She could not win. If she refused him she would suffer, but if she accepted… And Remus… She stifled a gasp as she realized how this would look. He could reasonably believe that in her anger she had screwed Malfoy.

As Malfoy watched her he could read nothing, a feeling that only increased his determination. "I would elope with you if that was what you required. Do you realize that? You could have everything if you would only let me in."

His hard body pressed against hers, grinding his hips and his erection against her. The anticipation already had him hard. She felt his lips crash against hers and she did not resist. It became immediately clear how he intended to have her as he took her wrists in one hand, pinning them above her head and began to crush and grind her breasts with the other hand. Tears formed in her closed eyes and rolled down her cheeks.

Lucius knew he was capable of being much more romantic than this but he was far too eager. He had slept with no one since Narcissa had left and Helena had given him more than enough fuel for personal satisfaction. But it wasn't the same. It wasn't the same as breathing in her perfume, feeling her breasts in his hands, feeling her soft skin against his… Malfoy pulled back to look at her and November quickly hid her tears. He let her hands go and they hung at her sides like dead weights.

"Undress me." Malfoy's words were a command and he stepped from her to the center of the room, his back to the fireplace.

November walked to him and pulled his shirt over his head, her hands running up his torso and tossing it to the side. Kneeling in front of him, she pulled his trousers off, slipping them down his hips. Malfoy stopped her before she could begin on his underwear, pulling her back to her feet.

"My turn." His voice was husky with wanting and he fiercely began to rip open the button-down she wore, the buttons rattling into corners of the room. Lucius's teeth sank into her bare shoulder and she cried out in pain despite herself. His lips covered her breasts as he snapped her bra open easily, throwing it aside. Roughly, he yanked her trousers to the floor, kissing the inside of her hips.

Despite everything, despite knowing she should not, November began to cry.

* * *

><p>Sirius had been fully prepared for an evening of moping and drinking. The only thing stopping him was guilt. He was too hard on her and it gnawed at him. He was beyond sick of being useless and now that Remus and November had one another…<p>

Remus had said she wasn't in the house and had gone to bed. But Sirius knew where she was. Or at least he knew where he would be if he were her.

The longer he sat, picking at the scrubbed wooden table, the more he felt he owed her an apology. He had harassed her long enough and she and Remus were two of the few people who truly cared about him.

A handful of Floo Powder and a burst of green flame later and he stepped out of the fireplace in the go-between-apartment. What he saw sent a burst of flaming rage through him. November was nearly naked and Lucius Malfoy knelt before her, similarly undressed and kissing her stomach. The assumption that she was cheating on Remus with this monster made him want to snap her neck.

But as she looked up he knew this was not what it seemed. Her face was puffy and wet from crying and her wrists were bruised. There was a bite mark on her shoulder that was purpling as well. Whatever this was, it was not willing.

Lucius was now aware that there was a third person in the room and began to turn toward Sirius.

"_Stupefiy_!" It was the only spell Sirius could think of that would not also hurt November. As it were the force of Lucius flying into the wall took her with it. Both lay in a heap, unmoving, and Sirius rushed over, pulling November from under Malfoy's unconscious body.

November's first thought was for cover. She curled up, shielding her nakedness from Sirius until he draped the quilt around her. He was yelling but her ears only made a roaring sound. She watched, unmoving, as he kicked Lucius in the ribs and head repeatedly. But something went off in her head and she begged him to stop.

"STOP?" Sirius shouted, gesturing wildly. "He would have raped you!"

November had been able to hold things together until the mention of that word. Wailing sobs broke from her and Sirius's guilt increased. He pulled her to him, soothing her and magically gathering up her clothes. They had to get out of there before Malfoy came to again.

"There has to be signs of struggle," she panted between sobs. "He'll think it was a trap."

Sirius marveled at how she could even think right now but nodded. Releasing his fury he stormed through the apartment, destroying anything he could lay hand to. Banging started up on the front door and Sirius made the mental leap that the neighbors had as well: there were loud crashing sounds and a woman crying, what else could be assumed? A gash in his palm left blood smears across the wall and doors and the person at the door went away.

Outside, the sounds of Muggle police sirens screamed through the silence. The pair traded looks and Sirius threw Lucius's clothes into the fire, leaving his cloak half outside of the fire where the flames began to lick at the carpet.

"We'll leave him then," Sirius grumbled, more to himself, as the police cars stopped outside the building. "Can't have them find a body with my blood on it. But we've got to get you out of here. Hold these." Sirius dumped her clothes and wand in her lap and picked her up clumsily. There was a crack and they were gone.

* * *

><p>Remus woke with no external stimuli, but with a feeling that something terrible had happened. Moments later his door opened, showing a wide-eyes Sirius. A glance at his bed and back at his friend's face told him all he needed to know.<p>

November had been left with Kretcher and the house elf had to dive out of the way as Remus exploded into the room. Her weeping grew as she saw him and she tried to hide in the blanket. But it was too late; Remus had seen the bite mark and seen enough to guess at just how much she was not wearing.

"HOW DID THIS HAPPEN?" he roared at Sirius. Remus did not even know what to think. November had reappeared sobbing, naked, and hurt with only Sirius for company.

November stared; Remus rarely yelled and this was nearly an explosion. Quickly, Sirius explained what he guessed had happened, which was surprisingly accurate.

"Is this true?" Remus whispered, looking at her with an expression she had never seen before.

November nodded, her sobbing finally calming down. "I swear on the family of Cadougan I don't know why Lucius came."

Remus had November in his arms within moments. It felt like hours before anyone spoke again, Remus holding November and Sirius collapsed on the floor by the wall.

Mercifully, November fell asleep and Remus was able to dress her and get her into their bed. For a short moment after she was in bed, Remus stepped out of the room and to talk to Sirius.

"What brought you there?"

"I was going to apologize for being an asshole. I still haven't."

A ghost of a smile flicked over Remus' mouth. "Oh, I think you have. You saved her, Sirius. Thank you."

There weren't words for how he felt so Sirius only nodded. He walked away, deciding to go to bed for the first time in ages.

* * *

><p>Lucius woke to the sounds of people yelling and wood splintering. It was scalding hot and he was in only his underwear.<p>

He pushed himself up and saw his lovely blonde hair dripping blood. As he sat up he realized the blood was from his mouth, nose, and ear. It hurt to breathe.

For the first time he became aware of the fire in the room. The paint was actually curling with the heat and his clothes were nowhere in sight.

The voices were louder and the door gave way. He had to get out of here. He could not, would not, be taken by Muggles.

He Apparated to his room in his home. After shouting for his house elves, he found time to question how this had happened. Someone had entered through the Floo network. He hadn't seen who, but he had heard the voice.

Helena was missing and her place was now a smoking wreck.

Lucius collapsed onto his bed, his house elves tending to his wounds.

Things he had been noticing ever since he met her began piecing themselves together as he allowed himself to fade into blackness.


	15. Chapter 15: Titus' Last Gift

**Chapter 15: Titus' Last Gift**

November woke late the next day, well after the lower half of the house had filled with concerned Order members.

"Hello, beautiful," Remus murmured as her eyes focused on him.

She gave him a small smile at the greeting. "Hello." She stretched, her shoulder aching, and it reminded her quickly of all that had happened. "How long have I slept?"

"It's nearly three in the afternoon."

"Merlin…That long?"

He nodded and she pushed herself into a sitting position. November was surprised to look up and see tears in his eyes.

"I'm so glad you're …"

November grabbed him in a tight hug and fought back her own tears. She had cried enough and she would have to move on quickly. She knew with dead certainty that to Lucius, he and Helena were not through.

"Why was Sirius even there?" November asked, sitting back. To her that had been as weird as Lucius popping by.

"He wanted to apologize for being an asshole. Those are his words, by the way."

"What a well-timed conscience he has," she replied, tracing patterns in the back of Remus's hands.

Silence settled on the couple. Remus had received the gory details from Sirius and he knew better than to ever ask what had happened before Sirius arrived. But something was eating at him and the full moon was too close to just let it go. When November looked back up, she could read what he was about to ask on his face. "Please don't, Remus."

"I have to know, November." His fists balled up and his eyes took on a glare that only she inspired in him. "I _would_ have killed him, even without the moon being close. _Sirius_ would have killed him. _You _would have killed him not so long ago. Why did you stop us?"

She gave him a loud and frustrated sigh.

"I would tear his throat out with my _teeth_ to protect you and suddenly we are to be noble about Lucius Malfoy?"

"If it means not MURDERING HIM, yes, we will! And don't you dare start thinking I'm falling for him!" She yanked down her shirt to show the bruise on her shoulder. Remus winced and kept his mouth shut as hard as it was; of course he worried about that. But now she had evidence in the favor of her words. "And what for? To end up in Azkaban? You cannot just kill Lucius Malfoy and walk away!"

Remus looked defeated, but had one last argument. "The last time I heard this, the man who could prove Sirius' innocence escaped, never to be brought to justice."

"You don't know that. Who knows what will come of either of them."

Remus sighed, his fists clenching and unclenching, and November made room in their bed for him. He curled up beside her, wrapping his arms around her with her head dropping onto his chest. He felt bad that she was comforting him, but she had strength he lacked when it came to all of this.

Remus looked down at November. "Will you be…?"

November stared out into space and he did not press her. It just seemed so surreal every time she thought about it. It was hard to believe, for many reasons.

At that moment the door burst open, revealing Severus Snape with Sirius Black close on his heels.

"Today is really not the day to – " Sirius was shouting.

"Piss off," Snape spat back. "She needs to hear this and I need to leave."

Remus was positively bristling, but November's arms kept steady pressure on him, holding him close to her.

"Lucius, obviously, is laid up for the time being." Snape shot a significant glance at Sirius.

"I'd beat his head in with a club given the chance, what of it?" Sirius retorted.

"I am about to go to him and renounce any connection we have with one another." Shouts of anger greeted this statement from the two men, but Snape ignored them and addressed only November. "I am sure you understand the need for this." There was a pause and slowly he took her hand in his own. "I surely do not lament his current state."

Her hand dropped back onto the comforter and Snape was out of the room as quickly as he had come. Sirius let him go, shouting abuses at him until he was out of sight.

November simply stared at her hand. She had made physical contact with Snape twice before in her life, but this was different; this was his explanation.

"Can you believe that GIT?" raged Remus, sitting up beside her on the bed.

"Yes."

November rolled her eyes, tired of being stared at like that. "You two really notice _nothing,_ don't you? He's _scared_."

Remus actually jerked his head a bit and Sirius shook his head wildly.

"He's Snape. He doesn't get scared."

"No. He doesn't _show_ he's scared. Not the same. If Lucius decides this is his fault for hooking us up, or if the Death Eaters get wind of anything suspicious, there would be no hesitation in eliminating him completely." She looked at them both significantly. "It's the only sane thing for him to do."

"And you assume all this because…?"

"His hand." They looked at her not following. "It was shaking so hard he could barely grasp mine. He wanted me to know…"

Silence reigned in the room and finally Remus cleared his throat. "It would appear that… we have misjudged him."

"And hardly for the first time."

* * *

><p>Molly had finally succeeded in pushing the men out and had drawn a bath for November with healing herbs and salves in it. By the time November reappeared, her bruising was down and she seemed lighter, if ever so slightly.<p>

Remus would not leave her and, combined with the full moon three days away, looked like he would bite the first person who tried to separate them.

The meeting went by without participation from November. She needed to be there if they were going to discuss her future but no one would have asked her to relive the events. Snape's announcement raised the ire in everyone except for Lupin, Sirius, and Dumbledore. None of them gave an explanation but all maintained there was a good reason. The shock of hearing Sirius excuse Severus put a stop to most of the insults.

It was decided that the whole thing with Lucius needed to be broken off as soon as possible, not to any great surprise. November knew better but stayed silent; she could not just break up with him and walk away unscathed. But she was ready to walk away, even if it meant she had to do it scathed.

As everyone was leaving, November had retreated into the greenhouse. She knew she should write Lucius and create some reason for them to stop seeing one another, but she just couldn't deal with it today. She threw a charm around the house to block Lucius's owl. She would decide when and if he ever spoke to her again.

The sound of wings drew her attention and a gorgeous Scops owl landed in front of her. Not Lucius's owl (a moonfaced Spectacled owl). It shrieked at her insistently and she took the letter it carried, afraid to draw more attention.

Opening it carefully she read: _I see you have discovered the more 'charming' side of my ex-husband. Leave now. – Narcissa Black_

Sirius popped his head around the corner in time to see the owl take flight and November crumpled up the letter, hiding it behind her.

"I don't suppose you would tell me what that was if I asked?"

"Your cousin is signing her maiden name now."

It took him a minute but he caught on quickly. "Oh. A warning?"

"A little late in coming but I suppose she doesn't mind that. Don't tell Remus, please."

"November, I can't –"

"I'm not asking you to lie but you know he will never ask if he doesn't know. It's three days off of the full moon and I don't think he can handle much more."

Sirius was clearly torn but she was right. Remus's jealousy always flared about now and this had made it a thousand times worse. "Fine," he agreed reluctantly. "I'll get out of here before he notices."

With a wave of her wand, November watched the letter crumble into dust.

* * *

><p>It was the night after the full moon and November was glad that she could go back to her usual role. She had told dangerous lies and had been burned but she had to move on or she would scream.<p>

This moon had been worse than usual. She was not sure if it was all of the anger Remus had undoubtedly stuffed away or something else entirely, but he had woken in terrible physical condition.

November brushed his hair out of his face and Remus looked up from his book, smiling at her. His back had serious lacerations and he had been camped out on his stomach the entire day, waiting for them to heal up a bit. November never wanted to intervene until the body had taken at least some of the natural course; as with anything too much magic could backfire.

"How's it?"

"Itchy." He rested his head on the pillow he had propped up under himself to read and shut his book absently.

"But that's good. Here…" November pulled back the cotton she had criss-crossed his back with and he hissed in air through his teeth. "Sorry…" she worked at dabbing salve onto her fingertips and rubbing it through the gashes on his back. She had no idea how he had gashes in his own back but she didn't ask; he had never asked about 'the night' and she did not ask about the full moon.

"I'll just put my hand here for a sec…" she murmured, propping her hand next to his face and leaning over to reach the other side of his back.

Remus rested his head against her hand. Then everything went black.

Panic seized him as Remus realized he could hear and not see. He could not move either. He began to yell for November to help him when he realized he was not hearing November's voice. The voice he heard was that of the Dark Lord.

He stifled his yell and lay still, as if there were any alternative. Someone began to appear in his field of vision. Long, blonde hair…Lucius Malfoy. Sickening rage swarmed through Remus but he still could not move.

"What do you mean you do not know what happened?" Voldermort's voice was tense and angry.

"My Lord, my communications have been blocked. I have not heard from nor seen her since that night."

"Curse your stupidity, Malfoy!" There was a flash of light and Malfoy collapsed to the ground, shaking. His face was still lightly bruised and he touched his ribs as he stood again. "You have lost a woman who knows far too much and all because you wanted sex!"

"My Lord, I have looked over my memories of that night and I have –"

"Silence!"

The Dark Lord appeared in Remus's line of vision and turned towards him. "We are being watched!" His face slowly swiveled until he was looking directly at Remus Lupin.

In panic, Remus closed his eyes.

"Sirius! Sirius, help!" The first sounds that reached his ears on waking were November screaming her head off. Then Sirius pounding up the stairs and he felt his friend roll him onto his back. He wanted to tell them he was fine but he felt temporarily stunned.

"He's breathing, 'Vember. What happened?"

"I only was fixing up his back and then he went rigid and he wouldn't answer me. I tried to do something but my arm…then he just collapsed in on himself and I could move again."

"What's on your arm?"

"Nothing! Only my ring!"

Remus found he could move again and began to cough loudly, realizing he had been holding his breath for far too long. November could only squeeze his hand tightly as Sirius tried to pound him on uninjured parts of his back.

"I thought I killed you," November whispered.

"Not yet," he replied hoarsely. "It's your ring, November! It's what they've been looking for: the seeing eye."

November blanched. "Remus…"

"Use Legilimency. Look at my memory! I promise you that's what it is!"

"Remus, I couldn't…"

"I could," barked Sirius, grabbing her hand. There was a blast of white light and his memory unraveled for them. When it had finished they both stood there, stunned. November pulled at her hand quickly, trying to get the ring off. She yanked it free and dropped it on a side table, staring at it.

"All this time…" murmured Sirius.

"Titus gave it to you, did he not?" Remus asked her. She nodded, still looking at the ring. "And shortly after he was killed?"

Again she nodded. "And we knew the Death Eaters were looking for a ring but…I never thought…"

"That you'd been wearing it for years…" Sirius finished. "I'll be damned. Didn't you test it?"

"Of course I did! Way back when I moved here! But nothing came up."

"We need to get Dumbledore."

November sighed and sat heavily on the floor.

"What's wrong?" Remus was by her side quickly and she gave him a pathetic smile.

"All I do is call emergency meetings. This will stop someday, right?"

Remus fought the urge to violently verbally abuse Lucius and nodded, kissing her on the forehead.

"You two stay. I'll call up the 'vitals'," Sirius said with a small smile. "Merlin knows you could both use a break."

* * *

><p>The ring sat in front of Dumbledore, quietly shinning in the firelight.<p>

"So it has been here, with us, all this time. And you only had to hold it to your eye," he mused, picking it up and twirling it lightly. His blue eyes locked with November's brown ones. "Will you mind? This is an object of sentiment for you."

November shook her head, tearing up a little. "No. It's just good to have closure. Now we know why…why he was killed. Why I was killed."

"I am not sure how much use this will be to us now that the Dark Lord has felt its presence, but as long as his defenses are down this could prove vital to us." Albus rose and Moody, Arthur, and Kingsly followed suit. "It will have to be dismantled and Alastor will find a safe place for it within Hogwarts. There are places Miss Umbridge is still very much in ignorance about within that castle." A faint smile flickered across his lips.

With a polite farewell, Kingsly and Albus disappeared one at a time through the fireplace. The ring went with them.

The familiar clomping reached her and she turned to see Mad-Eye smiling at her. "Good job, girl." Then he too was gone.

November and Arthur looked at each other a moment before Arthur wrapped her up in a hug.

"He would be so proud. So very proud." When they stepped back, November could not help but smile.

Arthur left, the last one to go, and November leaned heavily against a counter. It was over; a section of her life that had brought her to the Black Home and that had long been a mystery was now finished.

Remus appeared in the door, looking tired but better. November had taught Sirius her stitches spell months ago and Sirius had spent the meeting stitching up Remus's back. The werewolf was nearly floored, literally and figuratively, when November flung herself into his arms.

"November…?"

"It's done. We can move forward, Remus. Maybe something good is finally going to happen to us!"

He held her tightly, absently running his fingers through her hair. "I certainly hope so."

* * *

><p><em>So I know that Dumbledore would be out of Hogwarts (assuming you've been following where we are in the OOoP timeline) and I tried to do something with that, but it was just as weird as the chapter before last and I trashed it.<em>

_So, no he's not at Hogwarts but I figure they surely knew how to contact him during that time. _

_Thanks for the reviews all! _


	16. Chapter 16: Sirius

**Chapter 16: Sirius**

"You can't do that," November laughed as Sirius attempted to take her rook.

"Of course I can. I'm Sirius Black!" he half purred at her.

"Oh save it for someone who's interested!" November laughed. Sirius had treated her very differently since the night he had stopped Lucius. He had always been critical and gruff regarding her "job" but since then he had treated her warmly and sought her out more frequently. It wasn't romance as much as change of heart. So tonight they found themselves in the dining room playing chess and he had resorted to cheating because, even though she was the worse player of the two, November was somehow winning.

The fire roared to life in the kitchen next to them and they were both on their feet in seconds. Paranoia was constant between the three of them now, but November recognized the footsteps before they entered the room.

"Snape? You should be at –"

But Snape motioned for her to be silent and drew up inches from Sirius, staring intently at him. "Is this Sirius Black?"

"Yes." November couldn't understand why he cared or what was going on. "We've been playing chess for the better part of an hour. What's wrong?"

"Your godson," Snape addressed Sirius quickly, "believes that you are being tortured in the Department of Mysteries by the Dark Lord as we speak."

"No…" Sirius sat down heavily, sounding as if the air were rushing out of him, and stared at Severus. All his worries were confirmed in that sentence. "Has he…?"

"Done anything stupid? Yes. I can only assume that they will be well on their way to the Ministry to save you as soon as they are free of Umbridge, which should not be hard."

November and Sirius gaped. "We must call the Order," November finally managed. The whole thing was so huge and so immediate it seemed hard to act. "Find my hus–" she stopped and blushed deeply. "Find Remus, Sirius. I'll go for Tonks and Alastor as soon as I've changed. Snape, you _must_ find Dumbledore."

The tall, dark wizard simply nodded before disappearing back through the fire. November began to take the stairs a few at a time when someone grabbed her arm. Sirius Black held her elbow and was giving her an odd look.

"Your husband? That's what you were going to say?"

"I misspoke."

"He should be, though. I've been telling Moony that for weeks. With the war… you haven't got time to spare."

She was frozen by the unexpected candor; Sirius had never been as serious with her as he was with Remus.

"I can't make him want that, no matter what I want," she half whispered. The fog in her brain cleared somewhat and she dashed back up the stairs, disappearing from sight.

* * *

><p>Remus appeared shortly after her hair had turned white blonde.<p>

"You cannot go! I won't allow it!"

She disappeared from sight and he could hear her three floors below walking toward the kitchen fireplace. She was nearly there when he appeared, blocking her way. He caught her up in his arms and she could tell plainly he was not angry; he was afraid for her.

"I'm Order too, Remus!"

"But Lucius will almost certainly be there!"

November hugged him close to her, painfully aware that the longer this went on the more time they lost. "And I'll risk it all to fight by your side. I am going with you because I love you and because it is _right_."

Remus stared at her for a moment and then crushed his moth against hers; she would have melted had there not been immediate danger. "I'll go for Kingsly." He pushed her away from him as if forcing himself to let her go and he disappeared through green flame.

* * *

><p>Tonks, November, and Alastor appeared in the circular entrance to the Department of Mysteries to the sound of shouts and screams. But it was not at all clear where they were coming from. Moody marked the door they had come from as soon as they shut it and the doors spun about them, pulling to a stop with one carrying a glowing X.<p>

"Where do we start?" Tonks sounded as overwhelmed as November felt but Moody was quick on his feet.

"Each start with a corridor to the left of the marked door. Listen and then move on to the next door."

Within minutes they had narrowed down two doors. One door led to a glowing room and the next, down to an amphitheater.

"Harry!" Tonks immediately recognized the boy's voice and started down toward the amphitheater. But November heard another voice through the glowing room that also stood out to her.

"Ron's down there, Alastor!"

His magical eye seemed to bore through the walls and he nodded quickly, stepping into the same passage as Tonks. "Go to them and find us! Constant vigilance!"

* * *

><p>When Remus entered the round room with doors, he was just in time to see November's blonde hair and Alastor's coat disappear through two separate corridors and with no time to call out. Kingsly dashed forward, grabbing the door Alastor had gone through before it could shut. But November's door had already closed, now indistinguishable from the others.<p>

Kingsly could clearly see the warring sides within Remus and he indicated the door he held. "She'll be safe."

With a nod and a sick feeling, Remus followed him through the door.

* * *

><p>November had managed to stop the brain from squeezing the life out of Ron using <em>Duro<em> but it was only a minor improvement as he was now bound up in it. She quickly decided that it may be for the best to leave him that way; he was not at all himself and couldn't be let free to wander around.

Praising Remus for reminding her of the Ferula spell only days ago, she was able to heal and bind up Ginny's black and swollen ankle.

"_Emendo_!"

The cracking sound it made when it mended gave a clue as to how painful it was but Ginny did not scream. Less gracefully than she could have hoped, November collected Luna and Hermione and set them next to Ginny.

"Can you watch them, Ginerva?" She used the girl's full name, hoping to make her sound older than fourteen.

Ginny nodded weakly, eyeing Ron who seemed to have gone into hibernation since the brain was no longer fighting him.

"You're out of danger now. Which way did Harry go when he left?"

Ginny pointed and November was gone. It felt terrible leaving children alone like this, but they weren't in danger as long as the Death Eaters still had hope of gaining the prophecy.

When November entered the fray the first thing she looked for was Harry. She watched as Neville gouged Macnair in the eye and Harry slipped on Mad-Eye's eye. Her heart caught in her throat as she saw the man lying on his back and bleeding from the head. Shielding herself she rocketed down to him, protecting him as well. Her stitching spell closed the wound and stopped the bleeding but he still looked horribly pale.

A curse grazed her hair, singeing the ends. November spun around to see Malfoy fighting Remus and her heart stopped.

* * *

><p>When Alastor and Tonks had entered, Tonk's stunning spell had knocked Lucius across three steps, and a moment later a barrage of spells had rained down on him; it had been all he could do to shield himself. Looking up at his attacker, the half-breed werewolf had been throwing any and every spell at him with eyes that burned and promised hell.<p>

What had surprised Lucius most was the man's fist connecting with his face as Lucius regained his feet. But Remus had been forced to move very close for a physical hit like that and with a shout of "_Obscuro!_", Remus was blindfolded and very close indeed.

A kick in the knee yielded a crack and a roar of pain; if he wanted a Muggle fight he would get one. Remus collapsed and sent Lucius flying with _Levi Corpus._ Blonde hair caught the Death Eater's attention as he stood again. He blasted a spell off at the woman and she spun, facing him. For Lucius, time froze and all his suspicions were confirmed. He knew that look.

Lucius watched her eyes settle on the werewolf and his blood boiled. Rocketing off, he connected with his adversary. Remus was fighting to stand, and as Lucius pointed his wand at the other's throat and he could not resist a smile.

"_Impedimentia!_" November uttered the curse as a scream and Lucius Malfoy went flying, spinning like a top into the top tiers of the room. She scrambled to Remus and healed his knee with a loud crack that was almost as bad as the first. He let out another roar of pain and then stood quickly. His knee was bruised but he could walk again.

"What would you do if I wasn't here?" November murmured with a small smile before a hex forced them apart.

November ducked out from behind a chunk of loosened stone in time to see Tonks fall from the top tier and began to battle her way to the young witch. Halfway there, November again felt Lucius's magnetic pull and when she looked back, a hex blasting out of her wand at Macnair, she saw Harry blow Lucius off of his back and into the dais. Lucius glanced at her and trained is wand on Harry.

"Remus!" she screamed and the wizard dove between the two. He shouted for Harry to leave before facing off with the Death Eater.

"Your lover is quite the healer," Malfoy growled to Remus, circling and waiting for an opening. "How unfortunate." The dark wizard watched the half-breed's eyes almost explode with hate and inwardly he grinned. With flash of green from Lucius's wand, the duel was on.

A smashing sound drew Lucius's attention and he paled; Longbottom had dropped the prophecy. A blast of purple opened up a gash across Lucius's chest, cutting even through his robes and his cold grey eyes widened. While he had overplayed his hand at first, the werewolf was an excellent duelist and was going for the kill.

"DUMBLEDORE!"

November looked up quickly from Tonks, who was reviving, and saw the tall, aged man proceeding down the steps.

Lucius stared and then deliberately locked eyes with Remus. Firing off a barrage of curses, he disappeared through a corridor. Remus began to give chase, too full of hate to let him go.

Sirius and Bellatrix were still fighting. All the others had fled or fallen and yet Sirius was mocking his deranged, and now trapped, cousin. Like throwing rocks at a cornered and rabid dog.

November's mouth opened to shout, to tell him to stop it and get out of the way.

There was a flash of red.

Sirius seemed to hang in the air before falling, terribly slowly, through the curtain. And from her vantage point November could see he did not come out the other side.

Sirius was gone.

Remus had stopped pursing Malfoy as soon as Harry's shout rang out. He watched as his last remaining childhood friend fell through the veil. His disbelieving eyes locked with November and then settled on Harry, who was making a go for the veil. He caught the boy in his arms and November could hear him tell Harry it was too late.

Too late.

* * *

><p>The door to the Black home swung open slowly and November refused to look anywhere but ahead as she entered.<p>

It had been two days since she and Remus had returned. Two days since Sirius had died.

As soon as Fudge had made an appearance, November had made herself scarce. Death Eaters were not the only ones who believed her to be dead.

She and Remus had tried to collect as many children as possible, though Ron had taken off as soon as he was unbound. They had hidden in Hogwarts, dragging them to Madame Pomfrey with her agreement to hide Remus and November until they could leave again.

Night had found the couple with a room in Hogsmeade and several owls asking if they were safe.

Remus had said very little since that night and November had succumbed to a mini-coma, sleeping for hours on end and waking only to eat. She did not want to wake up, for when she was awake her friend was dead and her lover was a shell.

But they had to come back. They could only hide for so long.

Remus headed straight for the library and did not speak but November began to wander the house. As she passed the dining room something stopped her in her steps.

The chessboard sat quietly and unassumingly on the table, waiting for the next move that would never come.

With a wordless scream, November blew the chess set into powder.

* * *

><p>"We should have a wake. We should have it here, Remus."<p>

Another day had gone by and November was restless. She could not work through the grief by just sitting. She was attempting to put Sirius's things in order, for whatever purpose the house would next serve. Buckbeak had been set free; she couldn't bear to think of him stuck here without someone regularly in the house.

Remus looked up from the Prophet. The Ministry had changed it's tune fast enough to give whiplash and so had the Prophet. The latest headline was Umbridge's removal from Hogwarts. The vultures had begun to circle over Lucius Malfoy as well; several Ministry officials swore they had seen him there. With hollow eyes, Remus picked the paper back up.

"I think he would have liked a wake. Liked people to remember him."

The paper crinkled as he balled up his fists, still not talking to her.

November was shaking without realizing it.

"YOU CANNOT AVOID THIS, REMUS!" she screamed, little lights popping in front of her vision from the volume. "SIRIUS IS DEAD!"

As soon as she said it she knew it was a mistake but it was too late. Remus was on his feet, wand out and pointing at her.

"YOU THINK I DON'T KNOW THAT, WITCH?" he roared back and a white light exploded in her direction. She ducked and the books behind her exploded. Another spell sent the chair in front of her across the room.

November's own wand was out now and her temper was high. She blocked another spell and fired back at him. "One would never know you cold, unfeeling, animal!"

Remus lunged at her and she tore out of the room. A spell hit her in the back and she fell down the rest of the stairs. Rolling over she sent him hard into the banister and took off toward the dining room. Remus bolted after her, throwing any non-lethal curse he could think of at her. He wanted to scream and tear and rend. When he turned the corner into the dining room, the doorframe next to his ear exploded, splintering and forcing him to duck.

The two worked their way around the room, both on opposite sides of the table. The dining room was coming to pieces around them as glass, wood, and metal flew, exploded, and shattered. November resorted to flying plates at his head while Remus blew each one up in midair. He knew there would be a stalemate at this rate and he had had enough.

Silent as a shadow, Remus disappeared. November's arms fell to her sides and breathing heavily she turned to walk out of the ruined room. Instead she walked right into Remus.

In a swift motion he held one of her shoulders against the wall and his wand pointed dangerously at her neck. He was breathing heavily and his eyes were wild.

"Go on!" November shouted hoarsely, starting to cry. "Kill me!" She yanked his wand so it's tip bore into her neck.

Remus's breathing became even more labored and November was shocked to see him collapse onto the floor. His hands clenched and unclenched, working through the dirt and debris. Racking sobs began to tear from him, expressing some emotion for the first time since Sirius's death.

November was by his side in an instant, holding his head to her shoulder. Tossing his wand aside, he clung to her, sobbing out all of the pain and loss he had stuffed away.

* * *

><p><em>I tried to follow the book account of the battle as closely as possible so it is different than the movie version.<em>

_And for all those hoping for some resolution with Lucius…it's on the horizon! _


	17. Chapter 17: Helena's Death

**Chapter 17: Helena's Death**

It was the evening of the wake.

Objectively, things had gone as well as could be expected. Anyone and everyone who could possibly be interested crowded into the Black home, including Harry, Ron, Hermione, and Dumbledore. Memories were shared and, in exactly the way he would wish to be remembered, most of them ended with roaring laughter and several with teary eyes.

A warmth spread through the house, and November pulled close to Remus. He held her just as tightly, arms wrapped around her and face buried in her hair, his mind wandering. Sirius had been adamant that they should marry in the weeks before he died. He had insisted that anything could happen at any time and after that night with Lucius…

Remus shifted his weight and shoved his hand deep into his trouser pocket. The small box in his pocket felt light and cool. Sirius had been right. Now all Remus needed was the right moment.

November pushed away from him as Tonks ended another hilarious story of her cousin's antics and began to search in a cupboard. She stopped, looking puzzle,d before digging through the next one. "Remus," she called over the chatter of voices. "Do we have any more candles?"

He began digging around next to her and soon they realized they were completely out. How that was even possible in a house like this was beyond either of them, but no candles were to be seen or summoned.

November ducked into the entry, pulling him with her. "I'll just have to duck out and get some. Don't draw any attention to me being gone. I don't want to spoil things." She pulled her hair up quickly, knowing that in the dark it changed the look of her face entirely.

"Are you sure? I could go."

She shook her head, pulling on a jacket and flats. "No. You need to be here. He was your best friend."

Remus couldn't really argue with that but something still bothered him. "But November, is it safe? For you to be alone? I could get someone to go with you."

She smiled and gave him a deep kiss. "It's only for candles, Remus. I'll even go to a Muggle store." She showed him some British pounds that she pulled out of her pocket.

He nodded and kissed her again. He would ask her soon, maybe later that night.

The door closed behind her quietly and Remus rejoined the group.

* * *

><p>November was halfway through the park across from the house, light playing off of her now red hair, when a figure in shadow stepped in front of her. Her wand shot out as she jumped back.<p>

"_Lumos_!"

The bluish light fell on the sharp features of Severus Snape. "Oh!" she dropped her wand level and smiled up at him. "I didn't think you would come."

"I had hoped to avoid this," he drawled.

"Wha–" November was cut off as someone behind her spun her and lifted her off of her feet by her neck. She could not scream as she stared into the cold eyes of Fenrir Greyback.

"You know what he said, Fenrir," Snape barked angrily. "Put her down."

"Silence her." Greyback's eyes carved her up like meat as they roved over her figure.

Snape acquiesced and November fell to the ground, coughing silently. The men acted quickly, each grabbing her shoulders and the three of them disappeared.

When November regained her breath she saw she was standing in the entrance of Malfoy Manor. She spun on Snape, heart racing. Her mouth moved without any sound, which suited her just fine: "What have you done, Severus?"

"Only my duty," he replied before lifting the silencing spell from her.

"And a fine job he has done indeed," Lucius's voice rang out from behind her. "Though her delicate neck is rather injured." He leaned over and traced his lips over her bruising throat. "Fenrir, did I not tell you to play nice?"

The werewolf snorted before leaving the room with a grin that spread through her veins like ice. Without a word, Snape, her last hope, followed him out. Mentally she screamed for him to stay but to no avail at all.

Lucius seemed to have done everything he could think of to make himself pleasing to her. His hair was pulled back and his jacket had been abandoned for his shirt, tie, and vest. He smelled wonderful, like deep ocean waters. November could not help but feel her weakness, in only jeans and a jacket.

"I was beginning to worry you weren't real, Helena," he crooned at her before pulling her into a kiss, savoring it now that they were alone. He showed nothing that led her to believe he had intended the double meaning, but alarms began to go off in her head. Lucius offered her his arm and led her to a smaller dining room, though no less grand than the formal one she had met Draco in.

"I thought this would be more intimate," he explained, pulling out her chair and indicating the drinks he had already set out for them. He had even remembered her very favorite cocktail.

November was dying of thirst and he seemed determined to keep her with him. If she played along, she might find a way to get out of here. She would never have been found had it not been for Snape. She drank, trying to assume a confident posture_._

Lucius leaned back, looking her up and down. "I would like to have an explanation for the events of our last meeting." His voice took on a different tone and he drank deeply from the glass in front of him. "That is why you have been brought here. I was greatly alarmed."

"My disappearance guaranteed my safety."

"No doubt," he intoned, but those were his only words. He stared, waiting.

After a silence, November opened her mouth to speak but he cut her off before a syllable was uttered.

"I have never once seen you with your hair down, Helena. No doubt it is a pleasing sight."

"I rather doubt you would be impressed," November cooed, leaning forward. But she felt sluggish and he did not even glance at her breasts.

"Let down your hair."

"I would rather not be commanded by you, Lucius Malfoy. This is the second time you have done so and it will be the last." November's true character leapt out involuntarily and a smile played on his lips as she spoke.

"I see. Very well then. Helena, would you let down your hair?" He leaned forward, eyes glinting. "Or should I ask November Cadougan?"

There was a moment where November could not even react. He knew everything and she was trapped.

November leapt to her feet and raced for the door, hoping to put space between them. But within steps she knew she was doomed. Her legs gave up and she fell heavily, not even having the strength to break her fall. There was a sound of smashing china as she grabbed at the tablecloth. She worked feebly at a her pocket, trying to get out her wand, before her arms fell awkwardly to the floor as well. She lay on the cold floor, all of her muscles acting as if they had fallen asleep. Lucius's shoes appeared in her line of vision and she did not even have the ability to lift her head.

"A rather complex potion but well worth the time. Completed with a thirst powder and a kiss… I would have expected better from the witch who has destroyed me."

November closed her eyes, trying not to hear how obvious the trap was and how stupid she was. Roughly, he foisted her into a chair. She watched as a glass of clear liquid, which had sat on the sideboard, was thrown in her face. The red ran out of her hair like blood from an opened vein, leaving it dark brown. She could not have been more naked, more exposed, had she been without a stitch of clothing.

"I may have lost the prophecy, but I'll not lose you," Lucius growled at her. "Not again."

She could not move or respond and Lucius began to pace in front of her.

"I have promised the Dark Lord that I would repair that which I have broken. But first, I am sure you are _dying_ to know how you were found out, what it was that gave you away."

November's eyes widened despite herself. It hadn't been Severus then; that would take no explanation at all.

"Let us return to my visit to you, shall we?" He leaned in and kissed her roughly, earning a whimper of fear from the immobile November. Emotionless grey eyes locked with hers and she was a tiny mouse, hypnotized by the viper before her.

"One does not usually visit one's mistress and come away with three broken ribs, a broken nose, and damaged eyes." His fists balled but he visibly forced himself to remain calm. "We will come back to that later; it is clear enough _you_ did not inflict the damage. But then, we must conclude someone else did and the question is who? Who came through the fire that night? As yet I have no answer to this question but another detail caught my attention while I was reviewing my own memory of the events."

He pulled up a chair directly in front of her and leaned forward, still holding her in his eyes. "While taking in your exquisite body," November shuddered even in her current state, "I noted a rather unusual ring; a ring I personally had been seeking for quite some time. And this ring had belonged to a couple of whom I had ensured the death, a certain Titus Freyson and November Cadougan. A trip back further through memories brought them clearly to my mind and there, very clearly, was the ring on her hand. How then had my mistress come to possess it?"

He stood slowly and his eyes flashed terribly. November could only sit as his hand broke across her face, forcing her to now stare at the wall. Tears sprung out in the corners of her eyes from the stinging pain. Roughly, her head was turned back and Malfoy took his seat again.

"But this then set off a chain. For I would have sworn that I had seen this November well after she was dead. And the ring had never been found. So it was for the ring I began to look, finding it always with this woman who never looked the same twice." As he spoke he rolled back his sleeves and November felt sick with fear.

He began to list the times he had seen her, the times she had been wearing her ring in public and never realizing what it was. And each was paired with a brutal blow.

"The most obvious was a duel in Diagon Alley. Rings, after all." The back of his open hand caught her forehead.

"Again she appeared with Alastor Moody, that great fool." This time, his ring cut her cheek.

"A careless comment in a rather reckless duel in the woods about being dead." His fist broke open the corner of her mouth, splitting his own knuckle on her tooth.

"And then," he drew up before her and she knew what was coming next: the deepest insult of all. "And then I began to follow that foul creature, for he was with her in the cottage. And that woman, that shameless slut, was fornicating with the monster in an alley!" The force of the next strike made her ears ring.

"So the bitch was not dead. That much was immediately clear. And this ring remained with her. But how to find her? An insistent feeling led me to the memory of the day we met." He placed his hands over her arms, crushing them into the arms of the chair. "Would you like to guess what you were wearing that night?"

Though she had regained the ability to speak, November stayed silent. He stood again, staring down at her.

"The ring," his voice was a almost inaudible growl. "November and Helena were one and the same. All the time I had spent…" he broke off and his fist swung for her again, catching her in the eye.

"And a well timed move of pure stupidity on Potter's part only confirmed my suspicions. The werewolf gave himself away, seeking personal revenge in such a shameful way... However, the way you looked at that bastard, that HALF-BREED!" Grabbing her shoulders he threw her as hard as he could, though not very effectively, and she slammed into the table, falling onto her stomach.

He smoothed back his hair and turned away from her. Even in danger beyond what she could imagine, this struck November as odd. There was emotion at play here; this was not business as usual.

"Fenrir volunteered the fact that you told him your name was Helena Freyson, not Helena Everdeen, upon meeting him as well," Lucius said with forced calm. "I can only assume that as you are here and the ring is not you have placed in the hands of Dumbledore." There was a particular scorn in his voice that he saved just for the headmaster.

He turned back to her and magically tossed her back into the chair. She finally had the strength to move her head of her own accord and she watched him as he paced before her again.

"Let us go back to where we started. Would it have been the creature–"

"My lover," she shot back, speaking for the first time since he had drugged her.

Grey eyes turned to steel. "And how long, dear November, have you defiled yourself with this monster?"

"I was his before you and I had ever met." She knew it was stupid to provoke him but hearing Remus talked about like this brought out the worst in her.

"_Crucio!_"

She was screaming even after the spell released her. Every fiber of her body burned and she was crying.

"And would it have been this bastard who beat me as I lay senseless on your floor?" Lucius raged at her, beyond trying to be calm.

"No," she spat back. "That was Sirius Black."

His fist connected with her temple and she fell forward, unmoving and unconscious.


	18. Chapter 18: Legilimens

**Chapter 18: Liligimens**

When November regained consciousness, the room was darker and at first she thought she had been left alone. She was sitting against a wall and moonlight poured onto the stone floor.

However, her eyes landed on Lucius Malfoy and she could not help, despite everything, but feel a sharp pang of guilt. He was leaning against a pillar and staring off at a wall. But his face, in this moment when he thought no one was looking, betrayed hurt and sadness that she had always assumed he could not feel. Feeling her eyes on him, he spun to her, his face recomposing itself into the usual cool mask.

"I see you have returned," he murmured, laying a hand against her face and causing her to wince and scoot as far from him as she could.

"All this time," he continued, letting his hand drop, "I have done all I could imagine for you. And you…" He trailed off and knelt beside her. His hand reached up again to touch her face but this time she could feel the pain leaving; whether he meant to or not he was healing her with his touch.

The hurt look came back again as he spoke. "Was there ever a time when you cared? Was there ever a moment when you wanted me?"

November's heart broke with guilt. She, of all people in the world, had hurt Lucius Malfoy. Not that he hadn't deserved what he got (current state proved that) but here was a Death Eater with the capacity and desire to care and she had preyed on that. And the only result, the only possible result, would be a hardening of his heart.

She also knew, from all she knew of him, that were she to say yes he would release her from it all; were she only to renounce her past actions, he would care for her forever. But it would be a lie; there had been moments, of course, but it would not be truth.

Lucius waited, heart pounding despite himself, his eyes searching her face. It frustrated him to no end that even after her betrayal and now learning of her affair he still cared. He still meant exactly what he had told her before: he would have married her if that was what it took for him to possess her.

"Never," she finally answered. "Not once."

She watched in fear as he walked a few steps from her and then, picking up a curved fire poker, swung it at her side. Her scream tore through the room as the metal clawed into her. The poker was yanked free and blood quickly soaked her white shirt.

There was a loud throat-clearing cough and both were surprised to see Snape appear in the door.

"I must admit that it is rather distracting."

Lucius leaned on the poker as if it were his cane. "There may be need of you yet tonight. Close up your ears, Severus."

Snape's eyes flickered to her only momentarily. "If I am to finish the potion for the Dark Lord in time, I cannot remain here. How you complete your business is your own matter, however I would advise you not to interfere with the Dark Lord any more than you already have."

November's breathing was loud in the room as Lucius considered the warning. "Then I would suggest you take your leave, Severus."

"Very well." And without a glance back, Snape disappeared.

* * *

><p>Lupin collapsed into a chair in the drawing room with the others, face buried in his hands.<p>

Remus had become convinced something was wrong when after an hour she had not returned. After all, it was only for candles.

He had searched the entire neighborhood along with everyone at the wake, excluding Molly who had her hands full keeping the kids inside. Dumbledore had left to consult with several portraits and the seeing-eye stone.

"There has to be something," Tonks murmured, gently laying a hand on his shoulder. She hoped for his sake that November was alive. It had been three hours since November had gone out.

The front door opened and closed. Everyone in the room froze, looking quickly at Remus. Shakily he got to his feet, praying he would see November enter the room. Instead, Severus Snape crossed the threshold and stopped before Lupin.

"What have you done?" Lupin asked, trying to take a step and nearly falling from his shaking legs. It seemed clear enough that Snape would not be here now unless he knew something, or had done something, having no interest in the wake.

"I have done what I had to do," Snape snapped back, but it was clear from his facial expression that he did not savor whatever that had been. "Upon my… disentanglement from November, I was given a task to fulfill as proof. Having no other option, I have completed this task. At this moment, November is at Malfoy Manor."

Lupin paled completely, looking almost ghostly. He fell back into the chair he had been in. This was the worst possible thing he could imagine.

"And you did not come sooner because…" Remus could not even look at Snape.

"I was to stay at the Manor. I only convinced Malfoy recently that my departure would be for the best. I came here as soon as I was able."

"How…" his voice failed and he spoke louder, "how is she?"

"She has admitted to being your lover –"

"No…" Remus breathed.

"and Lucius has not taken this well. It has however saved her life."

"WHAT?" Molly could not help but shout when she heard this pronouncement.

Snape fixed cold black eyes on her before resting them back on Remus. "Had she simply betrayed him, Lucius would have raped and killed her, as he has been ordered to do by the Dark Lord. As it is, she will be left to Fenrir at the Shrieking Shack."

"You call that an improvement?" Alastor bellowed, patience completely gone.

"If she is moved we have some chance of getting to her! Lucis's conviction that her involvement with Remus has ruined her means she will not be kept in Malfoy Manor, where there would be no possible chance of reaching her!"

Remus hurried out of the room looking as if he were going to be sick. Molly started after him but Arthur quickly stopped her.

A conversation continued inside but Remus was no longer listening. Grabbing his wand, he slipped silently out of the house and into the night.

* * *

><p>"Have mercy!" November cried, more afraid of a grieved Lucius than an angry one. "If you ever cared!"<p>

Lucius flung the poker to the other side of the room and took her still bruised face in one hand, digging fingertips into the flesh. "It is because I cared that I must. I have made certain promises that I must keep."

He pulled out his wand and November's mind whirled. "I saved your life!" The words burst out of her as she thought them.

Malfoy stopped, frozen completely. Slowly, he turned to face her. "What did you say?"

"I saved your life."

He stared at her openly. "You lie."

"I saved you when you attacked the cottage. You would have died."

"I never attacked a cottage." But Lucius's tone was unconvinced. When he had been going through his memory he had found a fight in a wood that had no beginning and no end.

"You did, and I saved you," November insisted. "Look at my memories! I am not lying!"

His wand pointed between her eyes and she flinched involuntarily.

"_Liligimens!_"

Lucius watched as Remus blew away part of his face and shoulder with an obliviate spell before falling to Dolohov's curse. November had knocked herself out on a tree after stunning Dolohov. Lucius watched in horror as he lay bleeding out on the ground. After it was dark November rushed to Remus before seeing his body. The action infuriated him even more but he could clearly hear her say that she would save him in order to save the werewolf. She had not done it for him, but she had saved his life.

November watched Lucius jerk away from her, the memory ended. He began pacing rapidly in front of her, seeming at war with himself. November watched him, completely unsure what would now happen. After a time, Lucius stopped pacing and locked eyes with her.

"Fenrir take you then," Lucius spoke softly and with repressed emotion. "I'll have no more to do with you."

He turned on his heel and left her, slamming the door behind him and enclosing her in darkness.

* * *

><p>They were so caught up in the bleakness of the situation and the debate as to what to do that twenty minutes had passed before anyone noticed Lupin's disappearance.<p>

"Did Remus ever come back?" Hermione finally asked, interrupting the debate that raged in the room.

Moody's eye spun wildly to her and then all around him before he shook his head. "He's not here. He's gone."

"At what point did he leave?" Snape growled.

"When you said she'd be at the Shrieking Shack," Tonks replied.

Snape looked as angry as any of them had ever seen him. His fists clenched and he went a sick shade of white. "The Shrieking Shack has been set up as a trap just for him! The fool has walked right into it because he, like all of his stupid friends, cannot simply LISTEN and ACT RATIONALLY!"

Everyone was too speechless to argue with the insults.

"What do you mean just for him?" Molly's voice shook.

"Why do you think she will be left with Fenrir? Why do you think Malfoy picked somewhere that only a handful of people, Lupin among them, can enter? Fenrir will kill them both!"

Quickly, Alastor stood up and pointed to Kingsly and Snape. "You two, with me. We've got to get to her before he does!"


	19. Chapter 19: Will You?

_And here we are reaching the last chapters! I seriously can't believe it's nearly finished! _

_Thank you everyone, especially DZAuthor and javalon14, who have seen this thing through! _

_Please Note: We have not seen the last of Lucius Malfoy (so don't worry all of you who are hoping for justice!). Also, there may or may not be a final lemon to follow. ;-)_

_And in unrelated news, I have two ideas floating around the brain for my next story that I'm torn between (one with Lucius and one with BBC Sherlock) so if you have a vested interest in one or the other, vote in the poll on my profile!_

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 19: Will You?<strong>

November had been so exhausted that she had slept deeply almost as soon as Lucius had left her. It was an enveloping sleep and she knew nothing in the darkness that had swallowed her. She would have slept for hours longer, her body and mind fighting hard to recover, if it had not been for the intense feeling of someone watching her.

She slowly woke on a four-poster bed that had been recently thick with dust. Someone had shaken out the bedspread on which she lay so the piles of dust bunnies drifted about the floor, making slithery tracks. Following the footprints marked out in the wood she could see Remus and Sirius's footprints from several years before, now layered over with dust as well. The most recent footprints, however, lead to a man in the corner of the room.

Fenrir Greyback reclined lazily in what had once been a richly embroidered armchair. His eyes never left November even as she looked about the room.

"There'll be no escaping so best not try." His voice was hoarse and gravelly. "You know where you are?"

November nodded, too alarmed to refuse answering. Lucius had reason to listen to her and deal with her mouth; Fenrir did not.

"Say it," he leaned forward, still staring at her with eyes that bored into her.

"The Shrieking Shack…"

He looked satisfied and leaned back again. It was more unnerving to November that he was doing nothing. She would have expected an attack.

"What…" she was nearly afraid to ask, not wanting to invite more cruelty.

"We are waiting," he answered.

"What for?" She hated how childish and helpless she sounded but she was completely at his mercy. The Shrieking Shack had been sealed off from the world around it by Dumbledore himself; there was no way she could break out of here on her own and her wand had been taken much earlier that evening.

Fenrir smirked at her. "We wait for Remus John Lupin. Could you guess why, poppet?"

"Please…" her throat tightened. "Just kill me and leave him alone!"

"You _will_ die. But not until you see the light leave his eyes." Fenrir grinned at her and it was a horrible sight.

There was a sound somewhere below them and November whirled toward the door. "REMUS! RU–"

But her warning was cut off as Fenrir flicked his wand easily at her. The bedspread wrapped tightly around her neck, cutting off her words and her air. She tore at it, fighting to not make a sound that might bring Lupin to her aid and failing as she began to gasp and choke for air. Lights exploded in her vision when she heard the door burst open.

"Release her!"

Remus had, of course, had no problems getting under the Whomping Willow and into the Shrieking Shack. He felt as if he were watching everything that he did from another perspective and adrenaline coursed through him, shocking his system. He aimed his wand at Fenrir who in turn released November from the magical stranglehold.

Remus's eyes landed on November for the first time and he started. He had no idea what to expect but what he saw was worse than what limited expectations he had conjured up. She was not dead, mercifully, but her face was spotted in swollen purple: a black eye, broken lip, and various bruises and cuts across her forehead and cheeks. Her camisole and jeans were shredded and beneath the gaps of fabric, shinny new scars stood out on her colorless skin. Her neck was now a glaring red as well as she finished unwinding the sheets from her neck.

"How good to see you again, Lupin," Fenrir mused, grinning. His ease put Lupin on his guard.

A flash of green flew from Fenrir's wand at Remus and he blocked it expertly.

"_Defodio!_" Remus's spell glanced past Fenrir but blew a hole in the floor, causing the older werewolf to stumble aside.

"_Sectumsempra!_"

Remus blocked the slashing curse and managed to get between November and Fenrir. "Get under the bed!"

Without protest, November rolled under the bed. Her wand was at the Manor and she was as likely to be killed by a stray spell as by a well-aimed one.

Fenrir's eyes glinted and rested on the bed. "_Confringo!_"

The four poster lept into flames, the canopy collapsing in the blast. Remus was quickly able to freeze the flames, reducing them to a decorative tickle, but the distraction was the real aim for Fenrir.

"_Everte Statum!_"

Remus slammed face-first into a large armoire, gashing his jaw. The blunt force to the face had his head reeling and he needed time. "_Confundus!_"

As Fenrir tripped into the hole in the floor, Remus afforded himself a small smile; the problem with Death Eaters was that they underestimated the simple spells.

As he tried to gather his wits, Fenrir stumbled, his back to the bed, and November grabbed his foot, tripping him and sending him sprawling. Both men looked momentarily surprised, as if they had forgotten she was under there, with the bed burning harmlessly above her. Fenrir acted but Remus was quicker.

"_Expelliarmus!_"

Fenrir's wand flew gracefully into Remus's hand. The werewolves stared at each other and in the next moment that same uncanny grin spread across Fenrir's face. His hand roughly grabbed the front of November's shirt and yanked her bodily from under the bed. With a quick roll, Fenrir had pinned November beneath him.

"LET HER GO!" Remus's voice had a murderous edge to it and she could see him moving through the room and seeking an angle where he would not hit her.

"You think I am going to play by your rules," Fenrir smirked. He locked eyes with November and she could feel him begin to shake as though having a seizure.

Fenrir's body began to change. November lay frozen, too caught up in the horror above her to attempt escape. His teeth lengthened, while his arms and legs shortened. Fur bristled over his body and a tail sprouted. Fenrir's head shot straight up and he gave an unearthly howl.

November lay paralyzed with fear; she was trapped under a fully transformed werewolf.

"No," Remus breathed, his hand dropping in defeat. This was the trump card, a force he would have to voluntarily lose to.

"Drop your wand." The human-ish voice that came from the creature made it clear how hard Fenrir was fighting to keep his human mind. He closed his jaws lightly around November's throat; if even one tooth broke the skin she would be cursed forever.

Remus only stared, wanting to negotiate and knowing he was in no position to do so. November tried to speak to him but a loud snarl silenced her. How this was even possible outside of the full moon, neither of them could imagine but they were not in a position to test his control. Remus's wand fell to the floor with a clatter, along with the wand he had taken from Fenrir.

A wolfish smile spread across Fenrir's muzzle and he lept. November screamed as his claws raked her face and when she rolled over blind panic fogged her mind. Fenrir had latched on to Remus's shoulder and yanked him to the ground. Blood coated his muzzle as he shook his head wildly, ripping into Remus's shoulder, and Remus was turning white with the pain. A blind punch in the nose sent Fenrir back a few paces, howling in pain. His eyes glinted murder and the werewolf tried now for his face, snapping viciously as Remus held the jaws apart with his hands. Blood began to run down his forearms as the teeth tore into the calloused skin.

November's mind cleared and she screamed the spell even though there was no need. "_Accio wand!_"

The wands both shot into her hands and with another shriek of "_stupefiy!_" both wands erupted in white light that send Fenrir into the wall with a force great enough to crack the boards. As he lay, unconscious, Fenrir slowly changed back, growing from wolf to man.

Remus was panting and white and November threw herself beside him, cradling his head in her lap. He tried to protest, knowing that she had probably suffered much more than he had, but the adrenaline was wearing off and he could hardly support himself.

"When you didn't come back…" Remus fought to speak, feeling like there were fifty things he wanted to say all at once.

She nodded, tears dripping onto his face. He pulled himself into a sitting position and held her to him, both regardless of their own injuries. November could hardly believe that after all she had been through she was safe in Remus's arms. This singular thought was the only thing she was really able to process as she clung to him. Shakily, Remus stood and helped November to her feet. She badly needed a doctor and looked as if she would drop at any moment.

"Never once has anything good happened to me here," Remus joked quietly, earning a weak laugh from November.

He opened the door and jumped back, wand whipping out before a familiar voice stopped the hex on his tounge. Alastor and Kingsly were outlined in the door and a dark figure behind them indicated a third person. November nearly fainted with relief.

"Where is he?" roared Moody. "Fenrir?"

Remus pointed to the still unconscious figure and Kinsgly nodded, quickly binding and levitating the Death Eater.

"One more for Azkaban," Kingsly said grimly. "At least you're both alive!"

As if on some sick cue, November bent double. Her eyes began to roll and she collapsed to the dusty floor. Remus could not have felt more dismayed if someone had stabbed her then and there.

Snape pushed into the room and knocked Remus aside roughly. Mad-Eye grabbed a hold of Remus quickly, clamping his arms to his sides to keep him from pummeling Severus. Snape had managed to stabilize her head, which had jolted about violently as she thrashed on the floor, and busily looked into her eyes and felt her pulse.

"It's a Taboo," Severus announced. November stopped screaming and now twisted silently on the floor. "The word 'alive' was most likely the trigger."

"Trigger for what?"

"Her death. Should the job remain unfinished."

"NO! Not now! Not after all of this!"

Mad-Eye knew that something had to be done quickly, if nothing else for Remus's mental health; no one should have to endure so much in one night. "Severus and Remus, take her to St. Mungo's. Kingsly will contact Dumbledore after getting rid of his baggage." The Auror reached deep into one pocket on his coat and conjured a fire in the decrepit fireplace. Throwing powder into the fire he shouted into it, "Nymphadora! Get in here!"

The heart-faced witch clambered out in mid-protest over the use of her first name when Alastor cut her off. "Enough! We're making an arrest."

Tonks' eyes widened as she silently guessed to whom he was referring. She nodded and the two of them disappeared through the fire with Mad-Eye shouting, "Malfoy Manor!"

Remus was torn between anger at Snape's betrayal and the real need for his help. His shoulder was still bleeding and he could hardly use his torn hands to lift November. Reading this in his expression, Snape quickly took November from Remus's arms. His face was closed off and Remus could not help but wonder if Snape was worried as well.

When they stepped through the fire, Remus saw Severus had brought them to the emergency ward of St. Mungo's. Remus hated being here since some bizarre and gruesome injuries could come through these fireplaces but this night he was so distracted he only noticed one witch being carried along in front of him.

The trio was given immediate priority after the Taboo was explained. November was laid on a hovering bed and raced to the next floor. Once it was clear she would be taken care of, Snape had disappeared without a word; this was not a situation he could afford to be caught in. Remus hardly noticed as he followed her bed through the halls, finally stopping in a private room for breaking fatal spells. He started after her until the door closed in his face and someone hurried up to him.

"I'm so sorry, sir, but we cannot let you through," a small nurse-witch explained, touching his shoulder sympathetically. She lifted her hand to find it red and gasped a little. "Sir, you must be admitted as well. You're bleeding heavily."

"I'm fine," he rasped, staring at November's door doggedly. He would not be moved until he knew how she was.

"But sir, what happened?" There was a real edge of concern in her voice.

"I was bitten by a werewolf."

The witch gasped and stepped back from him involuntarily. "Sir, how can you say–"

"It's not my first bite!" he snapped at her, bloody hands balling into fists. "I'm already a werewolf!"

The little nurse-witch's mind seemed to reel for a moment. "Has she…?"

"No," Remus whispered.

"I see…" There was a long pause. "Sir, you must get your wounds cleaned. Please. I'll do it myself."

Remus's eyes seemed to focus on her for the first time. The door opened and Remus was next to it in moments, distracted from the kindness of the nurse.

"She won't die," the wizard in white robes said quickly. "However, the Taboo and her other injuries have taken a toll on her body. She must be kept anesthetized for several days. Any lapse could do her great harm; she must fight off the rest of the Taboo's effects on her own."

The wizard met Remus's eyes. "Sir, I must ask, what happened?"

"She was tortured and I…" he coughed to clear his throat and hide his tears, "I tried to save her."

"By whom, sir?"

"Lucius Malfoy and Fenrir Greyback."

The nurse and the wizard were breathlessly silent. The wizard finally spoke uncertainly. "Sir, if that is your accusation, I must report it to the Aurors."

Remus was obviously losing what little energy he still had by trying to explain. "They've already been arrested."

The nurse-witch interrupted, feeling an immense amount of pity for him. "I'm sorry, but I have to get his wounds cleaned. He needs rest."

The wizard snapped out of his shock and nodded, hurrying away to write some owls.

"Sir?" the witch asked quietly, indicating to Remus which way to go.

He nodded wearily, allowing himself to be lead away.

* * *

><p>The next few days were a cloud for November. Any time she seemed to push through the cloud there was pain and yelling around her. But there was always the pressure of Remus's hand holding hers.<p>

The week crawled by for Remus. The little nurse who had bandaged him, Catherine, kept an eye on him, convincing him to eat and sleep at intervals. Any time he protested, she answered simply: "What would she want?" Remus would have wasted away had it not been for these little, helpful naggings.

He busied himself with the newspapers, hoping for a distraction, and it became more and more clear how important it was for November to recover, not just for his own heart. Lucius Malfoy had been successfully arrested that night, but few were willing to give testimony against him. Dumbledore had announced that the primary witness for this case was recovering and the trials had been postponed. While November's name was never mentioned specifically, to all who were in the Order it was clear who the key witness would be.

Five days after her admittance, Remus was asleep when November woke. His hand rested on hers and his head was slumped over on his shoulder, brown hair a bit more grey than it had been a week ago. His hands were newly shinny with scars from where Fenrir's jaws had cut them. November's eyes grew teary as she thought of the horrible irony of him being bitten twice by the same man.

Her hand tightened in his and he awoke slowly. But when he heard her say his name he was fully awake in a flash. For a long moment, he stared uncomprehendingly, but as she physically pulled her to him the reality broke through.

Their lips crashed together and they pulled tightly around one another, with November finally pulling him into the creaky collapsible bed with her. They curled up into a ball, limbs wrapped around each other in a tangle of two that made up one whole.

"You're alive," Remus breathed for the thousandth time as she laughed. He sounded no less awed than he had the first time.

"Was there any danger I wouldn't be?"

"Some…" His face grew grave. "They said you wouldn't die, but that isn't really the same as being alive."

She nodded. Her eyes locked with his, barely hiding her worry. "Malfoy...does he know I'm here?"

"He was arrested, along with Fenrir. He cannot hurt you any more."

With a sigh of relief, she pulled Remus to her again, kissing him with every ounce of herself. "I knew you were there. When I was asleep. You were always there."

"And I always will be."

As Remus spoke, the words triggered something he had been practicing in his head since that night a week ago.

November watched as he suddenly sat up and began rummaging in his pocket. He pulled a small box out of the pocket and climbed gingerly out of the bed.

"Remus, what…?" The question died on her lips as he knelt, on one knee, beside her hospital bed.

"I had meant this all for a better time," he began and her pulse skyrocketed. "However…" He trailed off and she understood perfectly: some need to live in the present had enveloped them, given to them by Sirius and her kidnapping.

A grin spread across his face that melted away the aging that stress had put there. Kissing her hand, he looked deep into her eyes.

"I would die for you and I would die without you. November…" The box opened, revealing a perfect diamond ring that sparkled up at her. "Will you marry me?"

"Of course," she answered through a glistening grin.

Remus slipped the ring onto her finger, almost disbelieving that it had really happened.

"It's not cursed, by the way. I checked."

With loud and jubilant laughter, they fell back into the bed, wrapped up in each other and in their joy.


	20. Chapter 20: For Better and For Worse

**Chapter 20: For Better and For Worse**

November's heart was in her throat. She stared at the door before her and felt her knees weaken.

As if sensing her emotions, Remus slipped an arm around her waist, comforting and supporting. The dark obsidian halls were loud with their shallow breathing and they waited to be summoned.

Today was Lucius Malfoy's trial. Within he had already been enclosed in the barbed cage used for Death Eaters and criminals. And when she was called to the stand, November would serve as witness against him.

The giant door before her opened and Remus grabbed her hand tightly.

"Miss November Cadougan?"

She nodded, trying to repress how nervous she was. This was an intensely personal trial and being near Lucius again frightened her.

The wizard stood aside and she stepped through. Remus gave her a weak smile and followed at a distance. It had taken quite the fit from November to get permission for him to sit in and he did not want to push his luck. He slid into a spot beside Tonks and Moody; they had already testified as to how Lucius had evaded them, going so far as to actively fight them, along with the discovery of November's wand on the scene (14-inch cedar with phoenix feather core). The stage had been set for her testimony.

November could feel his eyes on her from the moment she entered the room. His head moved slowly, following her path to the center of the room, and his face was emotionless. All of this she saw through the corners and sides of her vision; she would not look at him. He was hoping to throw her off and she would not allow any such thing.

Fudge looked more uncomfortable than she had ever seen him. He had announced his retirement but was sitting Head of the Wizengamot for another week. Rufus Scrimgeoursat beside him, the Ministry at large feeling that Fudge was hardly in a position to oversee this case without bias.

"November Helena Cadougan?" Fudge's voice rang out in the packed room.

She nodded again.

"You are here to stand with the prosecution and give testimony as to the activities of Lucius Malfoy, accused Death Eater?"

"I am."

There was a ripple through the room, though this was not new information.

"Miss Cadougan," Rufus interrupted. "I have come to understand that as far as the Ministry is concerned you are dead. Would you care to explain how this is possible, as you are sitting before us alive and well?"

"Not well. And only alive due to an oversight in the plans of the accused."

A louder ripple ran through the room and Lucius's eyes bored into her.

"Some of you will remember Titus Freyson," November spoke, keeping eye contact with the Wizengamot to avoid looking at Lucius. "We were engaged to be married and he was seeking certain dark objects he believed would be important to keep out of the hands of Death Eaters. After I received a ring from him, he was killed in his home. A day later my own home exploded and a body was found in the wreckage. That –" she paused sensing the expectation in the room, "was not my body."

"And the ring?"

"It was given to Albus Dumbledore upon its discovery. It was not obvious to me what had happened or why for some time."

"But if that is so–" Fudge began in his whining voice.

November was losing patience; he was going to get caught up in the ring and that was not the reason she was here. "Minister, I would like to submit evidence as to my accusations against Lucius Malfoy."

Out of the corner of her eye, she saw Draco stiffen.

"And what would you like to submit?"

Reaching into her pocket, November produced a vial that contained a white swirling thread. "Memories, sir."

The room nearly erupted and even Lucius betrayed his feelings, looking momentarily shocked.

"That is highly unusual, Miss Cadougan," Fudge began.

"This is highly sensitive, Minister. Surely you would prefer this method?" There was a glint in her eyes that Lucius recognized. Behind November, he could see the hungry and longing look on Rita Skeeter's face.

"Do you have a Pensive, Miss Cadougan?" Rufus asked, leaning forward and forcing Fudge behind him.

"I do."

Dumbledore's own Pensive was floated out into the middle of the room and the two Ministers, along with two other senior Wizengamot members made their way down to November. Rufus nodded to her and the four men broke the surface of the Pensive.

* * *

><p>The following hour was one of the longest of November's life. The Pensive floated eerily in the middle of the room and every occupant of the room watched it intently. All but one.<p>

Lucius's appearance was much changed already: he now sported dark circles around his eyes, a two day growth of beard, and a scar above his eye where Tonks had nailed him in retaliation during the arrest. And his hungry grey eyes never left November, watching her as if he would like nothing more than to have her as a snack.

While it was clearly intended as harassment, Remus knew better than to try to complain that he was staring at November.

There was a ripple in the surface of the Pensive and four men appeared from it. Fudge was white as a ghost and Scrimgeour'sjaw was set. Slowly, the men retook their seats and November locked eyes with Fudge. She had chosen the memories carefully, though the attempted rape and torture was more than enough for a conviction.

Fudge opened and closed his mouth and November's blood began to boil. He was waffling because it reflected very poorly on him that while he was having tea with Lucius all of this had been going on behind the scenes.

"My dear, I am so very sorry and–"

"I do not want your apologies, Cornelius!" November shouted, losing her controlled cool for the first time. "If you would like to make amends you will do as the law and as justice commands you!"

Rufus had cocked an eyebrow during her outburst and now leaned forward, again asserting his dominance. "All in favor of conviction and sentencing as a Death Eater?"

All four of the wizards who had been through the Pensive raised their hands.

"Lucius Malfoy," the blonde wizard turned his eyes away from her for the first time since she had entered, "you are hereby declared guilty of torture, sedition, conspiracy, and use of the Unforgivable Curses. While I am sure there is more to that list, you will serve a life sentence in Azkaban."

The gavel hit and November nearly fainted in relief. Her eyes instantly found Remus's and she had begun to stand. But _his_ voice had always caught her ear and she turned to Lucius.

"How could you?" he hissed at her. He knew as well as anyone in the room that he had a fighting chance until those memories hit the Pensive.

Again, pity stung at her and she approached him, ramrod straight in his cage.

"You don't have to choose this," she whispered so only he could hear. "You could be so _good_."

His lip curled and he was about to speak when he was removed from the cage and led away. She couldn't help but watch him go. She had meant what she said.

"November?"

The familiar voice made her turn away from Lucius and a smile spread across her face. Remus held his arms out to her and she flung herself into them.

"He cannot hurt you. Never again," Remus murmured into her hair, which was dark brown and exactly as it should be.

"November…" Scrimgeour'svoice caught their attention and they turned to him. "I believe there are some death records that need to be set straight. And of course there is the matter of the ring…"

"Of course, Minister," November replied, following him out of the round room with a wave back to Remus. "See you at home," she mouthed with a grin.

* * *

><p>November woke and recognized the comforter wrapped around her. It certainly wasn't hers though. The comforter belonged to Tonks.<p>

She sat up and quickly realized most of the room belonged to Tonks, with a few of her thigns sprinkled here and there. She tried to recall if she and Remus had fought but nothing came to mind. So why was she at Tonks' place?

Molly Weasly bustled into the room, throwing November into further confusion.

"Just waking up?" she grinned. "I hardly slept the night before our wedding!"

November remembered in a flash. Their wedding. She was getting married today. A silly grin spread cross her face and she bounded out of the bed to hug Molly.

"Couldn't be happier if it was Charlie," Molly whispered in her ear, her voice teary. "Now get ready!"

November raced around the room, grabbing up various articles of clothing before racing to the bathroom that had been magically added to the flat. Tonks looked barely awake herself and waved from the kitchen table. Quickly showering November thought back over the bustle of the past few weeks.

After Remus proposed, preparations for the wedding had begun in time with preparations for the trial.

She had thought it gauche to look for a wedding dress in all of this and had insisted she would just wear dress robes. However, an ambush from Mad-Eye had ended in a lovely and simple dress. The more she gushed over it the bigger his scowl grew, trying and failing to hide his blushing.

Anyone who wanted to be in the wedding was immediately welcomed into it. Hermione, Ginny, and Molly baked a cake that Bill of all people volunteered to decorate. The twins volunteered to man a reception firework show and Charlie agreed to be Man of Honor, earning jokes from the twins until he beat it out of them.

It was of course a painful reminder as well. Remus had left school with three friends as close as brothers and none of them would see him married.

November toweled off as fast as she could. Her hair had not changed color since her capture and she felt a huge sense of relief. The wedding was important in so many more ways than the wedding she had once planned with Titus. She had escaped a horrendous situation with her love and her life. Remus, who had once been so convinced that he would die alone, loved her with everything in him and had risked his life to save her. This was a beginning and this was a decision: a decision to choose hope that they would live a long life together.

Molly helped her into her dress as Tonks worked away at her hair. The two women could not help but remember the other times this had happened and November caught the younger smiling at her.

"What?"

"I always knew. I always knew you would be together."

November glowed with happiness. "How could you tell?"

"The way he looked at you. The way you always held his attention and his heart."

November was still grinning at the compliment when the door opened and the three of them screamed. Severus Snape, of all people, was outlined in the door. November cursed at him, regaining her color after turning white.

"Sorry," he drawled, sounding less than sincere. "I was told to collect you."

November's eyebrow shot up. "Molly, Tonks, we'll meet you in a second."

The pair hurried out, looking less than pleased about leaving them alone together.

When the door closed November turned back to Severus. "You volunteered to come here; they would never ask a favor of you. Why?"

He looked intensely uncomfortable and finally he spoke, not meeting her eyes.

"I never had any intentions of harming you," he murmured, almost to quietly to be heard.

Tears sprang to the corners of her eyes, not just for what he had said but for knowing what he had dealt with in all of this. She impulsively grabbed his hand and he did not resist.

"I know, Severus."

He nodded and moved his hand gently from hers. Absently he looked her up and down, standing before him in her wedding dress. "Do you not have a necklace of some sort?"

"Nothing that didn't come from Malfoy."

Snape reached into his pocket and took out a silver coin. Laying it on the bedside table he pointed his wand at it murmuring a spell. The coin transfigured, blooming into a water lily made of silver, with petals as fine and detailed as lace, hanging from a fine silver chain.

He held it out to her. "A wedding present." As soon as she had taken it he left, stopping to wait for her in the hall.

When their eyes lighted on it, Tonks and Molly were stunned. It was a gorgeous piece of transfiguration and a present from Severus was something to gawk at no matter what.

"We should go though," reminded Molly. "It's time!"

* * *

><p>Remus felt lightheaded enough to pass out and he had to fight the urge to bolt. Alastor Moody standing behind him was a fairly solid motivation not to though.<p>

He could not believe he was getting married. He had always sworn he wouldn't do this, that he couldn't do this to anyone he loved.

But when November appeared at the end of the aisle, on Arthur Weasley's arm, he remembered why he was doing this. She was worth it and above all else she had chosen this. A week before the wedding she had told him that he would have to kill her to get rid of her, that she would always look for him and always find him until she died. And those words, that choice, had calmed something in him that had fought and stirred for much of their relationship.

She stopped in front of him, glowing behind a birdcage veil. November saw his eyes fix questioningly on her necklace. She mouthed the word "Severus" at him and his expression went from curious to surprised.

With a small smile, Dumbledore began the ceremony.

And so they were married under the setting sun, in a lovely little clearing of a forest. The reception carried them late into the night and they escaped to a nearby cottage. Their new home and a haven for two people who had been running and hiding and fighting for far too long.

And at the end of it all, with bare skin wrapped around bare skin, it was all either of them had ever wanted.

* * *

><p><em>:-D<em>

_There will be an epilogue so stick around for that! _

_There have been a stunning amount of views and alerts and favorites for which I am extremely grateful, so thank you everyone! _


	21. Epilogue: Battle at Hogwarts

**Epilogue: Battle at Hogwarts**

Lucius heard the scream even as he threw his arms around his son. He heard the scream and knew in a moment whose it was. He closed his grey eyes, trying to block out everything it brought to mind. Trying and failing.

He had pulled that scream from her himself and he had paid dearly for it. He turned in spite of himself and locked eyes with November, who lay on the floor across the corridor screaming in pain.

And as he watched her bleed a thousand memories flooded his mind.

* * *

><p>Lucius had indeed gone to Azkaban. He had heard rumors that it was better for him to be there at that time and he had not doubted it. He had hoped, foolishly, that his good standing would go on forever but the cold truth that he was now disposable gripped his heart.<p>

As any happy thoughts were immediately washed from his mind, he had dwelled on the wrongs that had been done to him. Wrongs done to him by Narcissa, by Voldemort, by Potter, and, more immediately, by November. The traitorous bitch had deceived him, hurt him, and repaid his affections with an Azkaban jail sentence.

When he had been broken out, there had been talk of killing November in return for her betrayal. But she had disappeared and honestly Lucius had not worked very hard to find her. She would be very hard to get to with the Order in front of her and he did not need another failed mission on his neck.

Or so he told himself.

One thing continued to eat at him to a point he finally could not ignore it. November had told him he had chosen this and that he could be good. While he doubted a search for goodness was in his soul, the weight of his decisions had eaten away at him. He was by nature a man that would push the blame away, placing it on anyone but himself, until no other options were left. And now, faced with the dead end that was his life, he had to acknowledge what he had chosen, what he had gotten himself and his family into.

Narcissa had reentered his life after his release. You could never really leave the Dark Lord, and in an attempt to further mock him, the Dark Lord had brought her back to live in the Manor. In a very rare moment, Lucius had apologized to Narcissa, for maybe the fifth time since they had married. They both needed someone to hold on to as the night had closed around their lives and they had begun their relationship again.

And not a moment too soon; the battle was soon on at Hogwarts with his son on the wrong side of the battle lines.

In a desperate attempt to change the dominos he had set into motion years and years ago, Lucius and Narcissa had abandoned the fight, searching only for their son in the melee. And with an astounding amount of luck, Lucius was able to wrap his arms around both his son and his wife once again.

And then he heard her scream. Her words rang in his ears and he began to move towards her, drawing out his wand slowly.

* * *

><p>November had been distracted when the slashing spell hit her. The force of it had blown her onto her side. It took her a moment to realize that her left arm lay on the other side of the corridor. A quick spell sent a pile of rubble at her attacker, burying him, and she tried to move. Only then did the wave of pain hit her.<p>

Despite herself she screamed, more in frustration and surprise than pain. Realizing her mistake she looked around quickly and found herself once again caught in Lucius' gaze. She watched as he began to move toward her, slowly pointing his wand at her.

* * *

><p>When the Azkaban breakout had been announced there had been instantaneous panic in their home of two. But November insisted they wait. Bill and Fleur's wedding was fast approaching and they all needed something to celebrate. Remus was needed for moving Harry as well.<p>

Though November had begged him to let her go but he had insisted she wait with Molly. It had been the worst few hours of her life. Molly was so good at containing things but she was not and she paced the entire house, floor to attic a dozen times before she heard anyone approach. Instead of a warm hug, however, she found her husband's wand at her neck. But once it was clear she was not a Death Eater in disguise her bones were nearly crushed in Remus's arms. Her relief was so strong it made her weak in the knees.

And then there had been the wedding. Something so fresh and hopeful. But the Ministry had fallen that very night and Remus was instantly convinced the Death Eaters would be out looking for her, if they had not been already. She had turned on them, put Lucius Malfoy in Azkaban, and married a werewolf: three offenses against their system.

There was only one real way to hide now.

But how could one be locked up in a house with a werewolf for years on end? Snape could not be relied on to provide potions and November had never been inclined towards Potions herself.

And in some stupid attempt to "help," Remus had left her. November still refused to think about the following two days.

It was Tonks that had offered the solution. Fleur had an uncanny knack for Potions and they could be brought to Tonks through Arthur Weasley. The couple was only too glad to make her their Secret Keeper and they were then able to pass the next year or so in relative safety.

Neither being ones for simply sitting out on the sidelines, Remus had helped by working through Potterwatch and November had transferred information in an out of Hogwarts and the Hog's Head through Sir Cadougan. And on the full moon, November read aloud by their fire, stroking her husband's scarred muzzle.

The news of the battle had been brought to them by Sir Cadougan. They had heard his shouting from the second floor and had rushed down half dressed to the grim news.

November had acted immediately, pulling her wand on Remus before he could get to his own across the room.

"I swear to you," she whispered, "I will drop you if you try to keep me here. I would die for you and I would die without you."

These were the very words Remus had used when he asked her to marry him. He nodded, knowing it would be stupid to fight her in this and craving her presence if he were to go to what could very well be his death.

They had managed to stay close for most of the battle, but the natural progression of things broke them apart. Each had raced through the Great Hall when the ultimatum from Voldemort had been announced and the Death Eaters had withdrawn, looking among the bodies and dreading what they might find. When they found one another, they had collided with enough force to knock Remus back a few steps.

And then it had been time to grieve, for many of their friends, their Secret Keeper among them, had been killed in the first wave. Fighting off tears, Remus had explained to the remaining Order members how Tonks had died at the hands of Fenrir Greyback while protecting Remus herself. And for that Fenrir had paid with his life.

But again in the second wave they had been separated and now November lay alone in a corridor with only Lucius for company.

* * *

><p>November fought hard to ignore the growing pool of blood. And the approach of Lucius Malfoy. If he was here to kill her, she just hoped it would be quick.<p>

There was a scrambling sound to their right and they both jerked around to face the sudden menace. But it was Remus, climbing over the pile of rocks she had thrown at the Death Eater and holding his side. Blood oozed from between Remus's fingers and he appeared to be holding some of his insides inside. His face was grey and if he kept screwing around on the rock pile he would kill himself.

* * *

><p>Remus had never been more happy, nor more disbelieving than the day he had married November. His only regret was the timing of it all.<p>

She had refused to go into hiding after Malfoy was broken out of Azkaban. The Weasleys were important to her and she would go to that wedding one way or another. The anxiety gave him ulcers but after the Battle of Seven Potters he could hardly deny her the right to be there; he had insisted she stay at the Burrow which he knew would be harder for her to bear but much safer.

But the attack at the wedding…even thinking about it made cold panic wash over him. He had forced her to leave, taking Bill and Fleur with her, knowing that she was a marked witch.

Now it was clear they would have to go into hiding. But facing the actual logistics of it, Remus realized how much his presence complicated everything.

He would not lock his wife up with a werewolf for an indeterminate length of years. Any good husband would never do such a thing and Remus Lupin had left. He had located Harry at the Black home and tried to join with them, knowing he was an experienced and capable wizard. But he had gotten only loud criticism and a fight. Remus had holed up in the Three Broomsticks after he left, with only his guilt for company.

It was a dilemma he had not faced since November had been tied to Lucius. He would not endanger her like this and yet Harry had been right. He could not abandon his wife; he could not damage the relationship he valued most. But by leaving he had already torn that treasured fabric.

Remus returned early the next morning. November was sitting, awake and with a face puffy from tears, in their living room staring at the dying embers of the fire. She had risen slowly and walked up to him. He had begun to speak but she had slapped him with all of her might and left the house.

Remus knew that with her pockets magically enlarged she could theoretically be carrying everything she owned on her person. If she left he may never see her again and why this had not occurred to him earlier he had no idea.

So outside their home, in the dirt, he had fallen to his knees and begun to cry for what was maybe the sixth time in his adult life. And as much as November had wanted to hurt him back, she could not stand hearing his pain and she had returned to him. His apologies had only stopped hours later when Tonks had appeared at their door with the solution.

The next months were, despite being increasingly dangerous and dark, some of the most comfortable since they had gotten married. They each had something to do, something that gave them a sense of purpose, and they were safe for the first time since they had met.

But all of this had been leading up to one point: the Battle. And though he had wanted her to stay safe, Remus knew if he was going into this he needed her beside him.

He had lost her in the chaos and ended up in the owlery. And wile it had at first seemed that chance had brought him there, it was quickly shown to be the machinations of Fenrir himself, looking to settle the score between them. But they had not been as alone as they had thought.

Tonks had somehow discovered the trap and her appearance had distracted Remus. Taking his chance, Fenrir had thrown a spell Remus had never seen before. Tonks had blocked the spell but it had reacted to her shield, throwing itself back on her. She was dead before she hit the floor. Without mercy, Remus had thrown a barrage of crossbow bolts at Fenrir's back, ensuring the death of one of the most brutal werewolves in wizarding history.

At the announcement of temporary cease-fire, Remus had brought Tonk's body to the Great Hall and had begun looking for the body of his wife. But mercifully she had not been among them and was very much alive as she flung herself onto him.

And then the brief and horrible time when they thought Harry was dead. The fighting had resumed and once again Remus had lost November.

He had been working with some dragontamers to bring down a troll when he had heard her voice, up and to his left. The distraction had earned him a swipe of the huge club across the gut, but he tore off after November. He had lost a lot of blood and was blocked by a huge pile of rubble when he heard her scream.

Forcing himself to climb he pulled himself to the top of the heap in time to see November lying at the feet of Lucius Malfoy in a pool of her own blood.

* * *

><p>November tried to shield her face, to prevent Remus from trying to make it over the pile but it was too late.<p>

"Get away from her, you bastard!" It took so much of his energy just to shout at Malfoy and his vision was swimming.

Reaching out a hand unsteadily, Remus began to make his way down the rock pile. But the rocks had grown slippery with his blood and he tumbled over them heavily and landed face down. He tried to move for only a moment before sinking into unconsciousness.

November would have screamed but she was so weak. She could only watch Lucius train his wand on Remus for a moment before turning back to her.

The former Death Eater did not speak but she could feel something happening to her. As she looked around she could see the pool of blood receding, seeping back into her arm. She looked up open mouthed as she realized what was happening: Lucius Malfoy was healing her. It was far too late to save her arm but he was saving her life.

The wound closed and scabbed.

Lucius Malfoy lowered his wand.

"You were right." The words were so quiet that even if someone else had been present they would not have heard. And with that, he turned and left, back to his family and out of her life forever.

November raced to Remus, tipping over almost immediately now that the counterweight her arm provided was gone. Laying hands on him, she was still and focused for several solid minutes, growing new skin over the gaping hole and giving him all of her own vitality that she could afford. She would have opened her veins for him if she had thought it would help.

But finally, mercifully, Remus's golden eyes opened and through cracked lips he breathed her name.

And it was in the next moment the news reached them that Voldemort had been defeated.

* * *

><p>Remus was grading when the door downstairs opened and closed again, loudly blowing shut from the chill winter breeze. The sounds of a choir in the main street of Hogsmeade reached his ears in the brief interval.<p>

"How was the Ministry?" he called down, turning away from his grading and rubbing his temples.

"A bitch," November called up to him, pulling off her boots and cloak. "What's new there though?"

Remus laughed dryly and meandered downstairs. He kissed her quickly on his way to the tiny kitchen. He cooked when she had to stay late on the Ministry and invariably he made a stew. Otherwise he forgot there was something cooking and burned it.

Sneaking up behind him, November slipped her freezing hand up his shirt causing him to gasp in surprise and squirm away from her. He pulled her close to him and blew on her hand to warm it as he spoke.

"Still a wreck?"

"Not Kingsly's fault at all of course but yeah."

November had been working as a sort of de facto Auror, seeing as the Minstry needed all the help it could get to pull itself back onto its feet. While she had not been a particularly valuable spy and had no desire to continue on as an Auror (especially with only one arm), she knew more than enough to disprove some of the Imperious claims that came up in courts and she was handy enough in a duel.

"You talked to Kingsly?"

"Yeah," November grinned. "He reacted as you said he would but in the end I talked him into just letting me be an assistant to someone or other when all this cools off. He was talking about putting me into the Department of Magical Law Enforcement's werewolf regulation offices on account of my lovely husband. I might take him up on that. We've been having great luck with werewolf defectors recently."

"And Malfoy?" Remus asked, calmly. He asked this every so often, refusing to completely let his guard down.

"The Younger's a real ass but the Elder is quietly living his life in the Manor and apparently running an apothecary of all things."

"The Younger's at the Ministry?" Remus asked with surprise.

"That was my reaction but yeah. Working his way already, the worm. He's been useful enough though."

"Hard to believe they're old enough now."

November laughed. "Hard to believe _we're_ old enough. How were classes?"

November began setting the table with a flick of her wand and she glowed inwardly as a smile lit up Remus's face. He had been offered the Defense of the Dark Arts position by McGonagall, who was now the Headmistress of Hogwarts (the Order of Merlin combined with the permanent removal of Lucius Malfoy from the school board had helped) and November had never seen him this happy. She knew him very well but she had met him at a point in life and in history that did not allow for prolonged joy and because of this they had both known sadder sides of one another. But now…Now they had come full turn.

November found Remus to be more languid and trusting than she had first thought. And charming! He had always been winning but now it was nearly impossible for her to believe that he had only had a handful of girlfriends. Remus found November to be one of the most organized and efficient witches he had ever met, making it very clear why Mad-Eye had sought her out himself when he discovered she was not dead. She was also much more grounded emotionally. Apparently living a double life with the man who "killed" her could really do a number on someone's emotional stability.

November marveled out loud as he described the winter final he had devised for his students, swearing up and down that she could never teach as well as he did.

She had adapted to eating and working one handed, though she never lost the feeling that she was lopsided. Her robes had been tailored to close on the left side and Remus woke up half an hour early every morning to help do up the back of her robes. Kingsly had offered to look into possible arm replacements, but November had declined. Everyone had their scars and hers were not a priority.

For example, the patch of shiny pink skin across Remus's torso. But thanks to a new amendment to the list of critical life-long illnesses deserving treatment, Remus could receive the Wolfsbane Potion every month from St. Mungo's. That scar had been his last.

Later in the evening they curled up together in front of their fireplace, for they had both insisted any home they ever had must have a fireplace. With glasses of wine and a book each, they both knew that this was the life they had always wanted and this was the person they were meant to spend that life with.

* * *

><p><em>THE END! :-D<em>

_Big thanks as always to everyone who read or commented! I had a lot of fun writing this!_


	22. Last Bit O' News

Last little announcement (thanks for being patient with me)!

New Lucius/OC story is up and is called The Wanting so feel free to check that out.

Description:

Mircea is recruited to the Death Eaters for strategy and to keep an eye on Lucius. Their dislike of one another is immediate, but forced companionship may change their minds. And when brokenness, doubt, and tragedy separate them from their own cohorts, all they have left may be one another. AU but follows Book 7 very closely.

M but no lemons this time around.

Thanks!


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